Just farted in front of a patient

[PussGirl]

Just that really. Leant forward slightly while standing to examine her & PAARP! Not terribly loud but distinctive, although I tried to cover it up by moving the chair with my foot to make a similar noise

Not smelly thank goodness

I just ignored it & carried on

She (teenage) & her mum will now be trying to decide whether I did or didn't. I have to review her in a fortnight -

🤣🤣🤣

Ha! I regularly teach clients about relaxation - if you get the session before lunch you may well hear my stomach rumble during the exercises!

I once silent-farted so bad in a supermarket that a lady in the aisle went off to complain about the drains

I'm sure they heard it, sorry. They could hardly say anything about it though.

Your luck is that it wasn't smelly. How fortunate for you or you'd have had to excuse yourself and hurry out the door or something.

That was meant to be a

I popped in to see my mil the other day, she was having a nap so I tiptoed out of her room but farted so loudly that she woke up!
I was doubled up laughing and trying to explain. She thought it was so funny. I hope I can be like that at 98.!

Just to be clear..it was me that farted. She is much too lady like to let one rip.

Hahaha @EatSleepRantRepeat that's so funny!
My dad once parked in the street and farted when he got out of the car. A man was walking past and said 'oh, hello 😊' he thought my dad had spoken to him!

That's brilliant @minniejackson - it must have been very low pitched 😁

@Damnyoureyes

Horrified and mortified I dropped one in the covid bay at work.

Out of nowhere type.

Trouble is I have no idea of the stench on account of my military grade FFP mask.

All patients nearby already short of breath did not seem to gasp clutching for fresh air any more than they already were, so I can only assume that it wasn’t a bad one.

I did a mental recap of the menu consumed in the preceding 24 hours just to check for offensive items, but there were none.

If you're going to let rip surely a ward full of people with no sense of smell is the ideal place!

I coughed yesterday on a crowded train (which is socially awkward enough at the moment!!) and farted loudly at the same time. I had headphones on at the time and thought, oh thank god that wasn’t as loud as it could have been! Then remembered my headphones and realised it probably was that loud. 😬😂

Haha! yes @EatSleepRantRepeat and almost two toned 😂

I love a farting thread

Some of the funniest MN stories are on farting threads

I’ve done the moving chair, or pretending to burp tricks

I’m finding as I mature some just jump and I’m not even 50 yet 😬

Lol @OhWhyNot my kids do the one's that sound like smacks 😂 they sound painful. I remember a poster once said her gran walked to the door farting with every step, then did it all the way back

I can’t fart but my stoma can, the advantage is no smell. If anyone gives me a look I lift my top, they always end up more embarrassed than me!

I only ever need to fart in work. After a patient had a fall I bent down with the sling and let out a really long one. I was working with an agency nurse so I was mortified and hope to this day she thought it was the patient. She never did come back for another shift

If I get warning I try to get into the sluice

Had to go into the aircraft front toilet to try and disperse what felt like litres of foul air before taking my seat in 7f or similar. After a suitable delay I opened the toilet door to be met with the beaming face of the aircraft captain no less (mortified!) - and he had to go in there after me...

When DP & I were still in the first flush of infatuation, we were doing an event together at which he was very much the senior lead, and I just did a lot of 'oh, DP's really the person you ought to speak to, he's in charge.'

After about an hour of this, the crowds thinned a little, he looked over at me with a significant look & a secret smile. I gave him a little flirtatious smile. He shifted his position slightly, and let out a very high-pitched TOOOOOT. Years have passed, I have never mentioned that I heard it, but I will never forget the horror on his face.

And now I am silently shuddering with giggles about it all over again

LOL, a change for once, this time is the examiner instead of the patient!
Do not worry, we are all human, and better out than in.

I teach resus - managed to fart at 120bpm as I did chest compressions on a manikin….

I think that was a session my learners won’t forget….

I have sneezed whilst working with a client once and the loudest fart came out! I apologised and tried to make a joke about it but they pretended not to know what I was talking about
They were either deaf or felt very sorry for me, a little while later they might have realised because it was stinky.
That's just one of many embarrassing fart moments in my life, only recently been diagnosed with gut problems

@sadeyedladyofthelowlandsea

When DP & I were still in the first flush of infatuation, we were doing an event together at which he was very much the senior lead, and I just did a lot of 'oh, DP's really the person you ought to speak to, he's in charge.'

After about an hour of this, the crowds thinned a little, he looked over at me with a significant look & a secret smile. I gave him a little flirtatious smile. He shifted his position slightly, and let out a very high-pitched TOOOOOT. Years have passed, I have never mentioned that I heard it, but I will never forget the horror on his face.

And now I am silently shuddering with giggles about it all over again

😂😂😂

I wanted to fart really badly while sitting at my desk at work. It was seeping out and I was squeezing so hard not to let it that it went up my vagina. Didn't even know that was possible. When I got up to go to the loo I did a massive fanny fart. No one said a word and I just kept walking a

Bodies eh?