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Wwyd Nursery left nappy on for hours

42 replies

withpeaceandlove · 05/11/2021 10:51

DS is 4 and fully toilet trained but wears nappies for bed and nap time. When I got him home from nursery yesterday I noticed he was wearing a nappy, it was absolutely swinging and he'd soiled it. I've now spoken to them and they've confirmed that they forgot to take his nappy off after his nap. I've worked it out and this means he was left in the nappy for a minimum of 4.30 hours. He has 3 big sores and they're very raw and weepy, he's been complaining about the soreness since last night.
Now I'm genuinely unsure as to what to do? Do I just accept it's a one off mistake and leave it? It was his key person who forgot to take it off and she's generally great and we get on well. I'm not a confrontational person and I'm worried this will make things awkward for me in the future if I kick up fuss but at the same time I feel that it's just not acceptable. Wwyd?

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xxxGirlCrushxxx · 05/11/2021 10:53

If it was a one off then that's all it was.... what more do you want? Kick up a fuss and ask for what?I'm sure they don't do it on purpose

MrsSkylerWhite · 05/11/2021 10:56

Don’t understand why he was in a nappy at all: our nurseries didn’t have nap times for 4 year olds. I think that’s quite unusual?

katienana · 05/11/2021 10:57

I'd accept it as a one off but remind ds to ask to get it off. Why is he napping at 4? He will find the school day a struggle if he can't manage without a nap.

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SusannahHolmes · 05/11/2021 10:58

This happened to my ds once. The nursery apologized. Never happened again. No biggie.

Clementineapples · 05/11/2021 10:58

Huh? He’s 4? So will be at school next September. Why is he having nap times?
Honestly I’d just accept the apology and move on. I would assume a 4 year old wouldn’t need a nappy so presumably they did just forget.

withpeaceandlove · 05/11/2021 10:58

@MrsSkylerWhite he has additional needs and he doesn't cope without a nap. He was dry at nighttime initially but started to have accidents just before the summer holidays so that's when the nappy was introduced

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Newuser82 · 05/11/2021 10:59

No, I wouldn’t mention it’s a one-off either. Does he still nap at 4? Goodness you are lucky. I thought I was doing well with my almost three year old still sleeping in the day!

Scabetty · 05/11/2021 10:59

I understand the nappy at bed need but I would expect a 4 yo who is potty trained to want his nappy off when he was awake or to realise he was soiled. Mine would remove them and bin them as soon as they woke.
Tell his keyworker about his discomfort if you think it will help her remember.

withpeaceandlove · 05/11/2021 11:00

I don't need advice on him napping, thank you. Seems I was right to just accept that it was an accident, I won't mention it again.

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Newuser82 · 05/11/2021 11:00

Just seen your post above. That makes sense. Although I still hope my sons naps last a while yet 😀

WhenZoomWasJustAnIceLolly · 05/11/2021 11:01

Oh there are so many arseholes on mn, some four year olds need a nap and some sleep in a nappy. One of my four did and yes, he did struggle with the long school day but that was no reason to make him struggle sooner! He went to bed at 5.45pm after school and still had to be woken!

I think forgetting to take a nappy off as a one off is a minor thing. Not noticing that he had soiled it and leaving him in his own poo is another.

Is he usually unable to communicate that he’s soiled himself? If so op I would be wondering about additional needs. I say this with no judgement as one of mine was oblivious to soiling himself at that age and turned out to be autistic. Most four year olds would say something.

Scabetty · 05/11/2021 11:02

Obviously the additional needs should have been in original post. Feel free to ignore my reply. Have a good day Smile

WhenZoomWasJustAnIceLolly · 05/11/2021 11:02

Ah just seem your post re ALN. Actually I would say something and let them see how sore his bottom is.

MrsSkylerWhite · 05/11/2021 11:04

withpeaceandlove

@MrsSkylerWhite he has additional needs and he doesn't cope without a nap. He was dry at nighttime initially but started to have accidents just before the summer holidays so that's when the nappy was introduced“

Ah, that makes sense.

I would mention it: staff turnover at nurseries can be rapid. Is it possible a new member of staff hasn’t been told?

withpeaceandlove · 05/11/2021 11:05

He has ADHD and suspected ASD. It's quite a new thing to me so that's why I didn't mention it in the original post. Tbh he has always been quite blasé about soiling his nappy. He toilet trained at 3 and a half and even by then I'd have to smell the poo, he wouldn't tell me he'd done it. It was obvious as soon as I got home though, the nappy was huge and he was complaining about sore bum pretty much straight away.

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withpeaceandlove · 05/11/2021 11:08

@MrsSkylerWhite I did call them and his key person said he wanted to keep it on initially so she decided to leave it for a bit (I'd rather she'd just said no, it's time to take it off now but not a huge deal) and then she just got busy and forgot, she apologised. It was my mum who said I should send them pictures and put it in an email incase it happens again but I'm just going to trust them that it won't based off of the advice on here

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furbabymama87 · 05/11/2021 11:21

I used to work in a nursery and things like this happened sometimes, due to lack of communication, too many children for the number of staff and things like that. I'd accept their apology and keep an eye on it. If it happens again it's more of an issue. But I don't think there's a lot you can do about it as a one off.

Potterurotter · 05/11/2021 11:21

I wouldn’t be happy at all the nappy has been left so soiled that there are now sores. For the elderly that is a safeguarding under pressure sores and neglect. I would be questioning how in tune they are with my child’s needs and how observant - as a one off I’d address it but it cannot happen again

MrsSkylerWhite · 05/11/2021 11:22

Sounds nasty, poor little chap. Hope it clears up quickly.

Scabetty · 05/11/2021 11:24

Tell Nursery they must insist if he refuses due to his sensitivity - show photos. I used to be a 1:1 support for a child who would sit in a wet nappy till the cows came home if you let her. She would make a right fight at times but never got sores. Hope ds feels better soon Smile

Eileen101 · 05/11/2021 11:25

The poor boy to be ending up with sores.

Going against the consensus, I'd definitely say something. I have a good relationship with the nursery staff and I'd make them aware it had happened, accept their apology and just keep an eye that it doesn't happen again.
In relation to the bit about him asking to keep it on, I'd just say briefly at drop off and in a casual way, that even if he asks for it to stay on, you'd prefer it's taken off, even if it's just to prevent any further problems.

BaconMassive · 05/11/2021 11:29

LTN

Jojoanna · 05/11/2021 11:35

I’m appalled they didn’t notice , poor little chap !

makelovenotpetrol · 05/11/2021 11:46

My DD is gone 3 and isn't toilet trained yet and I fully imagine she will be in nappies at night gone 4. I'm sure it was an accident and his key person will have felt awful about it - especially when they see his sore bottom. I don't think it will happen again.

withpeaceandlove · 05/11/2021 11:47

Oh thank god, I thought I'd turned into one of those over dramatic ultra protective parents from the first few replies. I think I'll mention it verbally to his key person next week and show her a picture of how bad it is just so as it's fresh in her mind and she's less likely to forget again.

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