How do you pull other women up on 'small dick' jokes?

[Pileonsally]

I absolutely hate small dick jokes and cajt believe women still think its ok to make them!
Love my friends but a few of them like to make small dick jokes and small dick syndrome jokes. I find it so offensive.
Its not acceptable to comment on women's genitals so why is it acceptable to comment on men?

However I can never figure a way to challenge it? Don't want to seem the party pooper and half the time I agree with them that whoever they are calling is arrogant etc but dont think its ok to comment on dick size?

Do you ever pull anyone up on this and how do you do it ?

I really agree, bodyshaming is still nasty even without the additional factor of patriarchal beauty expectations. I hate it when people justify interpersonal cruelty on the basis it’s “kicking up”.

I’m not quite sure how to go about challenging it either, though.

I’ve never beats anyone do it in real life. If I did I think I’d tell them not to be a wanker.

On here it happens all the time and I just roll my eyes silently.

Always reflects on the person saying it far worse than the small dick owner. No one can help the size of their penis. Everyone can decide to not be a judgy nasty body shamer.

I don't pull anyone up on it tbh.

Men don't pull each other up on the misogyny, body shaming and rape jokes their friends make in fact they join in the majority of the time so I feel pretty meh about small dick jokes 🤷🏻‍♀️

Absolutely depends on context but I’d generally say something like “oh, that’s unnecessary/unkind/rude/a silly thing to say” - depends what was actually said.

Fully agreed though. Dick jokes, commenting on shorter mens’ heights… personal remarks are not justified.

at not acceptable to comment on women's genitals....I don't hear small dick jokes, and it seems like small fry compared to the background noise of people being called cunts and twats, and the general levels of bodyshaming women put up with. I hear a lot of comments about women's bits from men of a certain age teenagers

I agree and I usually say something like “Er, that’s not funny”

One of my first managers used to make these jokes and other sexual ones about a male intern (I was also an intern). It was horrible as she even did it in staff meetings. I ended up reporting her for sexual harassment to HR and both of we interns were moved to a different office.

It's not really bodyshaming as they presumably have no idea how big the penises in question actually are. It's more akin to 'she just needs a good shag'. Tasteless and lewd.

Stony face and ignore I'd say. Don't join in but nothing to comment on.

@ABCeasyasdohrayme

I don't pull anyone up on it tbh.

Men don't pull each other up on the misogyny, body shaming and rape jokes their friends make in fact they join in the majority of the time so I feel pretty meh about small dick jokes 🤷🏻‍♀️

So you think the answer is to do what shit men do? That’s your standard of morality?

Once the world is done with misogynistic jokes, I will start challenging small dick jokes.

@MrsTerryPratchett it probably does make some men with actually small penises feel self-conscious or self-loathing though.

I’m not saying it’s the most important issue around, I just don’t think there’s any reason to be unkind.

@MrsTerryPratchett
I think it is still body shaming. Similar to someone joking about a woman’s body hair or how loose her vagina is....the body part doesn’t have to be publicly visible for someone to shame you over it. It’s not like you can defend yourself either if it’s a part usually kept covered or clothed.

I only hear small dick jokes being made on the very very rare occasion.
Probably drowned out by the raucous laughter over womens bodies.

So you think the answer is to do what shit men do? That’s your standard of morality?

Nope, I don't do it, but I don't see why I should particularly care of someone else does. Definitely not enough to pull someone up on it.

Its not acceptable to comment on women's genitals so why is it acceptable to comment on men?

Happens a hell of a lot for something so unacceptable doesn't it.

If you are going to use the amount of comments about women's genitals and bodies as the ball park for something to be classed as being not acceptable, then how can you say it's considered acceptable when the comments are about men's genitals.

If you're being generous, there's about the same number of comments made about men as there is about women.

So why do you seem to thing society doesn't comment on women?

@FindingMeno

I only hear small dick jokes being made on the very very rare occasion. Probably drowned out by the raucous laughter over womens bodies.

I agree. Women generally aren’t safe to make these jokes, are they? Fear of male violence.

@ABCeasyasdohrayme

Not making sexist jokes or sexually harassing someone yourself isn’t good enough. You should pull people up no matter which sex is doing it otherwise it’s a double standard and.

It’s the same with not being racist yourself isn’t good enough, you should pull people up when they make racist jokes.

@Mummyoflittledragon absolutely

Frankly I don't.

The kind of women that think this is a productive way to bring men down a peg or two are also the kind of women I don't want to risk getting into a spat with. Misandry is not a big enough problem for me to risk being harangued by anyone.

Choose your battles, this isn't one of mine.

Surely you deal with it in the same way you'd deal with any other joke that you find offensive? "I don't find that very funny" or an unimpressed "hmmm..." or "that's not a joking matter" and then change the subject.

Or do what I do when someone makes a sexist, racist, or disablist joke - look confused and say "I don't get it..." then when they explain "I still don't get it, why is that meant to be funny?", repeat while they tie themselves in knots trying to justify their shitty 'joke'.

Not making sexist jokes or sexually harassing someone yourself isn’t good enough. You should pull people up no matter which sex is doing it otherwise it’s a double standard

When men start pulling each other up on their shitty and dangerous jokes and behaviour I will, until that time I'm not really fussed, otherwise it's women falling over themselves to not bodyshame men and being nice and kind about it all, and men still acting as they do regardless.

Other things like racism, homophobia etc I have and would pull people up on, this, not so much.

Every single aspect of the female body is analysed and criticised by the vast majority of men. And this is just normal male behaviour, on any day read any tabloid and the comments are front and centre. So until there is a movement to stop the constant pervasive criticism of every aspect of the female body, this issue is so far down my list of priorities, its non existent (no pun intended).

I honestly can't remember the last time I heard a small dick joke in real life. The only time I ever see/read them is on comments on twitter or online articles and even then it's usually made by a stranger who would probably thrive off the excitement of an argument or any attention. So I ignore them.

Do many of your friends make these jokes?

@ABCeasyasdohrayme

I don't pull anyone up on it tbh.

Men don't pull each other up on the misogyny, body shaming and rape jokes their friends make in fact they join in the majority of the time so I feel pretty meh about small dick jokes 🤷🏻‍♀️

Some men do! When my dh gets any kind of lewd jokes on whatsapp he messages back..not funny!! Also my ds has pulled people up in work for antiwomen jokes as his gf is hugely outspoken about this and he is very alert to it. Growing up my Dad hated bad language and if any of his friends used any he would just say Hey ! None of that! And all his friends totally watched their tongue when with him. When he died they told me they had so much respect for him for that. Could always just say..Now! Now! ..anything that just flags that its inappropriate.

If your friends are constantly making small dick jokes to the extent you are giving it this much thought maybe you need better friends. It's not a thing in my circle.

And other than refrain from making such jokes myself I don't feel responsible to protect male egos from them to a larger extent. As PPs said, I'll do it when I start to see men taking stances against misogynistic jokes.

The only small dick jokes I ever hear are told by men, not women