What’s your approach to other kids’ birthday presents?

[Rainallnight]

If your DC has been invited to their birthday party?

DD is in Year 1 and after no parties last year, the invitations are now coming in thick and fast.

For my own friends, I’m pretty thoughtful when it comes to presents and put a lot of effort into finding something that will really suit the person I’m giving it to.

But this doesn’t seem sustainable for all these school friend parties. For instance, DD has a party coming up soon with a boy I don’t know well at all. I thought about texting his mum to ask what he’s in to, but she doesn’t want that from the dozen people attending!

So do you just get something sort of generic?

At that age if it's a whole class party and my DC don't know them well I'll choose something age appropriate and generic around the £5 mark (recently I asked year 1 DS what a girl having a class party liked and all he could come up with was "pink" ). If it's a close friend I take DC to a shop and get them to choose something they think they'll like. With guidance...!

And just to add that DD just had her birthday party and actually it was really fun seeing what other people chose. She ended up with a few things I would never have picked for her that she loves, so I kind of take the approach that I'm willing to put up with the misses for those few hits. Duplicates are fine, they go in the present drawer for the next party!

Get a stash of stuff like colouring books, cheap picture books, sticker books etc.

Stick a fiver in a card.
Job done.

A book my same-age child has enjoyed, and a fiver in a card.

(I mean a new copy of a book recommended by my kid... Not their actual old copy!)

Money in a card

I used to pick a book for that age and give it to everyone that year. Now I am buying toys because I can’t think of a book. So I ask my daughter and then try and find a suitable toy. But we have fewer parties now so it’s manageable.

The book thing does work well for certain ages.

£10 in a card boom job done. Winner winner chicken dinner

Fiver in a card

Books! Can get really lovely ones, support local bookshop and if the kid has already or doesn't like it they can hand on easily.

15 in a card or the same value of toy shop voucher

My dc is in year 1 and has started having pocket money so a few £ in a card would definitely be appreciated as they now have started to understand the value of money and are saving towards certain Lego sets etc.
But actual gifts are great too. I always overthink them and get in a dreadful state if I can't find something appropriate! I always worry if they've already got that Lego set or book ...

@NanooCov

As someone else said upthread, I always get Lego. Great for both girls and boys, have an age guide on them, I don't know a single kid that doesn't like Lego and (bonus) my local supermarket always has small affordable sets in the toy aisle.

My kids never liked Lego, my GS does.

When my children were this age I used to buy a lot of age appropriate 'making things', they will usually get used up over holidays or rainy days!! ie https://www.amazon.co.uk/Galt-1005113-Toys-Space-Lab/dp/B07M7L1SLR/ref=mpssa1111?crid=8TQ6NA804K97&dchild=1&keywords=making+kit+for+6+year+old+boy&qid=1635810309&sprefix=making+kits+for+6&sr=8-11

@SaltySeaBird

Made the mistake of asking the Mum of a child DD didn’t know that well. She linked me something that was £30 and said her DD would love that and she’d put me down for it.

I messaged back and said it was slightly over budget and was there anything around the £10 mark perhaps and she linked something for £15 which I brought. She has blanked me on the school run ever since!

OMG!! 😂😂 She sounds like a cheeky cow.

we give as many pounds as the child's age ie £5 for 5 year old £8 for an 8 year old

over 10 it depends on how close they are, I stick with same rule if it's a kid that's among a bunch of friends or someone my kids might not invite that year (I don't ever fall for tit for tat when it comes to birthdays). for besties we are more generous.

sometimes there's a shared gift organised by someone (DS5's friend desired a bean bag for his 10th birthday so we all gave £5 towards it, the organiser suggested the amount) which is great.

occasionally I know what to get so we give an actual gift. it's the exception though

About £10 budget. I usually get one of following. I buy in cheap places.
Books 3 for £5 in Justbooks
Musical book - the ones with piano on side.
Painting by numbers set
Arr and craft esp any hobbicraft box set. Or paintable object set from cheaper shop.
Skippimg rope
Boxed game
Spiderman themed merch
Princess thened merch
Science set
Spy kit
Discover dinosaur in rock thing
Bubble based games / bubble shooter
Musical instrument eg tambourine
Pencil case.
Pencils set / crayola set
Colouring books

Money in a card isnt really a present for a child!

@NanooCov

As someone else said upthread, I always get Lego. Great for both girls and boys, have an age guide on them, I don't know a single kid that doesn't like Lego and (bonus) my local supermarket always has small affordable sets in the toy aisle.

My DS doesn't like Lego - he just never has liked Duplo or Lego

@GADDay

How hard can this be? I can think of 50 things.

🔹️Colouring book and felt tips - good quality ones
🔹️Personalised pencil case with funky pen.
🔹️Plant pot with sunflower seeds
🔹️A story book
🔹️Skipping rope - nice quality

Maybe not for dyspraxic/ dyslexic children who find fine motor control painful and very frustrating... all of those would be rather disappointing and a waste of money/ resources.

I did the £10 supermarket presents for about age 5 & 6. At 7 I began to put my £10 budget in the card for children I know less well. They have more clearly defined preferences by then and a grasp of the value of money. As they've got older, the parties get fewer and we know the children better I'm willing to pay a bit more and have a clearer idea of likes. We recently bought £15 remote control cars for a joint 9yo party. DS's 10yo BF got Minecraft themed clothing.

I'd love for there to be the end of the present at class parties. We've held parties for the fun of them, and the year that the whole class came and basically relocated the Toys R Us closing down sale to my house has meant that I've never cracked tidying the playroom since. Also 25 presents for other DS a week before Christmas was a logistical nightmare.
I'm glad that the scale of it has dropped with age!

A book, age appropriate jigsaw or orchard toys board game at that age. Something easily re-giftable if they already had it. Craft stuff only if I knew they were really into it. DC got lots of craft stuff and stationery that went to waste as it was barely used.

Once they were older I'd try and find out what they really liked or put money in a card along with a bag of sweets.

@NanooCov

As someone else said upthread, I always get Lego. Great for both girls and boys, have an age guide on them, I don't know a single kid that doesn't like Lego and (bonus) my local supermarket always has small affordable sets in the toy aisle.

My son doesn’t like Lego 😂🙈.

Don't do craft sets unless you know the child likes it. DD hates craft with a passion and was always given several sets from well-meaning parents and they were re-gifted more than once. It sounds an easy gift but it really is not.

For class parties I would go for Lego, ideally a local shop where you can get a gift recipe from or put some money in a card with some chocolate/sweets to unwrap. We got this a couple of times and DD found it equally great than getting a toy.

Books can be a mindfield, even in Y1 or so the reading level can vary a lot.