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Original poster

If you have a good degree from a good university but have NMW, why?

143 replies

SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 19:41

As per the question. Following on from another thread, but also because I have a relative who got a 1st with distinction from an RG uni who post children chose a NMW job because she said she couldn’t find anything else that fitted with childcare. (Although mostly, I think, because she wanted to be a SAHM, and couldn’t be arsed with the challenges of combining a career with motherhood but needed a little bit of extra money). I was a bit Shock, but it seems there are a lot of people like this, so I’m trying to understand why.

OP posts:
OzziePopPop · 31/10/2021 20:17

@SisforSoppy

I've seen extremely gifted women end up in crap jobs because of trying to balance family life

I have a friend who is a SAHM because her husband made it impossible to work. They both had full on career jobs, they needed a live in full time nanny…I obviously wasn’t privy to their discussions but the end result was that she ended up giving up a lucrative career because her useless DH wouldn’t even pull 5% of his weight. And trust me, my husband isn’t a naturally hands on dad…he’s had the ‘if you are asking me to choose between you and my career, the career will win’ conversation. No marriage is full proof.

It’s fool proof… hth
Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:18

Someone is going to have to tell me what hth means please.

OP posts:
EezyOozy · 31/10/2021 20:18

I’m disappointed that given her brain and the opportunities given to her (on a plate) that she hasn’t tried harder.

It's literally none of your business. She has kids and what sounds like a part time job she can manage ? Maybe she prefers this set up. Maybe she hasn't told you literally everything about herself. You sound over invested and a bit spiteful.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Doyoumind · 31/10/2021 20:18

@SisforSoppy

Someone is going to have to tell me what hth means please.
Hope that helps
Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:20

You sound over invested and a bit spiteful

Thanks for the input Hmm

OP posts:
ThelmaMadine · 31/10/2021 20:21

What do you earn, OP?

DaisyDozyDee · 31/10/2021 20:21

I have a PhD from a Russell Group university. In every respect other than salary, I’m in my dream job. It’s challenging, interesting and there’s real potential to make a difference. It’s related to a lifelong hobby. I’m given lots of autonomy to run things how I want to. The hours fit well around other responsibilities. There’s no commute. It’s genuinely a nice place to work and my managers are lovely people.
I used to earn a lot more in a job that was worse in many, many ways.
I work in a low paid job because the pay is the least important aspect of the job description for me at the moment.

00100001 · 31/10/2021 20:23

It's interesting how many people are citing childcare as their reasons. One again, it's women that are paying the price.

I'll bet next to zero men have this dilemma...

PeachesPumpkin · 31/10/2021 20:25

For my mental health and our family’s quality of life.
Also why does everyone assume marriages will end? Many people have happy marriages.

Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:28

@DaisyDozyDee I work in a low paid job because the pay is the least important aspect of the job description for me at the moment. I really admire that as a choice.

OP posts:
Eternallyfrazzled · 31/10/2021 20:29

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at OP's request.

mynameisnotmichaelcaine · 31/10/2021 20:29

I have a good degree from Oxford and I didn't work at all between the ages of 24 and 31. I wanted to be a SAHM so that my kids could benefit from my education in their crucial early years. I don't have a NMW job now, but I earn about a third of what my husband does, which is a bit depressing since we have basically the same degree.

Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:30

@PeachesPumpkin For my mental health and our family’s quality of life I really admire that as a choice.

OP posts:
Darklane · 31/10/2021 20:31

First from Cambridge
Work on a farm, prefer countryside & working with animals to town & working with people.

PinkForgetMeNot · 31/10/2021 20:32

You sound really bitchy op

Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:32

@ThelmaMadine I’m not how or why that is relevant. I earn considerably more than the NMW, but I’ve made many sacrifices along the way and am financially independent.

OP posts:
Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:33

@PinkForgetMeNot I’ll bear that in mindHmm

OP posts:
Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:34

Many people have happy marriages
And almost 1/2 of marriages end in divorce.

OP posts:
purpleme12 · 31/10/2021 20:43

I am just slightly above living wage
I did get a good degree I think
When I first came out of uni I did want to get a job to do with my degree. But I had interviews without any success. And I got really down with no job and living with my parents. So in the end I just needed a job, for myself. So I got a job.
Then because I didn't have chance to practice what my degree is in (it's that kind of thing) I lost my confidence really.
Well to be honest I just don't have enough confidence.
Honestly? I think that is the truth. I think if I had more confidence I'd have a better job

womaninatightspot · 31/10/2021 20:48

I also have a degree from a RG uni and earn awful money. I do housekeeping for a local hotel as I can work school hours. If you have to pay for childcare it doesn't make financial sense.

solania · 31/10/2021 20:50

I’ve got a PhD and am working for Real Living Wage.

In my case, ADHD, anxiety, imposter syndrome, depression and just a general inability to cope with high or even medium pressure environments.

I've found something I love, I work in the third sector so it doesn’t feel too bad to be getting a low wage as the charity can’t afford much more, but for a long time my low job status worried and upset me and I felt mortified that I couldn’t manage anything "better". I’m over that now, I love my work and will keep on at it until they run out of funding for me. Also it has helped me to find my feet and to realise that I am actually far more capable than I believed myself to be.

Original poster
SisforSoppy · 31/10/2021 20:55

@solania. Well done you. I’m pleased you are doing something that you enjoy and works for you.

OP posts:
DaisyDozyDee · 31/10/2021 20:57

[quote SisforSoppy]**@DaisyDozyDee* I work in a low paid job because the pay is the least important aspect of the job description for me at the moment.* I really admire that as a choice.[/quote]
It’s a huge privilege to be in a position to make that choice. I’m fully aware it’s down to some considerable luck along the way.

Scottishskifun · 31/10/2021 20:57

I think it depends on what they studied and actually if they have a passion or commitment to it.
My profession (science based) can be incredibly difficult to get into a degree isn't enough, a masters isn't either and a PhD may get you an interview!
If she knows she doesn't have any interest in working in that area then it's up to her really! What people want at 18 isn't the same as 30 in a lot of cases.

Amundo · 31/10/2021 21:01

[quote SisforSoppy]@Amundo thanks for the link, although when I put ‘good’ although I didn’t specify RG I’m talking in that league. I don’t think anyone will be surprised that a degree in frog grooming from the university of the arse end of no-where only leads to a NMW job.[/quote]
There are a percentage of even RG graduates who don't find graduate jobs, particularly in periods of recession. I myself am a RG graduate, and not in a frog grooming course, who happened to graduate in the early 1990s. A lot of my contemporaries never found graduate employment and it took me around 7 years without DC. It's easy to judge though, isn't it. The "wasted investment" comment is dreadful.