Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Do people not understand Halloween etiquette re trick or treating?

365 replies

Notcontent · 31/10/2021 17:44

I thought the rule was you only knock on doors where there are obvious decorations or lit pumpkins - basically an invitation to come?

We usually do it and have lots of sweets but I just didn’t feel up to it this year. Teen dd has gone out and it’s just me at home. No decorations at all. And some kids have just come knocking. Have now had to turn lights off at the font to make it look like no one is home!

OP posts:
Bouledeneige · 31/10/2021 18:43

I think when houses have previously been open to trick or treaters people make the assumption they are still. It's just an honest mistake. Some trick or treaters always take a handful - that's what kids and sugar are like. Chill.

HelenaJustina · 31/10/2021 18:43

The only thing we’ve got to hand out at our front door is COVID fed up!

CoffeeWithCheese · 31/10/2021 18:44

Dead round here - and it's normally a bit of a hub for the area in terms of the number of houses who go all out... no one's bothered this year.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Events & celebrations
PlausibleSuit · 31/10/2021 18:44

It’s a very patchily observed unwritten rule in my experience.

It definitely wasn’t the rule when I was growing up. Kids just knocked on everyone’s doors. And quite often smashed car windows if they didn’t get sweets (although I did grow up in a somewhat dodgy area).

ShinyHappyPoster · 31/10/2021 18:46

I think the lit pumpkin and decorations are fairly new additions. No-one ever had decorations or pumpkins outside when I was growing up and everyone knocked on everyone's doors.
Looking for pumpkins and decorated houses seems like another commercialisation/Americanisation so families following traditional UK customs or Scottish traditions wouldn't necessarily know.

Original poster
Notcontent · 31/10/2021 18:47

All quiet now!! I usually enjoy doing it - and we have fun carving pumpkins, decorating and buying a nice selection of sweets.

But both dd and I have had a very stressful few months for various reasons and all I wanted was a quiet evening.

OP posts:
DaisyDozyDee · 31/10/2021 18:48

Around here, the rule is definitely to only knock if there’s a pumpkin or some kind of decorations. Personally,
I’d like to see Halloween etiquette include ‘if you’re old enough to be out trick or treating without adult supervision then you’re too old to be trick or treating’.

RumHoney · 31/10/2021 18:48

My first year as an adult in my own house I bought sweets but didn't know the whole pumpkin/light code so got no visitors. I spent a couple of years with no visible lights (the main room I used was at the back of the house anyway), then just started to live normally and haven't had any rogue knockers. I even have my hall/porch light on because I'm expecting a Sainsbury's delivery in the next hour or so!

FallonBeesley · 31/10/2021 18:48

We’ve been tonight and we only visited decorated houses, I wouldn’t consider a porch light left on as an invitation to knock. We live a mile away from the village so unfortunately don’t get any trick or treaters even though I’d love to be handing out sweets!

ThirdElephant · 31/10/2021 18:50

Aaaaaand that's it. All the sweets are gone. 6 bags worth.

dootball · 31/10/2021 18:51

Surely the point of 'trick or treat' is that they either give you something or you play a trick? If you only ask people who want to give you stuff where do the tricks come in?

inpixiehollow · 31/10/2021 18:52

We have decorations up and have had around 30 so far, usually get more. The street seems very quiet. Have been shocked by how many children were taking whole handfuls of sweets though and no parents reminding them to just take one, I thought that was pretty standard?

Fallagain · 31/10/2021 18:52

I’ve got pumpkins and lights in front of the full sweet bowls on the door step and still people are knocking.

Its much quieter out and about this year.

SirChenjins · 31/10/2021 18:52

I’m bored with it now do have put the sweets outside with a sign saying “help yourself “. Going to have my spaghetti Bol, a glass of wine and another episode of Outlander which is utter shite but oh, so good.

Fallagain · 31/10/2021 18:53

@dootball

Surely the point of 'trick or treat' is that they either give you something or you play a trick? If you only ask people who want to give you stuff where do the tricks come in?
No, its they give you a treat or play a trick on you.
nordica · 31/10/2021 18:54

Same as you, I usually enjoy it and just needed a quiet weekend this year. I have no decorations up and had three lots of kids banging on the door yesterday evening 🙄 I think it is definitely an opt in, not opt out thing as it's very entitled of anyone to expect everyone will have bought sweets or wants to open the door to dozens of kids.

Tonight I'm being a grinch and used a cable tie to basically lock the front gate.

Littlemisspissypants · 31/10/2021 18:55

I just had a pair call on their way up the street, then call again on the way back down less than 2 minutes later. Told em where to go. Cheeky feckers.

SirGawain · 31/10/2021 18:55

I adopt the popular Mumsnet tactic; I don't open the door!

CrocodilesCry · 31/10/2021 18:57

We've decorated our house for the first time this year (we're usually out at a party on Halloween night so we've never done it before).

It's been so much fun, just had a group of nearly 20 kids turn up (with parents at the end of the drive) and a good dozen more separately.

They only seem to be knocking doors with decorations - can't see much point ringing on doors without any decorations as they're unlikely to have any treats in!

bigbluebus · 31/10/2021 18:58

I haven't had any decorations for years (since the DCs were small) but usually buy in sweets and leave the outside light on. Usually get quite a lot of callers. This year we've carved a pumpkin and we've had 3 lots of children - only one lot we knew. It's very quiet around here this year. I've heard more children around outside but they didn't knock so maybe they were just going to pre arranged houses this year.

AbandonedCharacter · 31/10/2021 18:58

@dootball

Surely the point of 'trick or treat' is that they either give you something or you play a trick? If you only ask people who want to give you stuff where do the tricks come in?
Trick or treak is from America and I think you do get a trick if you don't hand out sweets.

In Scotland - at least in my part - you go guising and tell a joke or sing to get sweets.

paulhollywoodshairgel · 31/10/2021 19:00

That's the rule around here and the schools push it too. You only visit lit decorated house with pumpkins. I think this is fair enough and my 2 always come home with enough sweets for a small army 😂

TrashyPanda · 31/10/2021 19:01

No kids here, but I love Halloween, so I do have decorations up and lanterns out the front. Not everyone does a “turn”, which was obligatory when I was wee, and trotted around with my turnip lantern

But things change. Back in my youth, we only went to folk we knew fairly well, but with lots of parents both out at work all day, folk don’t have the same opportunities to get to know their neighbours. So I’ve made a pint of saying to people in the street that if their children are out trick or treating, then we’d love them to call on us.

I had such fun out guising when I was a kid. And I’m a bit sad guising is now trick or treating. But on the plus side, pumpkins are a hell of a lot easier to carve than neeps!

clatterclatter · 31/10/2021 19:01

Lots of trick or treaters here, noticeably ruder than usual and lots of rifling through the sweets which feels a bit grim at the moment

TirednWorried · 31/10/2021 19:01

its howling a gale and raining stair rods here.not maNY KIDS OUT