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Original poster

Was this normal in the 90's

460 replies

sparklybin · 31/10/2021 08:10

I'm trying to sort in my head some of the things my parents did when me and siblings were growing up to see what was normal and was was not.

When my parents used to go into town ie the high street, if they had their shopping to do or something like a bank appointment they would drop us at the toy store and leave us there playing with the toys until they'd finished and then they'd come back. Probably used to leave us for about an hour but I'm not sure if it was longer. We were about 4/5 when they started doing this
I can't imagine doing this. It was early 90's though so I don't know if it was normal or not.

OP posts:
libertyfarmboots · 01/11/2021 21:19

My sister was born in 1991 and I never saw this. I was a baby right at the beginning of the 80s and it was normal to leave prams outside shops though. My mum has spoken a few times about coming out of the local shop to find me with a mark across my face and how freaked out she was by it.

mintdream · 01/11/2021 21:22

1980’s, Divorced parents - DM never left me anywhere but DF was the opposite:

-Regularly dropped off my friends and I at the local swimming pool when we were aged 8-10 years and left us there for hours. He’d bring us sandwiches for lunch and then leave again until late afternoon. We loved it but when I think about it now it’s shocking.

  • left outside the pub in the car (from age 7-8) for around 1 to 3 hours and he’d bring me a lemonade and nuts. I’d have nothing to do but stare out the windows, no toy or books
  • would leave me home alone for hours at a time (from about age 7) while he supposedly went to the rubbish tip or DIY shops (he did a lot of DIY). I never questioned it but in hindsight he must have been doing other things too.

He would drink and drive with me in the car too so I guess he thought the above was nothing. He thinks he’s been a great DF too Hmm

BelleandSeb · 01/11/2021 21:24

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

No- locked in the car whilst my dad was in the betting shop though
Me too! In the 80s. For what felt like hours!
caspersmagicaljourney · 01/11/2021 21:26

@user1486915549

Don’t worry In the 1950’s it was quite normal to leave us on the pub doorstep with a bag of crisps 😂
It was still considered normal in the 60s and 70s as children weren't allowed in pubs.
keffie12 · 01/11/2021 22:04

It was most certainly not normal and neither was it in the 80s when my eldest 3 were born.

I wouldn't have gone in any shop if I wasn't allowed in with the pram/pushchair.

They stopped leaving babies in prams outside shops in the 60s which was when I was born.

twocatsandtwokids · 01/11/2021 22:16

I don’t think this was normal in the 80s, or 90s! Never happened to me anyway!!

CloudPop · 01/11/2021 22:17

Not remotely normal in my experience

Fatredwitch · 01/11/2021 22:19

My children were born in 1978 and 1986, so they were little in the 80s and 90s. We were just as protective as today's parents, and wouldn't have dreamed of dumping them alone in shops or libraries whilst we went off somewhere else. I didn't know anyone else who would have done it either.

When they were babies, we carried them round shops in a sling.

However, when I was growing up in the 50s and 60s, it was normal for babies to be left in prams outside shops. Apparently, when I was a baby, my dad took me to the village shops and returned home without me. When Mum said "Where's the baby?", he remembered that he had left me in a shop doorway. Fortunately, when he ran back I was still there.

sotiredofthislonelylife · 01/11/2021 22:20

@keffie12

It was most certainly not normal and neither was it in the 80s when my eldest 3 were born.

I wouldn't have gone in any shop if I wasn't allowed in with the pram/pushchair.

They stopped leaving babies in prams outside shops in the 60s which was when I was born.

Absolutely not true, unfortunately!! I had babies in late 60’s and 70’s, and regularly had to leave them outside shops. Maybe where you lived it was different.
Farcry66 · 01/11/2021 22:26

My dad used to leave us in a big toys r us store when he went to the cash and carry. I think it must have been around 1992 ish. Apparently kids weren't allowed in the cash and carry and he thought we would be bored if we waited in the car!

Restzol · 01/11/2021 22:31

1975 age 3 I used to walk across a small cul de sac to the school where I would meet my sister. I’d also go round the block to knock on my friend’s door to play. My mum would call me home by leaning out the back window and shouting for me!

Age 10 I would get dropped at the library while parents did a shop at kwik save. Bliss.

Age 17 (1989) working in Woolworths I was confronted with two hysterical children who had been left alone in the store in the toy section and had panicked. This was unusual though and very much frowned upon.

Despite my parents laissez faire approach to play dates age 3, they wouldn’t let me go to the park alone age around 10 nor get public transport as a teen!

Livinthedream84 · 01/11/2021 23:04

Never happened to me but I’m sure if my mum knew about it she would have done! Any excuse to get rid of us for a bit haha

sweetgingercat · 01/11/2021 23:29

We were locked in the car for ages while my mother went off to do the shopping. We'd get so bored, we'd start arguing and it would end up in tears. We were never left outside the pub with a bottle of coke and a packet of salt and shake crisps like some people seem to have been.

Barmychick · 01/11/2021 23:35

We used to roam woodlands until the chase murders.

TurnUpTurnip · 01/11/2021 23:42

I was a child in the 90s my mum had 6 of us and was a single parent but nope she never did this, However we did use to walk home from primary school alone and was expected to sit in the garden until she returned (she wouldn’t give a key) I remember being sat there for hours some days

IncorrigibleTitmouse · 01/11/2021 23:43

We were often left places when we were kids in the late 80s / early 90s. We were often just left in the car when Mum went to do the weekly shop.

My Dad had us every other Friday night and all day Saturday and used to leave us in the car outside his work until 12 because he worked Saturday mornings. Obviously no harm ever came to us but we were SO bored. No one bothered about it.

GeorgiaGirl52 · 02/11/2021 00:05

It was very normal. In the 60s I was left in the toy store while my parents shopped in the grocery store at the other end of the street.
In the 80s I left my two girls in the toy section of the warehouse store while I went to the grocery section and did the weekly shop -- about an hour.
There were two rules in the 60s and 80s - Do Not Break Anything and Do Not Leave the building.

waterrat · 02/11/2021 00:16

I had this ! My dad would leave us in wh smiths while he did his shopping on thr High Street. We would just stand and read the books and comics. We would have been 7 or 8. Many many times as well we were left in pub gardens while adults went indoors.

waterrat · 02/11/2021 00:16

I was born in 77 so that was mid to late 80s

Granjeanne · 02/11/2021 00:16

We were left in the pub garden with lemonade and crisps. We saw this as a treat, not a punishment. Nobody considered the possibility of abduction! This was in the 1960s. Either the world was safer then, or our parents were reckless. Not sure which.....

thisgardenlife · 02/11/2021 00:21

I had young children in the 1980s and would never have left them alone to play in a shop. It was definitely not normal round our way.

GobletofFiyah · 02/11/2021 00:36

I was going to say no but then I remembered being left in the ikea 'cinema' which was just a dark room with cartoons on a big screen and maybe a few soft play bits? Definitely no staff and loads of kids in there Grin

Would have been 96 when I was 7?

PurpleFlower1983 · 02/11/2021 05:13

@GobletofFiyah

I was going to say no but then I remembered being left in the ikea 'cinema' which was just a dark room with cartoons on a big screen and maybe a few soft play bits? Definitely no staff and loads of kids in there Grin

Would have been 96 when I was 7?

Oh this has triggered a memory for me of something similar! Haha!
Fantail2018 · 02/11/2021 06:29

Not sure about the 90's (I was a teenager) but here in 2021 NZ pools allow you to leave kids once they are 9 (I don't but other parents do including on playdates).

Library has signs re no under 8's unsupervised but having a few ex-librarians in family that is due to some fairly undesirable people hanging out in library (it is really hard to trespass people from a public facility). They emphasised that you really would not want to leave kids alone as some people target the childrens section.

maysiemay · 02/11/2021 09:23

We used to be dumped at local cinema. They never watched us go in or check what was on. Saw some random films not always suitable. Some space thing that made no sense. Not allowed in one week when it cost more for some reason. We would be picked up a couple of hours later. I was the eldest and i had my little sister with me and 2 friends were left with us while our parents disapeared. I was probably about 8-9. It happend for months every weekend. It was exciting when everything went right but scary. no money for snacks. This was about 1980-1

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