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Im just fuming with a utter timewaster

28 replies

Fishies · 30/10/2021 16:26

Get a cuppa its a long story but views please

Why would you waste someone's time so much
My nan passed a few weeks ago and im clearing her house some of those items im clearing are toiletries gift sets
She messagd me 3 weeks ago will I hold so many for her till the 29th . I asked for a deposit she never paid it and had different excuses I offered to collect it on my way to school and back was never in, She didn't turn up with it either when arranged to come to the house.

Husband told me I should have more trust so I did she sounded quite legit you know busy working ect and gave me her house address
Anyway in-between then and the 29th she has messaged numerous times asking how much she owes and then my address I've told her many times it already .We arranged she would pick up at 10 yesterday. I messaged her at 8.45 to say the bag I have them in wasn't very strong she may want to bring one 5 mins later she said she's got up late so cant collect this morning and she collect in the afternoon as shes not rushing around . Ive already told I was going out so no she couldn't but if its OK ill bring them to her at 10am still because I was going out with the kids somewhere else . She was like no thats not OK then she says I don't have the money yet, she literally lives a 10 min walk away so she says oh I can't help getting up late blah blah right so she then arranged for 5pm she then messages at 1pm am I home, I get home a bit later and message to say im home now she then replies can I bank transfer and collect monday errrrr no I've told her numerous times im not holding them any more than the 30th. I've given her many options to collect and she either picks up in the evening or by 6pm today (30th) at the latest as im home all day . She then brings more excuses out about working evenings and nights in a care home and shes busy and its affected her body not physically, she then asks me to meet her in town i said no why would I go town with my kids when your a 10 min walk from me.
Sorry but i work i have 2 children a family life tyring to organise a 60th party and clear my nans house out .walking to town i am not doing .Anyway I left it as a simple 6pm today(30th) is the latest that gives you enough time to get the cash and come get them. I will not be offering to deliver though i am busy making a birthday cake. If she work nights I understand if she's sleeping but she told me she was off yesterday and didn't start till 10pm so god knows why she didn't turn up then. Anyway late last night knowing for sure she's not coming I made what I thought was a draft listing getting ready to readvertise them ..... Facebook does not do draft listings! Lessson learnt !! It went live and I put on it due to being let down with a silly timewaster with ridiculous excuses anyway she saw it . Awkward. And messaged why have I relisted I did apologise for relisting though I didn't know i had, but I told her I don't belive shes coming she replied we definelty want them if I say I want them then I want them.( Well if you wanted them that much then you make sure you have the money and you make the time to collect them surely right) she says she will try to get her friend to pick them up

So I said well come after you finish work this morning then or up till 6pm today after that they will be relisted she then replied saying shes gone food shopping going home and will be up later its now 4.25 and ive heard nothing. I mean shes probably asleep but I still don't belive shes coming. And its becoming comical now really. Last time I listen to my husband saying have some trust.

I really couldn't give a damn anymore if she doesn't take them ive others already interested they will sell as ive made £150 on them all for my nans chosen charity there was about 40 gift sets god bless her heart. I just have made myself feel so sick and stressed by this .

If youve read this far then well done!!

OP posts:
Leavisite · 30/10/2021 16:29

Honestly, OP, I think you're almost equally complicit in going along with this nonsense for so long. When she didn't immediately pay the deposit you asked for, you should have just relisted them then.

Are these toiletries worth a lot of money? It seems like endless faff.

mrsbyers · 30/10/2021 16:32

Donate them to a charity shop - does your nans charity have shops ?

HoardingSamphireSaurus · 30/10/2021 16:32

Sell them. You've been too understanding, your DH is wrong. Let them go to whoever it is on FB that wants them!

lemonyfox · 30/10/2021 16:33

Sell them to someone else, stop responding to her, not sure why you've entertained her for so long tbh!

VimFuego101 · 30/10/2021 16:33

Just block her and sell to the next person.

PleaseGoDontGoAgain · 30/10/2021 16:34

Fahckin Ell. What a palaver! Yeah I woulda sold it to the next one much sooner than you did

bestcattoyintheworld · 30/10/2021 16:35

Round my way, people just leave things listed until they've been collected. First person there gets them.

hellcatspangle · 30/10/2021 16:38

I had this on marketplace the other week, made the mistake of being flexible and holding onto something for a week, for someone who wanted it delivered, then she messed me about for three days promising to pay me "in ten min" and not being in when I was free to deliver. I actually think she didn't even want the bloody thing and was just messing me about for fun. Twat.

Fishies · 30/10/2021 16:39

I don't think so no its psp society i mean shes already donated her Brain for research but she wanted some belongings sold and money to be donated also

OP posts:
Fishies · 30/10/2021 16:44

I know i feel a fool . I ain't listening to the husband again put it that way! I've just done some snooping shes now back online so she must be awake so it'll be interesting to see if she turns up however I don't even want her to now. I've not wasted the time today staying in as I had to make my mums birthday cake anyway but its just so f####ing annoying I've been talking to some friends and shown them the messages I wish I could like green screen it all here. Obviously you need to read the messages to get the full picture of the palava really
I've had no trouble selling any of the other sets everyone's turned up no ones let me down but this last lot ugh just what a twat. And they were the very 1st sets I even listed

OP posts:
SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 30/10/2021 16:58

I don’t think you are a fool - I think you were being a decent person, @Fishies - and I think you are right to set a deadline and stick to it.

You are doing a really good thing by selling these gift sets so the money can go to charity, and I’m sure your Nan would be proud.

Fishies · 30/10/2021 17:04

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius

I don’t think you are a fool - I think you were being a decent person, *@Fishies* - and I think you are right to set a deadline and stick to it.

You are doing a really good thing by selling these gift sets so the money can go to charity, and I’m sure your Nan would be proud.

I set a deadline but im so tempted to block her now and get rid of her ! but I also made a listing to relist them I mean I feel so guilty about that also if that was me I'd say to the seller get lost i don't want to give you my money after that . I hate shes got the address now aseell though
OP posts:
AlCalavicci · 30/10/2021 17:22

Good grief there is no way I would of put up with all that messing about !

Either block her and re-advertise them and stick to your guns regarding price / deposit / pick up
or donate to a charity you know your nan would like

RightOnTheEdge · 30/10/2021 17:28

Don't feel guilty OP! You have been very patient.
She doesn't feel bad for messing you around when you are grieving.
Just block her and relist them.
Sorry for your loss Flowers

Gazelda · 30/10/2021 17:31

Oh, absolutely re-list.
She's taken you for a fool. Show her you're not.

Clickncollect · 30/10/2021 17:34

Bloody hell OP, life is too short to be messed around by this chancer. Block her and relist immediately! This is utter madness.

Clickncollect · 30/10/2021 17:35

Oh and very sorry for your loss x

Fishies · 30/10/2021 17:39

Thank you all do I wait for the 20 minutes or do I just block her now!

OP posts:
imasurvivor2 · 30/10/2021 17:53

If you don't even want her to have them block her now!!Grin

LagneyandCasey · 30/10/2021 18:04

I'm afraid you have to harden up if you sell online. There are a lot of absolute piss takers out there. Never offer to hold items for more than a day, even if you get the sob stories. Make it clear in your listing if people don't turn up it will be offered to the next in line.

Mamette · 30/10/2021 18:11

You’ve done your absolute best with her so I think it’s fine to block her now.

Sorry to hear about your Nan passing away.

SixQuidGames · 30/10/2021 18:13

Fucking hell, that was hard going.

IncessantNameChanger · 30/10/2021 18:17

Agree that you have to state your boundaries in line one of your listing. I get this. Collection in a remote village only. Always the same person saying yes who cant drive and has no one to collect for her. I give her my address and then pass her over on day four. She will never come. Like your CF, there is no intention of collecting. Ever.

WeAreTheHeroes · 30/10/2021 18:20

Only hold anything with payment upfront. This woman didn't pay you a deposit and you've been bending over backwards when you're the seller: it makes you look desperate. Block her and sell them to someone who does turn up with the cash. If she's not been round so far she's not going to now.

Siriisatwat · 30/10/2021 18:22

I would have blocked her long ago. I never hold items and if someone doesn’t turn up with no good excuse, then I give them one more chancre. They don’t turn up again I block and relist. I don’t do it out of the goodness of my heart, and I have a life too.

Sorry about your grandmother Flowers