What time do your 5 year olds go to bed?

[Lopsider]

Just that really. DS is 5.5 and only just went to sleep despite going to bed just after 7.30. He is home educated so no school to get up for - tends to wake up around 8am most days.

But I feel like he goes to sleep so late compared to other kids his age! MIL was appalled and thought he should be in bed at 6.30 .

He will quite happily go to bed at 7.30 after a decent bedtime routine but he reads, plays etc until he eventually falls asleep around 9.

He's fine during the day but I'm still worried it's too late/not enough sleep.

Up at 6/7am and bed at 7/7.30. If he's happy to go up and read etc until he falls asleep and he's not tired then I really see no issue!

I think I'm panicking because PIL are coming to stay this week and I can't bear the judgement.

It's to do with the total number of hours sleep a child needs. My almost 5'yr old needs about 11 hrs so she goes to sleep around 8 and naturally wakes up around 7 sometimes earlier, sometimes later. So if yours goes to sleep at 9 and wakes at 8am that sounds fine to me x

Around 8.30pm.

He’s never done the 7-7 thing in his life, not even close.

I feel I should put him to bed later in that case but it's almost like he needs the wind down time alone before he falls asleep

Yes I find mine (8.30) has a very specific fall asleep time. So if he goes to bed at 7 he’ll want me to lie next to him and it will take an hour and a half to fall asleep (til 8.30).
If we take him to bed at 8.25, he’ll take 5 mins to go to sleep, and we can sneak out almost straight away. That’s just the time he falls asleep.
Sometimes during school holidays it ends up being more like 9pm.

Sounds normal OP my DS4 tends to fall asleep between 8/8.30pm and he's up at 7am for nursery. Maybe your MIL put her kids to bed that early back in the day, but things change. It's hard but just ignore, ignore, ignore xx

My youngest drops off as soon as his head hits the pillow (4) and he goes between 6:30/7 and awake between 6-6:30. My oldest (6) will go to bed at 7 but takes an hour/ hour and a half to drop off. He talks to himself and remembers all the important things he's forgotten to tell me during the day. He wakes up by 6/ 6:30 too. No matter what time he goes down he takes ages even if it's later- we tried changing! Always awake at the same time too!! So keep it earlier so he drops off earlier!

Lights out about 7.15 and asleep within 20 mins. Wakes up about 6.45. If she doesn’t get enough exercise she struggles to get to sleep.

My daughter goes to bed around 8 for story and then can take up to 1.5 hours to fall asleep but normally asleep by 9. She wakes up about 8am. Shes always been a night owl but still normally gets 11 hours so happy with that.

I'm happy if he's asleep at 8, we're fairly chaotic so often it will be later than that. I think notions of children being in bed at a particular time are a bit old school, surely we know that children are different just as adults are. I feel the judgement from my parents who are very much get them into bed for 6.30 and the evening's yours.... But my mum always complained how early we were up in the mornings!

Mine always go at 7.30 but are allowed to read as much as they want. Oldest is lights out and asleep by 8 but is a 6am riser, 6yo regularly still awake at 8.45. I've given up tbh, he will usually sleep until 7 if not woken by sibling but I think he's a natural night owl. He just sits and reads usually so I leave him to it.

4.5 yr old goes at 9pm. Then straight to sleep within 5 mins. If she goes any earlier she's still awake until 9pm.
Wakes at 7am.

Should be 7.30pm, more like 8-8.30pm

Mine is very similar, it just seems to be her natural pattern. I think the people who put their kids to be at 6.30 just end up with them being up for the day at 6am instead.

Around 8pm, sometimes a little earlier. We’re usually having tea at 6:30. Plus there are after school activities too. And on the days I’m in work the kids are in after school club until 5:30. Your PIL sound a bit bonkers.

It was between 7&7.30 when DD2 was 5. But the school bus left at 8am.

It was 6.45 for DD1.. but her school started at 7.30!

8pm. Wakes between 6 and 7

My 5 year old goes up to bed at 7:30 then after teeth brushing/story etc. is usually asleep by 8:15 although it can sometimes take her much longer (she has always had trouble falling asleep). Last night for instance it was after 9 although I suspect that back to school nerves were at play.

She is up at 7 most days.

She also still wakes up at least once a night.

You’ve chosen to home Ed

You’re going to need to toughen up around judgement and start believing in your parenting choices

I also home Ed and bedtime is seasonal.
So around winter solstice bed time is about 1900 and spread about to half past one the evening start to lengthen again.
Summer solstice is more like 2130 with 2030 being more common closer to the equinox

I didn’t deliberately plan it to be round those dates, but have found bed time to be much easier and more pleasant if we adapt to the seasonal changes

No school

Gives you thee freedom to respond to their needs

DS is 4.5, and has always gone down at about 8pm. DH can sometimes get him into bed by 7:30, DS can sometimes waylay me and delay bedtime until 8:30, but it’s almost always that sort of range. Wakes up at 7:30 in the morning with no difficulty.

Mine goes to bed at 9pm and wakes up between 7.30-8am (we live next door to school so we don't need to get up early.)

We are sometimes still eating dinner at 6.30.

Just ignore your PIL - there's nothing inherently better about early bedtimes as long as everyone gets enough sleep (12h is just an average, some DC will only need 10, some will need 13).

Mine has needed 10 hours a night since he was 3. He’s got to be asleep at 8.30pm as he always wakes up at 6.30am.

If those times work for your DS, it doesn’t matter.

@thewhatsit. DD is/was the same. I always wondered how parents got their kids to sleep at 7. My one just used to laugh at me.