Would you have a child with this man?

[BasinHaircut]

He is your long term partner- husband even.

Says he will have a child ‘for you’ because you want one but doesn’t actually want children at all?

Nope

Not unless you're prepared to either function as a single parent, or for him to bail out and for you to actually BE a single parent.

Nope - he would leave everything to do with the child up to you.

Has he ever wanted children? Did you not want children and you’ve changed your mind?

No, and I wouldn't marry him either. Deal breaker.

No
And if it were me, I’d have to leave. Being a mother was too important to me.

No. But you are not me, and choices are not made in a vacuum.

No, it's not fair on you, him or - most importantly - the child.

Nope.
You would in effect be parenting single handedly which in turn will IMO cause resentment and arguments in the long term. This is not an ideal situation to be bringing a child up.

To the outside at least, anyone who has ever met the woman knows that she has always wanted children. Plural.

To the outside, to anyone who has ever met the man it would be obvious that he has never wanted children. In my opinion.

God no.

A child should be wanted by both parents.

Hell to the no would I

No. It’s a big commitment. At any bumps in the road he may well say “you wanted this but l didn’t”

No way. Why would a person who desperately wants children be with someone who desperately doesn't?

No, chances are you will be left with everything as he will say he didn't want the commitment of children. Ive known women in this situation, they have ended up bringing up their child alone.

Parenting is hard enough when you both want a child.

No. Wanting a child is something you have to be 100% sure about before you start trying to conceive, as sure as you would need to be about, let’s say, getting a tattoo on your forehead. Poor child that was only wanted by 1 parent.

Oh this isn't you then?

No @FlibbertyGiblets not me but a friend is going through this and it makes me so mad/sad for her.

Yes, if the relationship was generally okay, and you made it clear to him that the dc would be a joint responsibility.

Definitely not. Massive red flag.

No where is the joy in that? He may come around or he could moan every time child cries refuse life a finger and expect you do everything because you decided have baby.

He's already laid the groundwork to check in and out of family life as he sees fit. So she can't complain if he is of no help during those long nights, appointments, changing nappies etc. If she's happy to basically do it all alone then so be it. I wouldn't but at least he's being upfront so she can't complain later if he turns out to be useless.

No and if I wanted kids I would find someone who also wanted them

The kids will pick up that he didn’t want them

Yes I would if I desperately wanted a child. I know plenty of men in couples with kids like that