Why do people develop an old person mentality when they reach a certain age?

[YanTanTethera01]

I am friends with a couple, she is 50 and he's 65. My girlfriend has always been very young-minded, active, trendy etc. but in the past two years she's let her hair grow grey, cut it short, joined activity groups for older people, moved with her husband into a retirement complex and has an attitude of "I'm old, I'll say and do what I want". Both still work in good and enjoyable jobs but aspire to be retired and get positively envious of people who retire early and travel the country in a camper van.

I'm more of an age with her husband but find myself drifting away from them because I can't stand this grump old pair they're turning into. I wonder if it's because I have young family that keeps me young but at some point, I'll also "turn".

@SukiPook

Good on you *@SoloISland*! Keep evading capture!

Oh I will... lol. I arrived at my new rental a few years ago in the Connemara mountains to be greeted by a lady who grazed sheep in the next field, A retired nurse at a sheltered housing place in the nearest town, When she heard it was an older person coming to live up there she actually went to her former boss and LO! There was a place ready for me... I made the actual move out here very fast before they could more than start that idea here. Less then two weeks from viewing to arriving.

Our ferry is an open 12 seater curragh and that deters them. The priest confided in me that he hates coming over to say mass.. In case something happens and YOU CAN"T GET OFF.. Wanted me to take that over and I am qualified.

I always loved the crossing, Bliss.
Folk out here live long. The man who lived where I live now lived to A HUNDRED. And one headstone is a lady who lived to 104

After six years they don't worry or bother me any more... lol

And I am sure
that the more active you are the fitter you stay and the longer you last

@YanTanTethera01

I am friends with a couple, she is 50 and he's 65. My girlfriend has always been very young-minded, active, trendy etc. but in the past two years she's let her hair grow grey, cut it short, joined activity groups for older people, moved with her husband into a retirement complex and has an attitude of "I'm old, I'll say and do what I want". Both still work in good and enjoyable jobs but aspire to be retired and get positively envious of people who retire early and travel the country in a camper van.

I'm more of an age with her husband but find myself drifting away from them because I can't stand this grump old pair they're turning into. I wonder if it's because I have young family that keeps me young but at some point, I'll also "turn".

Getting older is still you. With knobs on.

Heaven forfend you tie your identity to your hair.

SoloISland I love the sound of your life!

@SoloISland is an inspiration

“Old people mentality”

Perhaps your friend is fed up of conforming to unrealistic beauty standards and spending time and money on maintaining her hair to please other people.

Looking forward to retirement and travel sounds reasonable enough. Perhaps by moving into this complex early they can release a bit of equity that will allow them to do this. Also, he is quite a bit older, and they may have made this decision based on his expectations of future health and support needs.

I’m 50 and decided to go grey, it’s no reflection on my mental state, other than I’ve decided to stop pretending that my hair is a colour that it’s not, for many, many reasons.

You sound a wee bit judgemental, OP, I hope it’s not old age creeping up on you…?

[quote theDudesmummy]@SoloISland is an inspiration[/quote]
I also think @SoloISland sounds great, but it’s interesting to see how well-received her anecdotes about her life as a late 70-something single woman on a remote island are on this thread, compared to a recent ‘rural living’ thread on which several posters implied she was irresponsible and dangerous.

They should put a character like that in Motherland, everyone else in their 20s/30s, maybe early 40s and then the oldest mum on the block

They are all in their mid 40s (the actress who plays Meg is pushing 50). Primary school parents are just older these days!

I have tried to let my hair go grey, stopped dyeing after March 2020. It just has a few streaks! I thought I'd get the lovely silvery locks cascading down my back. But no matter, I'm leaving it as it is now, very dark brown with silver threads (after thirty years of auburn, I'd forgotten what my real hair colour was!)

They were on Saga tours asap and looking for pensioner specials the day they hit 60.

I used to laugh, when my MIL asked for pensioners portions! Now, I find I can only eat half what I used to for a main meal - if a restaurant offers smaller meals, I have one!

It's a matter of being practical; nothing to do with attitudes to life! (We get down on the floor and play with our small grandchildren regularly!)

@Steeple yes I read that thread, that is where I first met SoloISland (and I now follow her blog). Some people were quite odd on it. I live rurally but not remotely, but I find her lifestyle inspiring although I would not want it for myself, if you see what I mean.

This chimes with something I've noticed. I'm nearly 62, mountain bike a lot, walk, feel fitter than ever. I'm lucky enough to have retired.
I volunteer at a local community library and I sometimes horrified how 'old' some of the other volunteers act and think. I try not to say fuck in front of them, and do all the clambering and lifting.
I'm frightened that one day I'll wake and be like them! FWIW my hair is grey and messy and I live in jeans and a T-shirt as I always have given half a chance.

Ah, nothing to do with small appetites and everything to do with parsimony. The pil’s pensions were huge but fil started saying, “I’m only a pensioner” whenever a bill hoved into view….

They availed themselves of every discount. There was one where instead of a bus pass you could have travel tokens, which the Pil used to take taxis to the airport for saga holidays. Good job that system ended: fancy councils stumping up for that