What is the secret to a happy life?

[Washeduponthebeach]

Interested to know what has worked for you and why. How you have changed your approach or what life events have prompted a different outlook!

Don't sweat the small stuff.

The joy of small things

Leaving a miserable marriage which I stayed in for the kids.
Finding work that fits around family life.
Financial stability.
Good health & being active.
Friends, good social & emotional connection with others & feeling part of a community.

If I want to do something, try new thing, learn a new skill.... I just do it. So long as my actions have no negative affects on others, I just do stuff.
No regrets, just learnings to change my approach next time.
I keep my family close, have few true friends.

No life is totally happy. It begins with liking yourself though. It makes dealing with life’s crap a bit easier.

Be grateful for what you have got.

Stay away from idiots 😅😅

For me, it was realising that twat ex wasn’t going to change, shitty employer wasn’t going to change, and as a direct result of those two facts, my shitty life wasn’t going to change. The only thing that could change was me. So I left the fuckwit, applied for a new job, still crap, but with training opportunities that I took full advantage of, and clawed my way up. Took years and was bloody hard, in fact I went backwards before I went forwards, but my life is unrecognisable now.

Don't compare yourself to others
Lower your expectations
Count your blessings

Find a job you like, financial security, good relationship, having children, being able to go on holiday.
The thing I’m lacking is time to myself at the moment, that would make me happier

Having a firm religious belief. Being able to ask God for support through tough times, and knowing that life is only temporary. Eternal happiness awaits after it.
Meanwhile, here on earth: having loving relationships with family and friends, a warm safe home, a sense of humour, hobbies and interests, no money worries, not being envious of others or making detrimental comparisons, being optimistic, having a positive attitude, helping the less fortunate, finding joy in small things…all help.

I think knowing yourself and what is good for you (ie what you need vs think you want)

Knowing what it is to be content.

Don't get involved in other people's drama.

Don't stress about the things you have no control over, the things you can't change but do make changes to the things you can.

Acknowledge the small changes because they add up to a much bigger change.

Take in the details, don't let life happen without you noticing.

Being content with what I have.
Being realistic with my expectations.
Being very clear on what is most important to me.

For me it's changing things that aren't making you happy - taking the leap to change jobs, move house -pursue your dreams not settling or resenting things.

It made me happy I could take two years off with my babies but now they're older beginning to make changes to my job that are about my wishes and not just the practicalities or fitting around childcare.

Being around positive people, people who make you feel good who encourage you.

@SprayedWithDettol

No life is totally happy. It begins with liking yourself though. It makes dealing with life’s crap a bit easier.

I think this is very true.

This is such a hard but interesting question!

I think it changes too depending on what life stage your at.

For me it's

Don't sweat the small stuff
Have as many experiences as you can
Get lots of sleep
Don't compare to others
Connection with others
Happy kids
Work out what's important to you
Good work/life balance
Enough money
Be grateful
Help others
Like yourself
Don't strive for perfection

Happiness is desiring what you already have (to paraphrase an ancient philosopher)
Works for me.

Most of the above.

@Mantlemoose

Don't sweat the small stuff.

I think this attitude helps.

DP and I are really laid back so I think that helps.

Yes I'd like more money/have savings/be thinner but ultimately we are content even though we aren't high earners/huge house blah blah.

DP was seriously ill a few years ago,it puts things in perspective. Ultimately I think a lot of contentment is down to personality type and past experiences.

Being content with what you have.

"If your needs are met, your wants are unimportant."

A Buddhist monk said that to me in a temple in Scotland.
He was explaining that humans need food, water, shelter, light and heat. If you have those that little else really matters.
You might want a shiny car, but do you want to swap your life time to pay for it?
You might want an expensive holiday, but if someone said it'll cost you 3 years of the 70 years you've been allotted, would you still pull out the credit card?
(I'm not really doing what he said justice, but that's kind of what he was saying.)

Una hora en la ducha*

*literally (not the gross ad) but it’s the ads fault the phrase is always in Spanish in my head