Do you allow mixed gender sleepovers?

[habibibibi]

My 14 yo dd wants a mixed sleepover. I'm on the fence. She assures me that there is nothing romantic between the boys and girls in the group, they are just friends.

I'm really undecided here. On the one hand, my parents allowed it back in the day. We would sleep in the living room and there really was no hanky panky going on. I like that DD has platonic friendships with boys, she enjoys their friendship a lot (less drama, more just being silly). On the other hand, am I inviting trouble by allowing this?

Kind of leaning to yes but that they don't all sleep in the same room (boys in living room, or our office/spare room and girls in bedroom) and that I check with the boys' parents first. Just wondering what others would do or think?

No. No mixed sex sleepovers. My role is to protect. Being together during the day is one thing, but girls in particular are vulnerable when they are sleeping.

@Littleants

Not on your nelly. If brothers and sisters have to be separated for sleeping at ten, no way am I going to allow friends (potentially with relationships) to sleep together. I know they can have sex any time. That does not mean I have to facilitate it.

This. Its a no from me. It ok to say no to your kids sometimes.

I know some one that was sexually assaulted whilst someone was fast asleep at the side of her. I wouldn't ever allow this possible situation to happen at my house.

@MrsRobinsonsHandprints

myheart but equally why is no one concerned with same sex sex?

Because same-sex sex doesn’t get people pregnant? Having said which, if my dc turn out to be gay /lesbian, the same-sex ban will be gently extended to no-sleepovers-with-people-with-whom-you’re-in-relationship ban (may have to work on a snappier title) in order to mitigate unwanted pressure from partners.

@Littleants

Not on your nelly. If brothers and sisters have to be separated for sleeping at ten, no way am I going to allow friends (potentially with relationships) to sleep together. I know they can have sex any time. That does not mean I have to facilitate it.

What? Missed this but as pp says there is no 'rule' if you own your own home they can share till they leave home.

And again, why is it only male and female sex anyone is worried about?

Male/female sex is the kind that results in pregnancy, MrsRobinsons. Might that be a reason?

Nope, no chance.

@MrsRobinsonsHandprints because whatever new emojis would have us believe, only sex between a male and a female results in pregnancy.

Oh god my first instinct was to think what's the problem with a mixed sleepover. And now of course after RTFT I'm very much in the no way camp.

[quote DemBonesDemBones]@MrsRobinsonsHandprints because whatever new emojis would have us believe, only sex between a male and a female results in pregnancy.[/quote]
Oh so pregnancy is the only worry, not STIs, or rape-news flash you don't have to be a girl to be raped, or pressured sex, or non consenting. But no mixed SEX sleepovers the only risk is pregnancy. I despai.

Definitely a NO from me.

@MrsRobinsonsHandprints if you are genuinely concerned your child's friends are going to rape your child at a sleepover...I don't really know what to say?!

[quote DemBonesDemBones]@MrsRobinsonsHandprints if you are genuinely concerned your child's friends are going to rape your child at a sleepover...I don't really know what to say?! [/quote]
If you look at Evesgarden they have sadly written that it has happened, Frenchfancy says that 'girls are vulnerable when they are sleeping* so others are concerned.

I just fail to see how the only horror from a teenage sleepover is pregnancy.

@MrsRobinsonsHandprints well I didn't say that-you just said that.