What's the worst meal you've been served at a wedding?

[Higgeldypiggeldy35]

I'm veggie so unfortunately have had my fair share of shitty wedding meals as the vegetarians often seem to get shafted but this one takes the biscuit. Fancy wedding, very expensive and exclusive venue, meat eaters had a feast and it looked amazing, I was served......a grilled mushroom, and it was cold. This place is probably £100 per head at the very least and the best they could rustle up for a vegetarian was a mushroom. So, make me feel better, what's the worst meal you've been served?
This is meant to be light hearted 🐱

Hog roasts are dodgy. We went to a party with one and the sight of it put me off, as I don’t really like pork. I had the veggie alternative, which was stuffing (tasted like Paxo) and applesauce in a roll. My DH had the pork which was mostly fat. He was ill the next day. I’m glad the trend for them seems to be dying off.

I went to an afternoon tea wedding which was pretty crap in terms of catering. Two sandwich triangles, a dry scone and some mini cakes which tasted like those little frozen ones you get around Christmas. The bride is a bit of a competitive undereater (must be an MNetter) and still brings up the fabulous catering and her wedding and how she ‘pigged out’. Also, piss weak tea and you had to go to the bar and pay if you wanted wine.

Last week I was at a service station late at night and spotted a couple in Burger King dressed in wedding guest gear. I was tempted to ask if they’d been to a shit wedding.

I’ve been to loads of weddings (all either in Ireland or in the UK with either the bride or groom being Irish) and have never had food as described on this thread. Some might not be memorable but it’s all been fine, it not excellent.

kwiksavenofrills you should have, you probably missed out on a really good story!

Vegan.

Not a wedding but a relatives 80th in his golf club.

“Chef will do something for you”. He did. Identical starter and desert. A few pieces of fruit in syrup.

The main was unmemorable but basic. We eat better at home.

Best ones….. daughter’s wedding. Vegan Thai food. Didn’t bill it as vegan it just was therefore no complaints about no meat etc etc.

MIL’s wake. Hired room in vegetarian/vegan restaurant. No set meals people free to order from the menu. As it was some miles away from the crem not everybody arrived at once. She’d have loved it.

At weddings you either do better than everyone else or worse. No half measures. Been home from at least one do via the chippy.

Not me but my husband, (Veggie) we went to one of my friends wedding and the food for us meat eaters were absolutely beautiful, local meat, my husband was served some shitty veggie sausages that was it

You all need to go to Indian weddings or use indian wedding caterers. It's the most incredible bountiful feast you have ever seen.

@Maassi

You all need to go to Indian weddings or use indian wedding caterers. It's the most incredible bountiful feast you have ever seen.

Read my post! I also thought that...hence why I assume a massive fuck up by the caterers

I went to a wedding with around 150 guests and they served asparagus as a starter. All well and good as it tasted delicious but the toilets STANK afterwards! You could smell the asparagus wee all the way back in the function suite!

I'm coeliac. Thus, if I actually get something to eat I'm pretty happy and we always turn up to weddings with a cool box in the boot of the car with food and non alcoholic drinks (I object to paying £3 for a warm diet coke when I don't even like it, or no non alcoholic option during the meal at all) as even if I get a main course there will be no canapes or evening food I can have. Star meals have included melon slices for starter, melon slices for pudding and a totally dry chicken breast in between. But I have been to things where my gluten free meal wasn't and I've had to push it round the plate to avoid questions

At one wedding at a top hotel the mains came out with the silver domes over.

As the covers were lifted off the food for the meat eaters looked great. I looked down on mine which was a ham salad which didn’t look great. Really limp lettuce with a slice of ham on top.

Complained I was not only vegetarian but absolutely would never eat pork.

Ended up in the kitchens arguing with the chef of this 5 star hotel who was insisted that a vegetarian would eat ham, chicken and fish and ham wasn’t pork otherwise I would have described it as pork and not ham.
Pointed out that vegetarianism was about not eating any meat or fish. But would eat dairy/cheese.
I was told that was veganism
Tried to explain veganism and was told that was just being picky and those people had an eating disorder.
I was then served a small dome of white rice with a black olive on top.

Over the years I have had to return to this hotel and had the same issues with every chef time.

Last time, before we moved I managed to persuade that a function was at another venue.

My wedding. The food was so basic and not wedding worthy. Sadly, the wedding organisation was done by my inlaws so l had no say and l hadn't eaten since 5.30 in the morning . All l ate was 2 spoonfuls of rice.

It makes me angry 😠 as l would have done things differently but its the grooms side that arrange everything.

At least l got to choose my wedding dress colour.

@JudgeRindersMinder

The worst wedding meal I had was nothing! Years and years ago I was invited to a wedding with my then boyfriend. It was his friend’s cousin getting married, and the whole crowd of friends was invited. Beautiful day, big house in the country with marquee in the garden…you get the picture.

What none of the friendship group knew was that they’d been specifically invited to do jobs…
One was a keen photographer so he was doing the photos,
My boyfriend was to act as MC
Another friend was on “car park” duty
Various other jobs were distributed

These guys were all kilted up, the girlfriends all in wedding finery, we’d all had “proper” invitations (Scotland so if you’re a day guest you’re there from early afternoon till the wee hours)

The first sign of there being anything amiss was when none of our names appeared in the seating plan, and no it wasn’t an error!

The guys very awkwardly spoke to the friend whose family were hosting and he very awkwardly said that his family saw them as “working” at the wedding and not guests! Why the hell had they been sent invitations I’ll never know

Everyone had drunk a couple of glasses of wine by this point so no one could even drive to a chippy….worst wedding I’ve ever been to…I don’t know if the friendship ever recovered with the mate!

I hope they all left.

At one wedding the starter was melon, but it came on a plate sat in the middle of a pool of REALLY bright green, really thick, rubbery jelly. No one knew what it was or if we were meant to eat it. It didn't taste of anything at all but looked really weird, like some kind of comedy alien food.

I also went to one where the waiters brought out endless courses of a bit of salad but no actual main course or substantial food ever arrived, or pudding either. We gave up and just hit the dancefloor - it was a fab wedding so no one really minded.

@JudgeRindersMinder, you win the thread! What awful people! Thing is, those youngemdtrrs probs ky would have been happy to do those jobs for a sausage roll and a bags of crips if they’d been asked!

Ah yes, being vegan I have had my share of cold, hard, meagre portions of a single vegetable, followed by a tinned fruit salad. Also know that sinking feeling you get when it's a buffet - either the vegan and vegetarian options get hoovered up by meat-eaters (not that I blame them - they're not to know there's a hungry vegan 2 tables back), or the caterers have no idea about catering to different dietary needs. Went to one where there was a bbq, and I looked at it and realised that the only thing I could eat was lettuce and ketchup. Even the buns were those horrible brioche things (who wants a sweet burger??).

Best veeg food was at a wedding anniversary. Oh my god. I still get a shiver of pleasure remembering the sticky toffee pudding

@foodtoorder

I often think my wedding was shit food. It was meant to be a vintage village hall wedding but I don't feel it was executed well enough. Basically buffet style but all on individual tables which was already laid on arrival. The saving grace was the tonne of cupcakes, scones, cream and jam as well as the pimms and ridiculous amount of wine and champagne per table. It makes me cringe and I wonder if others thought the same on the day. I would do it differently now.

This sounds lovely.

Heavily pregnant at a wedding where we didn’t get fed until nearly 9pm, wedding in church 1pm, it was a served meal but had to wait until our table was called up to the serving hatch, one potato, a bit of chicken, a bit of salad, a single bread roll, awful, too many people in the venue, sudden rain pour and a lot of people ran into the room, I was a bit unsteady due to massive bump and nearly got pushed over.

I went to a wedding a few years ago where the veggie option was a vegan one (fair enough), it was apparently a 'roasted cauliflower steak'. What turned up at the table was a quarter of a cauliflower that had been boiled and then briefly introduced to an oven, on a 'bed' of pureed cauliflower. That was it, no cheese, no pepper, no side veg, no nothing - I was ravenous!

The nicest veggie one I've has was probably at a stately home type place in NI. It was a Thai curry with chickpeas and it was damned delicious.

I think you may have been at my wedding. Or at least another one done by my excellent caterers. Cheers, either way

I've blocked out any truly bad experiences. The best food I've had, apart from my own wedding, was definitely an Indian wedding where a wide range of amazing curries were served.

I like to think no one went hungry at mine - 2pm ceremony, afternoon tea served on arrival at venue, wedding breakfast 5pm, and we most certainly did serve the wedding cake along with a range of other food at 10:30pm.

@foodtoorder, if you got married on Bakewell Show Day* about 18 years ago, your afternoon tea in the village hall was wonderful.

*you’ll get the reference if it was you, it never rains on the Bakewell Show….

I'm veggie, went to the evening bit only and there was no food for me at all. The bacon rolls were already made up so couldn't even just have a roll. Free alcohol but no bar food. I'll always have an emergency cereal bar in my bag now!

Hi folks, Id be careful on this thread. Depending what you describe here, could perhaps identify someone's wedding and it may be hurtful for that person. Also we have had some of these threads ending up in the media. Just saying.

Mexican themed wedding. Starter was tortilla and sweetcorn soup which turned out to be watery broth with some soggy doritos floating in it. Main course was a sharing platter of fajitas with a small dish of greasy pulled chicken to be passed around 8 of us - I made nicer ones when I was a broke student! Think pudding was OK, can't even remember what it was.

The only free drinks throughout were shots of tequila or tap water.

Last table up for a cooked buffet and they ran our of food..everyone else had piles of meat, veg, cauliflower cheese and gravy.

I had a small single slice of pork and two roasties.

Been drinking all day too.

Wedding factory in South Yorkshire served us a miserly small dried out plate of chicken and veggies with 1 glass of awful watery red wine. In the middle of no where so no chance of getting anything in. Also charged us rack rate for the room, which came together with a dreadful smell of something decomposing and the smallest ‘double’ bed I’ve ever seen. We asked to move rooms, but not possible as they were full. We went down to breakfast next morning really early as were very hungry and ate loads and loads, it was a buffet, which ran out well before half the wedding guests had appeared. Was very glad to leave and get back home!