I honestly feel like ending it all and stopping the pain of losing dh.
I think I might have ptsd, I have flashbacks of his death, I feel very anxious. I cant visit places where he was or died without horrible feelings.
I'm not sleeping, the 9nly thing that works is a sleeping tablets which has given me, the nurse practitioner refuses to give them. But it's either i drink myself to death or I kill myself.
I've had promethazine prescribed. Its useless. Mirtazapine turned me into a raving monster.
I'm pissed off, my life is meaningless the only thing that gets me up is the kids. Yes I've been out, gone for walks, gone for lunch etc
But the dh shaped hole is there all the time.
My life is shit. Always has been. I had 3 beautiful blissful years with him 8 days married then fucking bastard cancer took him.i feel so low
Nobody has to reply..but I just need to vent