Fucking hand dryers.

[SwanShaped]

My kid won’t go in any toilet with one in it. Which is almost all of them! Argh!!!!!!

@TWBAEM

Our DC managed to get over this through a game they weirdly invented (not saying this is going to work for anyone else btw it was just a strange thing they both did). We had an enormous cardboard box and I thought it would be nice to turn it into a petrol pump as one of the DC had been given a ride on car for their birthday. However I am not very crafty and DC started pretending it was a loo they found this hilarious, especially when I tried to insist it was a petrol pump. So I said if it was a loo then it would have to have a hand dryer and made one out of a shoebox and a kitchen roll. The children and I would take turns on the loo (it is embarrassing just relaying this, but it was just one of those "keep the DC amused by any means possible on a wet Saturday" things) but when it was my 'turn' I would insist that no one use the 'hand dryer' and if they did then I would roll on the floor pretending to scream. Of course DC pressed it a lot. DH actually made me stop the game as he thought it was reinforcing their fear and at the time I thought he was right and stopped. But the next time we were out and went to the public loo one of the DC pressed the button on the hand dryer as we went into the loos and of course I then pretended to be scared. So they pretty much cured themselves by enjoying watching me make a prat of myself. There followed the saga of stopping them pressing the button everytime we went into the loos (why is everything such a battle???) but the fear of the dryer had ended.

Like I said this won't work for anyone else, my DC are just weird!

I absolutely love this!!

In a badly layout toilet once a lady set a hand dryer off just above my DD's head while she was on the baby change table, she was about 18months old and it terrified her, took me ages to calm her down.

Public toilets seem to rarely consider younger children. Cubicles too small for two, toilets, flushes and sinks too high and hand dryers too loud. Seems a bit unfair to me.

My 8yr old is the same. She has very sensitive hearing after having glue ear for years so any loud noises freak her out. She will use them but I have to cover her ears at the same time.

My children hated them too, especially the youngest who would accidentally set them off if I didn't catch him before he walked underneath them. I don't use them if there are small children there.

Yeah I’ve had that too where my kid is screaming and frightened. And then someone else will put it on and say ‘it’s a bit loud isn’t it?’ Or something similar. I always thought it was through being thoughtless. But maybe actually some women do it deliberately. Also, HAND DRYERS ARE SO SHIT AT DRYING HANDS!!! I wouldn’t mind all of this so much if hand dryers were any good.

TWBAEM maybe I need to get in on the hand dryer role play therapy.

How old is DC. My charge is 3.5 and just for the last 6 months has fully embraced hand dryers. Went from hysterics to full on looking forward to drying his hands 🙈🙈 kids!
So what I’m saying is, thats shit OP but with any luck there’s light at the end of the tunnel!

She’s 3 and a half. It’s been slowly getting worse and worse from nerves to full on screaming and kicking to not go in the toilet.

But you’re right, they do just change sometimes suddenly.

@SwanShaped

She’s 3 and a half. It’s been slowly getting worse and worse from nerves to full on screaming and kicking to not go in the toilet.

Oh bless her that must be really hard work for both of you.

@SwanShaped I can confirm it works particularly well if you and your children are out with your stylish, child-free friends (the sort that have designer handbags rather than a backpack full of crumbs and old lolly sticks). For some reason this seems to amplify the fear cancelling effect .

Haha TW that sounds ace. Did anyone film it?

Thanks socially. It’s been a tricky day with her emotions and I posted when I was feeling so so so fed up. She been next level today.

I sincerely hope not! It hasn't gone viral yet though, and it was a couple of years ago so hopefully I'm safe!

Sorry to hear you have had a tricky day, hoping tomorrow is better for you.

Thanks. I’m sure tomorrow will be an easier day. No hand dryers for starters.

@SwanShaped

Some understanding posters, as ever, thank you. And some who think I’ve clearly not tried hard enough in and that telling her to get over it would work. Day trip all today and I tried to get her to go in about 4 times. She was screaming and hitting and trying anything she could to get out of my arms. Not being naughty, just petrified. I don’t tell her off for being frightened. The toilet we went in, I even showed her that it wasn’t working. She still wouldn’t go in the room. Single toilet so no one else in it.

Also, fucking hand dryers is a thing isn’t it? Don’t some men stick their dicks in the dyson ones that you dangle your hands into? Or is that an urban myth?

Hand dryers are gross anyway. Just germs flying about everywhere.

I still stand by they need to get over it and no one at all has said to tell her off. She's 3.5 so probably has only been using toilets for a year and due to lock down may have limited experience so of course she's scared, nearly every kid is. You just keep exposing them, reassuring them and not avoiding the issue. It's not going to happen overnight but you keep exposing them to dryers. It's much easier to deal with a screaming toddler than a older child behaving like that so now is the time.

No adults scream and roll on the floor when a hand dryer starts so it's obviously something they do get through. As I said mine also had huge issues but I wouldn't avoid a toilet as they don't like the noise. They have to do things they don't like or make them scared. I'm particularly thinking of one of mine who has spectrum markers but still has learned to understand certain things are non negotiable like being in their car seat when they were younger, wearing a airline seat belt, following the rules at airport security etc. I don't agree with avoiding toilets or switching dryers off but you aren't doing that anyway and I'm not accusing you of bad parenting. I do think you have some issues with dryers yourself if you think they are dirty and men "fuck them". Surely that wouldn't be happening in the ladies anyway!

Haha, at me having issues with hand dryers! They are gross. Have a read of this. www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-bacterial-horror-of-the-hot-air-hand-dryer-2018051113823

Or this. www.leeds.ac.uk/news-health/news/article/3629/hand-dryers-can-spread-bacteria-in-public-toilets-research-finds

And surely someone else has heard what some men do to Dyson Airblades?

The Airflow or Dyson are the worst. Like jet engines, even to an adult. They’re too powerful now, literally spraying germs everywhere 😷

@SwanShaped

And surely someone else has heard what some men do to Dyson Airblades?

Can honestly say that a) I've never come across this idea and b) it's an absolutely horrifying thought.

I am aware of the issues with them spreading bacteria and would choose a paper towel over a dryer if there was the option. I have skin issues so I need to dry my hands otherwise my skin splits so a dryer is better than nothing. I have never read nor wish to read about shagging dryers .

What I meant is you are speaking about them very negatively here so perhaps your child is subconsciously picking up on your concerns. Whether you like them or not they are a feature in many public toilets so learning to live with them will be necessary even if you don't personally use them.

@Phalarope

Was once approached in an M&S loo by a small child, maybe 4ish, who very nicely asked if I would mind not using the hand dryers while he was in there. It was immensely sweet, and who’s going to say no to a very serious tiny polite person.

Quite a few have said no to DS when he's asked sweetly and explained that they're scary. He's always been politely confident about saying what's on his mind! He still struggled at 6. I only managed to get him to dry his own hands by clapping my hands firmly over his ears.

After a year off at 7 through much of the past year, he finally seems to be coping better at 8. He has grown a lot taller in the past 18m.

Progress on calmly talking through the fear of dogs is still pretty limited, for both him and my auristic, sensory 10yo. Funnily he's less bothered by dryers, but quite likes strange noises like speaker crackle/ fuzz.

@SnarkyBag

It’s quite a common fear. I think the problem is the room goes from silent to mega noisy in a split second so it gives them a fright too. Ear defenders are a good idea though

Also they are a lot closer to child height My kids called them "the noisy" All grown out of it now, thank God

The noisy! Yes! We also had an issue with motorbikes for a long time. It got worse and worse to the point of her trying to refuse to come on the school run in case there was a motorbike. She’d be crying and trying to undress herself so she didn’t have to come. It was a bloody nightmare. And 6 months of crying for hours before nursery because it was too noisy there. She really really really hates noise.

That’s a bit harsh of the other people bogroll