A levels or BTEC if lazy but bright?

[teensteens]

DS had planned to take A levels at 6th form college in September but had a place to do a BTEC as back up. He did no work for GCSEs so was unsure if he would get the grade 7s required for maths, physics, computing A levels. He exceeded the grades but is now unsure if he wants to do the work required for A levels.

Am trying to get him to consider the pros and cons. Personally I dont think he has the work ethic for A levels as he has never done homework or revision (he has SEN and struggles with the concept of either) however he loves physics and has found it incredibly easy whereas there is no BTEC he is that interested in.

He had applied to do computing BTEC but many of the modules are not of that much interest to him and it appears to involve more writing than the A levels and very little programming.

Any thoughts welcome. Thanks

This was my son 2 years ago. Scraped his GCSEs with 5s and didn't get into sixth form. He was gutted but couldn't deny he hadn't put the work in.

He started an engineering btec and while he was frustrated at the slowness at times he enjoyed it overall and came out with the highest mark (DDD). I was stunned, tbh as he didn't put the work in here either. I think they are either academic or they aren't, much to my frustration!

Anyway he's started an engineering apprenticeship now, so definitely have a look at engineering - we tried to stay as generic as possible to give him more options for uni/apprenticeship

www.adhdawarenessmonth.org/adhd-excuse-for-laziness/

Without support, acknowledgement and accommodations for ADHD (and possibly ASD, is there any plan for a diagnosis there?) it seems unlikely that your DS will cope with either BTEC or A-levels, and the same disruptive behaviours he had a school will probably rear up as he struggles to cope in the classroom.

You need to be putting a bit of a fight up for him here. What does he need? Does he need permission to leave the classroom and go for a little wander when he needs a movement break? Will there be access to a dedicated ‘quiet room’ that he can access when he needs to self regulate? Does your son recognise the signs that he is becoming overloaded, and is he is able to communicate this?

Does he have triggers such as overhead lights ? (They are often on unnecessarily in classrooms and could be turned off or down if there is enough natural light)

Does the teacher understand that he might doodle or fidget while she/he is talking, but that it doesn’t mean he is not concentrating. Are they mindful of the fact that he might miss a whole chunk of information or instruction and that if he asks for it, a “you should have listened the first time” response is NOT appropriate?

Educate yourself, and your DS and then if the college fail to adapt and support, you’ll need to educate them too.

Have you got time to sit down with your DS at the end of the day and help him file and organise his notes from the day?

Does he have medication, if not, is that an option for him?

Another one with a 'bright but lazy'
DC. Started A levels but left due to not making mid year grades and poor attendance . Started apprenticeship age 17 and he is still there as full time employee .

The thing with the lazy, and I don't know if this is your DS too but mine was lazy at things he wasn't particularly interested in. Never lazy at hobbies or sports . And being in work has been brilliant for him, he is hard working , responsible and loved the adult company, I think making him grow up too compared to 6th form / uni surrounded by own age group .

Shiny - I agree if he finds something he is interested in he wont be lazy however so far that has only been a few obsessions and nothing connected to work or school but it could potentially happen. I cant imagine adult company or apprenticeship working yet as so reluctant to do full time hours and not really relating to adults yet.

Frazzle - My OP presumably didnt clarify but suffice to say the majority of the last 16 years has been spent doing everything you mention and far far more such that I cant work and his 3 siblings have been almost self sufficient from a very young age. Focus has been on trying to keep him in school until GCSEs. I never believed it would happen and know it wouldnt have without my full time support. Home schooling in lockdown required 1 to 1 full time. I spoke/met his head teacher and senior staff more over the last 11 years than most of my friends and fought for so many adjustments to timetable, subjects, choice of schools and teachers, scribe for exams etc to try to keep him in a school. He never took notes in lessons but I have always filed all handouts etc. He has never looked back at a book so it is not a worthwhile task. He cant be medicated due to other medication that conflicts but has received lots of other NHS support. I provide colour coded timetables and books etc, and spend much of my life solving one crisis after another and getting professional support. The lost property offices for trains and buses know me well!

Sounds like you're an incredible support to your DS. I have a feeling I'll be doing the same for my son as he progresses through the school system (he has ASD and ADHD) - which will be interesting as I'm chronically disorganised myself!

If your DS is ok with the commute then I would ask definitely go for A levels. As long as the college understand him and how to engage him, it sounds as if the raw ability is certainly there.

My DS did a BTEC in applied science followed by a foundation degree in civil engineering and it was a lot of work , but the different practical elements actually allowed him to find what he wants to do for work (Quantity surveying with accounting/ option 2 was research because he enjoyed watching concrete dry 🤔) It's taken him a while but he's worked part-time throughout and is heading straight into 2nd year for Uni after taking a couple of years out. It was frustrating to watch but he's a lot more motivated because he now has a clear goal. He's dyspraxic and very intelligent, but he needed the time for his confidence to catch up with intellect.

@Aspiringmatriarch

Sounds like you're an incredible support to your DS. I have a feeling I'll be doing the same for my son as he progresses through the school system (he has ASD and ADHD) - which will be interesting as I'm chronically disorganised myself!

If your DS is ok with the commute then I would ask definitely go for A levels. As long as the college understand him and how to engage him, it sounds as if the raw ability is certainly there.

As a mum with a late diagnosed Dyspraxic and co-morbid ADHD son who's also disorganised.... my DH and neurotypical son both think that I have the same so I went to ask for assesment and passed/failed screening tests (depends on how you look at that) and am on a waiting list for an ADHD assesment.

Anyway - in the meantime I've implimented/stolen quite a few of DS2's copeing strategies which are really helping me keep on top of stuff

(I'm diagnosed dyslexic, at aged 30, in addition)

In reply to the OP

My ADHD/Dyspraxic son failed the GCSE's to get into A-Level college so we instigated plan B where he went to an engeneering college affiliated with a local university. He was lazy again, and the college didn't plan/manage his SEN well. This clusterfuck of incompetance and lazyness led to a year 12 faliure.

Thankfully, students get an extra year's paid education so that they can re-sit/re-start their Further Education at year 12 or 13

There was some element of me stepping back in order for him to feel the consiquences of his behaviour and actions. It wasn't a pretty year by anyone's standards. Letting one's child fail is never easy.

It was not a faliure, though because there were some really important life lessons learnt.

He researched and applied for his dream course and completed it this spring with a merit grade. (It was a BTEC Extended equivelant) and he's off to Manchester to university to study sound engimeering and music production. I'm happy that it's ended like this but there were moments where it was looking decidedly iffy, especially with zoom being a really difficut learning environment to access for him.

I write about our experience without offering advice because only you know what will / may work for your son.

Key learnings for us/him were

a) Full disclosure of work difficulties/ deadline issues really helps (No shit sherlock)
b) Befreinding or treating your mentor like a human being trying to help is a great stratergy
c)Making mistakes is fine - learning from them is crucial, finding what works for you is key.