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Just going in a church anytime you need

29 replies

NinaGonk · 19/08/2021 21:58

I've never been religious but am having a very difficult and sad time. I've thought it might be helpful to go and sit in a church and take a moment to pause and think and maybe feel hope.

Can I just walk into a church and sit? Are they open all the time?

Apologies if this is ridiculous, I've only ever been on a sunday as a child.

OP posts:
54321nought · 19/08/2021 21:59

if the door is unlocked, you can walk in, they are public buildings

Obviously if there is some sort of event inside, you may have to ask if its ok just to sit in the back for a bit

Echobelly · 19/08/2021 22:00

Churches will all be different but yes, if it's open I'm sure you are welcome. I hope it helps. Flowers

LittlePearl · 19/08/2021 22:01

Many are OP, and yes you can go and sit in them any time.

A friend of mine regularly did this. Not a church goer as such, but liked to sit quietly and enjoy the peace. She found it very helpful.

Sorry to hear you're having a difficult time. I hope you find your way through it.

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ajandjjmum · 19/08/2021 22:01

Yes - depending on the Church being open. I am not a regular church goer, but sometimes wander in to sit quietly - I find it very peaceful.

happytoday73 · 19/08/2021 22:01

Normally yes many are open quite a lot...can just go in and sit... Enjoy the quiet. You will probably be asked if you are OK..

Not sure how this works under current covid restrictions

Lansonmaid · 19/08/2021 22:02

Most churches should be open now. Our local church is open from about 9-4 for visits and private prayer or just to just sit and enjoy a bit of peace and quiet away from the noise and bustle outside. I hope and pray that you find the calm you are looking for Thanks

mynameisnotmichaelcaine · 19/08/2021 22:04

If it's open, yes. Years ago, when I was pregnant with my first and my mum was dying, I found out I wasn't going to be entitled to any maternity pay from the job that I had (I was a newly qualified teacher). I went and sat in our local church (a big one as we lived in a city centre at the time) and I just cried and cried. The vicar heard me and just sat with me. When I had stopped crying he arranged an appointment with the Citizens Advice Bureau and they worked out a way for me to get some maternity pay. I will never forget the kindness of that vicar, although I long ago lost my faith.

CornishTiger · 19/08/2021 22:04

Yes normally open from just after 9 til late afternoon/6ish.

I’ve done this a bit recently. I’m not religious. I’ve found more peace personally in the grounds. I have also spoken to the Reverend a couple of times. The first time I was in deep distress and she really helped me even though im not particularly religious. She helped me gone to terms with some news and deal with the eventual aftermath.

Ieatmarmite · 19/08/2021 22:05

Hi, I wouldn't describe myself as a Christian but I find the peace & quiet of a church very soothing when I'm "not in a good place". Many smaller churches are often locked up but usually churches in town centres are open during the day.

CornishTiger · 19/08/2021 22:07

In fact when I think of times of crisis I have found the greatest kindness has been shown by those of faith and they have never pushed their beliefs on me.

pastabest · 19/08/2021 22:07

I often feel like this and despite being not religious often think about doing the same thing.

However, more recently I've started doing a very gentle form of yoga, in a church hall, which involves a lot of lying/sitting peacefully with your own thoughts. It seems to be hitting the spot for me

Prior to that I often drove somewhere with a view and just sat in the car

NinaGonk · 19/08/2021 22:08

That's lovely @mynameisnotmichaelcaine x

My second option would be to go and sit quietly in a forest but I think if I end up crying my eyes out it might alarm passers by. I imagine churches see a fair bit of that.

OP posts:
Darkchocolateandcoffee · 19/08/2021 22:09

Yes you can. I do this sometimes.

Blueeyedgirl21 · 19/08/2021 22:10

You can normally walk in, I’ve never done it in a random ‘suburban’ or village church unless it’s like a tourist attraction in a touristy village- I find town center cathedrals and churches lovely and welcoming. I am not religious and not a believer but I spend an hour inside the Manchester cathedral after the bombing there, signed the book of condolence and had a cry and got into a lovely conversation with a lady who was volunteering there. It was so peaceful.

mynameisnotmichaelcaine · 19/08/2021 22:13

@NinaGonk It was lovely. My faith in God might have all but disappeared but it certainly helped restore my faith in the kindness of humans. I hope you are ok, and that your difficult time passes.

DaisyWaldron · 19/08/2021 22:16

Some cathedrals charge for entry, but that's generally for tourism, and they will let you in for private prayer if you let them know that's why you are there. My local cathedral has a little chapel for private prayer that is hidden away from the tourists, so even on a busy day you can find somewhere peaceful.

memberofthewedding · 19/08/2021 22:17

I am not religious but have done this abroad, even in Catholic countries. Somewhere to sit down that is quiet, cool and peaceful.

BathTangle · 19/08/2021 22:18

OP we have this welcome sign in our church (which is open all the time) - sums up how we feel about it:

We offer a special welcome to those who are single, divorced, widowed, gay, confused, filthy rich or dirt poor. We extend a special welcome to wailing babies and excited toddlers.

We welcome you whether you can sing like Pavarotti or just growl quietly to yourself. You’re welcome here is you’re just browsing, just woken up, or just got out of prison.

We don’t care if you’re more Christian than the Archbishop of Canterbury, or haven’t been to church since Christmas ten years ago.

We extend a special welcome to those who are over 60 but not grown up yet, and to teenagers who are growing up too fast.

We welcome keep-fit Mums, football Dads, starving artists, tree huggers, latte-sippers, vegetarians, junk food eaters. We welcome those in recovery or still addicted.

We welcome you if you are having problems, or down in the dumps, or don’t like organised religion – we’re not too keen on it either!

We offer a welcome to those who think that the earth is flat, who work too hard, don’t work, can’t spell, or are here because Granny is visiting and wanted to come to church.

We offer a welcome to those who are inked, pierced, both or neither.

We offer a special welcome to those who could use a prayer right now, had religion shoved down their throats as kids, or got lost in Oxford and wound up here by mistake.

We welcome pilgrims, tourists, seekers, doubters – and you.

Peace be with you today.

Twatterati · 19/08/2021 22:22

Most should be open now - as PP have said, they're public places and anyone can wander in whenever they're open. Even if there is a wedding going on, no one can prevent you wandering in (just as all church weddings are actually 'public').

I hope and pray that you find comfort in doing this. I do have a faith (Christian) but even before finding my faith I used to visit churches to just sit and enjoy the peace and tranquility. They're one of the only public spaces where it's not too noisy, and the architecture is usually beautiful, stained glass windows. It's a good place to just sit and be still.

If there are people there, like the vicar/pastor then they will be very welcoming and just leave you be unless you want to chat. They also won't force their faith on to you. However, if you are curious they will happily answer any questions you have. Some larger cathedrals sometimes have a donations box, but there is absolutely no obligation to put anything in, it's ok to just go in, look round and have a sit down.

I'm very sorry that you are having a difficult time. Life can be so hard sometimes and we often get thrown horrendous curve balls that just knock the stuffing out of us and seem totally overwhelming. Just know that there are people who know and love you, there are us here that will listen and help, and this time will pass. One day all of this will be a distant memory.
I don't mean to make light of your suffering at all, quite the opposite, I just want to encourage you and reassure you that this will pass. We get through things, we cope, we move forward. Circumstances and the difficult times certainly change us, and can change our life, but we do move forwards and it does get easier. ThanksThanks

LoveFall · 19/08/2021 22:28

DH have traveled quite a bit in the past decade. Almost everywhere we went we found churches open and welcoming. I would often sit quietly for awhile, or make a small donation and light a candle in honour of lost loved ones.

LawnFever · 19/08/2021 22:29

@BathTangle that’s lovely 😊

@NinaGonk I hope you find a quiet place to sit and it brings you some peace, I’m not religious but I’ve sat in an empty quiet church in the past and I’ve felt better from it, sending you some love.

JacquelineCarlyle · 19/08/2021 22:29

You'd be very welcome to go in and sit at any CoE church Op and I believe that all churches would make you welcome. Hope you find your own peace.

PotteringAlong · 19/08/2021 22:30

You can. I hope you find peace Flowers

Brimorion · 19/08/2021 22:36

Just to say that I go into churches a fair bit — cheerfully atheist, but like the architecture and have a thing for medieval wall paintings — and the only time I ever had anyone approach me in a UK church of any denomination was someone who came dashing in to a small village church because they thought I was a thief! I’d be very surprised to be approached if sitting quietly in a pew.

PeterPomegranate · 19/08/2021 22:44

@Twatterati What a lovely post

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