Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Is Brighton a good place to start again?…

100 replies

Rossetti47 · 18/08/2021 18:30

Hey all, I am desperate for some advice. I am sitting in my half empty house which my ex-partner left today. I am 💔. We had our problems but I never thought we’d split up. My house sale completes next week and then I have no ties to anywhere at all. I have some good friends locally but they’re all married and busy. The area I live in now is a very conservative commuter town with little going on. I am financially secure but I’ll definitely need to score a job whilst I’m training to be a counsellor to cover day to day expenses. Do I have a delusional view of Brighton, thinking that it’d be a great place to meet people and get a job? I think it’d be ace to train there, but I’m in such a start of turmoil I’ve lost my inner guide! Thanks :)

OP posts:
wednesdayweather · 19/08/2021 08:57

On being a counsellor - are you realistic about earnings potential? I had a friend who worked as a counsellor, in an expensive and affluent city. She had a social work background, decades of experience as a counsellor, referrals from agencies and still only made 18k a year by the time she was in her 50s (working full time as a counsellor). As a private practice counsellor she also had to work evenings, which will affect your ability to go out in evenings and make friends in a new place.
You've probably already thought of all this, but just a thought.

Original poster
Rossetti47 · 19/08/2021 09:13

Thanks @wednesdayweather. Confess this is a concern of mine, but I’m just so lost at the moment. I’m only one year into training too. It was all so easy before we split up, counselling was to be my vocation. He’s just taken everything away.

OP posts:
SingingInTheShithouse · 19/08/2021 09:23

Southsea in Portsmouth is often touted as an alternative to Brighton

Really Confused. I have friends there & have visited & stayed over often & it couldn't be more different

icelollycraving · 19/08/2021 09:31

Southsea is very different to Brighton!

pisspants · 19/08/2021 09:32

@SingingInTheShithouse
I have dreams of moving to the coast so quite often read these kind of threads and Southsea does seem to come up a lot! I've heard Portsmouth itself is not that nice but that Southsea is quite vibrant and a bit boho, plus has the beaches? Like I say, I've not been so could all be an exaggeration.

muffindays · 19/08/2021 09:34

personal opinion - Shoreham is depressing, unattractive, dull and nothing like brighton - would avoid!!

SingingInTheShithouse · 19/08/2021 09:54

@pisspants I think it's a nice place, I have 2 old friends living there & another nearby & they all moved from london & love it. Friend swapped his half of inheritance from his dads 2 bed london flat into a 4 bed house with huge garden & money to spare to renovate how he liked. He loves it

Hastings is another place friends have left London for, I used to think the place was a bit of a shit hole, but they all love it & it has a similar, but more low key vibe to Brighton

SingingInTheShithouse · 19/08/2021 09:55

Oops, lost a line... I think it's a nice place, just absolutely nothing like Brighton

icelollycraving · 19/08/2021 10:09

Old town in Hastings is full of DFL. I really like it and wanted to move there when you could get a whacking great house for a song but dh thought it was shitty. I used to go frequently in summer growing up so I have fond memories of it.

Hoolihan · 19/08/2021 10:16

I live in Shoreham and can confirm it is quite dull. I think depressing is going a bit far though 😂

Embracelife · 19/08/2021 10:19

@newnortherner111

Whilst I enjoy visiting Brighton from time to time and have done so all my life (dad came from Lancing), I would never live in any coastal town or city myself. Any touristy place feels dead between Christmas and Easter, I have found.
Visited for dd s uni interviews in winter January. Loved the buzz on sea front People walking running skate boarding etc and clearly its a living city all year Lots going on and not a dead winter beach town at all (very unlike seaside town I grew up in).

600k is good budget for sure will get you more than zone 2 or 3 london

Hoolihan · 19/08/2021 10:20

Brighton is definitely not dead in the winter, it's fun and buzzy all year round with some insanely overcrowded weekends in the summer.

averythinline · 19/08/2021 10:31

I've visited a lot as parents lived there for a while...and friend did film studies always thought it had a bleak unhappy vibe underneath.. it's a bit like Facebook everything on the surface 'cool whacky alternative arty' but within a quite narrow way...and snooty for those not cool, whacky etc.....bit like Glastonbury for some reason ..yes better out of the summer but still.....oddly enough prefer Cambridge for the range/society but nowhere near the sea!
Definitely rent....after a break up whilst grieving not the time to make big decisions....other suggestions folkestone/Swansea....

SirVixofVixHall · 19/08/2021 10:38

A good friend lives in Hastings, she moved there from Whitstable, and loves both places. She is your age and widowed, with adult children who live in London.

BuffaloCauliflower · 19/08/2021 10:42

What about Bristol? Lots going on, all my cool friends in their 30s and 40s seem to be moving there. Near the sea but not in a touristy way.

Embracelife · 19/08/2021 11:52

@BuffaloCauliflower

What about Bristol? Lots going on, all my cool friends in their 30s and 40s seem to be moving there. Near the sea but not in a touristy way.
Bristol is not on the coast like Brighton is.
TheMilkisoff · 01/09/2021 17:39

I started again in Brighton twenty years ago. I have now had a family here. I think it's a great place to meet people because a lot of people are in the same boat. If I was to compare it to places in Surrey or Wales for example, it's much more friendly, open and accepting. I have loads of friends now, all really lovely people.

Don't go where the tourists go and you'll love it. Locals don't go to the middle of the beach, the pier etc.

TheMilkisoff · 01/09/2021 17:43

Oh and there are a lot of counsellors here. Not sure if that makes it difficult to find work.
600k will get you a nice place.

Original poster
Rossetti47 · 01/09/2021 17:54

Hey @TheMilkisoff I have lived in both Surrey and Wales, so this made me smile. I can well believe that there’s a plethora of counsellors there. I’m still unsure about where to go. I suspect that’s because I haven’t accepted the reality of my relationship breakdown. Thanks for your time :)

OP posts:
Cheesewiz · 01/09/2021 17:57

I lived in Central Brighton 10 years ago, in Kemptown. I now live close by, 25 minutes on train to Central Brighton as I have young and I didn't want to bring them up there. If I was childless, then I would move back if I had the chance too! There is poverty and quite a few homeless but I loved it, and I miss it!

Cheesewiz · 01/09/2021 17:57

*Young children

FrownedUpon · 01/09/2021 18:06

I think it’s really overpriced for somewhere quite grubby & overcrowded. Lots of nicer & cheaper places around.

Original poster
Rossetti47 · 01/09/2021 18:14

Thanks guys :) I have to agree about house prices, it’s bloody expensive

OP posts:
Johnbowlby · 01/09/2021 18:23

There are indeed a lot of counsellors in Brighton. Someone upthread said it best - Brighton is grubby. My lungs heave with the air pollution when I step out of the station. It is worse than London in this respect. Ironic that the Greens are in power there

TeeBee · 01/09/2021 18:26

Why don't you spend a few weekends here and get a feel for the place and see if it suits you?