Anyone else hate being back in the office?

[Lizzie523]

Been back 2 weeks full time and I hate it. It is worth saying I've been living alone through the whole pandemic and im a mix of introvert/extrovert. Asked for flexibility and a gradual return, was flat out denied and sent back full time straight away.

I hate:

• constant noise from extroverts in the small office, they never stop talking and I'm much less productive back in already. My job requires focus and I don't get it. Don't like listening to headphones all day as a so called solution.
• I'm really struggling with the constant repetition of small talk. 'what did you do/are you doing at the weekend?' repeated 10 times on a Friday. 'what are you having for lunch' every day, can't tolerate it at all even though it is meant to be a normal social lubricant!
• the commute. Hours there and back every day during peak times is causing my anxiety to sky rocket.

Anyone else really struggling with it?

I think it's likely that you will get used to it. Lots of people struggled when they had to start working from home, the lack of real time interaction with colleagues, the lack of boundaries between home and office life. But they made adjustments and coped, just as you will once you get back into it.

I’ve been in our office throughout, at one point one of less than 5 people with all of the other 80 plus WFH. We’ve moved to a smaller office now, as using a hybrid wfh policy. It’s horrendous. The, albeit small, contact center is in among us and obvs they are on the phone all day - they used to be in a different area along the corridor. It’s constant noise.

@NoEffingWaytoSurvive get a job in an office then. Nobody is stopping you.

Like the OP I was always irritated by colleagues yak yaking around me and the high temperature of the office because others wanted to wander round in t shirts year round, however I didn't think that there was an alternative.

But there was, wfh, and it was wonderful!

Unfortunately my company 'invested' in a new office before Covid struck so we need to be seen to be using it.

We had a trial day at the office last week and it was bloody awful. Really hard to concentrate with everyone talking around me (on calls to customers most of the time to be fair, but still noisy) plus rather than logging on at 8.15 I was getting into my car for a (now) 45 minute commute. Huge waste of time and petrol.

@stitchinguru Yep, got to say I agree.

The point is, why do people have to endure office-based work when wfh is feasible & effective?
noeffingwaytosurvive similarly to the OP I hope you find a work situation that suits you better, perhaps an office-based job.
We don't have to be martyrs to the 9-5 commute if there are other options out there.

I think before the pandemic hit I would have said WFH is great and should be encouraged but I’ve been on the other side of this and I think the problem is that WFH can be beneficial to individuals (though even that not all of the time) but others who share that space may not agree.

I started my maternity leave last November, had ds in December. DP has WFH throughout, and I have found it extremely challenging. If you’ve ever been on a train with someone having a loud phone conversation and think how distracting that is and then imagine having that in your space all day.

I can’t comment on his work as I don’t fully understand it but I doubt that when he was in the office he spent hours messing with his car. Then working until late in the evening leaving me with ds alone because he needs to finish something.

I bought him a Fitbit last year and he doesn’t bother wearing it as most days he doesn’t do even 1000 steps. He’s gained two stone. I don’t mind on an aesthetic level but from a health point of view it’s bad news: he was already a little overweight but his BMI is now nearly 40.

He’s unwell at the moment and I do think it’s under exposure to germs possibly. (Done a covid test and negative.)

We are house hunting just at the moment and I had to have a pretty firm conversation where I told him if wfh worked for him that was great but he needed somewhere separate to the main house, as it isn’t fair on me or ds or any other children we might have to force us to spend our leisure time in his office. I think he was pretty taken aback as I’d not really mentioned it before, but I can honestly say wfh has been awful here and I’ve hated it.

@Ihaventgottimeforthis Companies house, HMRC, and the dvla have been working from home and have been absolutely awful to deal with.

If wfh is so efficient, why am I constantly having to spend ridiculous amounts of time waiting for a response from almost every company I try to contact?
And when I do eventually manage to make contact, I am told how services are disrupted/restricted as a result of the Covid crisis.
My very short lunch ‘hour’ away from the pupils in my classroom bubble has often disappeared as I attempt to get a decent service from those slogging their guts out at home.
Still, mustn’t grumble.

It is interesting how this really is becoming a significant recruitment differentiator between companies. I'm looking for a new role at the mo and so many well regarded employers are making key statements of 'working location independence' first and foremost in their ads. I'm also recruiting for
an entry level position and every single interviewee has mentioned it. In a nutshell, if a company doesn't allow flexibility they will fail to attract decent applicants. It is short sighted and naive to think otherwise.

Back to the OP - I do feel your pain. The horror of an open plan office after essentially having your own office for the last 18 months. On a practical level, you can get very good noise cancelling headphones these days - you don't have to use them to listen to anything, just to cut out other people 🙂

If wfh is so efficient, why am I constantly having to spend ridiculous amounts of time waiting for a response from almost every company I try to contact?

It depends totally on the type of job, and you can’t say wfh isn’t efficient based on your experience of it not being efficient in those circumstances. In my job I only deal with people internally in my company, a significant number of these people would work in a different office (and at times a different country) to me even if we were all back in the office. The other week I had a call with a colleague in the Boston office who was also at home. It made no difference to that call that we were both at home, rather than sitting in our respective offices. It would be ridiculous of me to extrapolate from my experience that wfh is always fine, but it’s equally ridiculous for you to say it isn’t efficient based on your customer service experiences.

@Knittingupastorm
I am fairly confident when I say that I don’t think this is just my experience of customer service in the past 18 months. Another poster has already mentioned the DVLA, HMRC and Companies House…. This are large and pivotal establishment, and if they haven’t ‘got it together’, then I’d say this was pretty typical.

If wfh is so efficient, why am I constantly having to spend ridiculous amounts of time waiting for a response from almost every company I try to contact?

There's loads of reasons, including slot of customer facing companies have exploited the fact that they can claim 'lines are busy due to wfh'. They haven't increased staff to cover sickness. They haven't replaced staff that have left. And it they feel people are less likely to complain if their message is 'the lines are busy because we care about keeping our staff safe' that just admitting it's a business move to save some money.

Or they weren't ready for it tech wise and decided not to spend any money improving it in the last 18 months. Or their managers are woefully, poor at remote people management. Or that those jobs just dont work wfh

But that's not what the op is talking about though. She is talking about how she is feeling.

I think clients, other family members and the employer can have very different views on whether WFH works.

[quote stitchinguru]@Knittingupastorm
I am fairly confident when I say that I don’t think this is just my experience of customer service in the past 18 months. Another poster has already mentioned the DVLA, HMRC and Companies House…. This are large and pivotal establishment, and if they haven’t ‘got it together’, then I’d say this was pretty typical.[/quote]
Right, but I’d still say the main issue is perhaps those in jobs where they have to deal with people externally, particularly in an ad hoc way, such as members of the public calling up. Or perhaps where they haven’t got their IT systems sorted. My job has always involved people working in different offices, some people (not my role) working for varying amounts of time in client offices, and a degree of wfh although this has considerably increased in the last 18 months, and as such the IT has been in place for a while to allow easy access to files, communication between staff in different places etc etc.
My point wasn’t that some places aren’t doing badly, just that it’s not a necessary and inevitable effect of wfh.

People who can't work from home, that come onto these threads to moan at people who can or do wfh, baffle me.

I can't imagine telling teachers, they should suck up parts of their job that they don't like and never talk about it because they get schools holidays off. Or that they shouldnt talk about parts of their jobs they don't like, because I can't have school holidays off.

Or object to teachers getting school holidays off because I don't. Or pointing out to teachers, that some people have it worse.

What job I do is entirely irrelevant to teachers.

@Hekatestorch

People who can't work from home, that come onto these threads to moan at people who can or do wfh, baffle me.

I can't imagine telling teachers, they should suck up parts of their job that they don't like and never talk about it because they get schools holidays off. Or that they shouldnt talk about parts of their jobs they don't like, because I can't have school holidays off.

Or object to teachers getting school holidays off because I don't. Or pointing out to teachers, that some people have it worse.

What job I do is entirely irrelevant to teachers.

I totally agree.

There’s also a lack of understanding with this attitude that it was actually helpful to the general pandemic situation that many people were able to wfh - because that meant less people on transport/using office spaces that others had to.

I really dislike the “ well it’s alright for you, you got to wfh - now stop moaning and get back to the office” posters. It’s narrow-minded.

@Hekatestorch
So that wasn’t a ‘thinly disguised’ pop at teachers?
‘I wouldn’t, but I just have in a rhetorical kind of way.’
I think we have to accept that the pandemic has had a negative impact on many people’s working lives, but some have ,without doubt, had it worse than others.
I still feel that people returning to their normal working pattern at this stage, having been on full pay throughout the crisis, have had it relatively easy.

People who couldn't wfh on average had jobs where interacting with people was important

People who don't like interacting with people , who find that hard , are more likely to chose jobs where it's not critical that they do

These people are more likely to be negatively affected by a return to a busy office environment

Wfh has shown them a better way for them to live and work

One that people lovers and people controllers and people who want to be centre of attention ( many managers ) all dislike

However introverts snd people who like quiet work should have as much right to a suitable work environment as all the rest

I’m having these conversations with my employees. As is DH (we own very different companies).
I think a lot of it depends what you do and how your team operate.
I’ve one member of staff who is desperate to continue WFH - I get it, she has a long commute. But TBH her work has gone way downhill and I think she needs to start bouncing off others again.

I don’t really object to WFH but I do hate the way any mention of the fact it impedes hugely on other family members or the fact that a lot of the time it’s not particularly conducive is leaped upon. I’ve seen some really awful comments here telling women to ‘get a job’ when they describe a life where they and children have to tiptoe around talking in hushed voices. Half the time they DO work anyway!

I am having to drive miles next week to see a HV so I can discuss things without my partner hovering around like Banquo’s ghost constantly. It’s awful.

[quote stitchinguru]@Hekatestorch
So that wasn’t a ‘thinly disguised’ pop at teachers?
‘I wouldn’t, but I just have in a rhetorical kind of way.’
I think we have to accept that the pandemic has had a negative impact on many people’s working lives, but some have ,without doubt, had it worse than others.
I still feel that people returning to their normal working pattern at this stage, having been on full pay throughout the crisis, have had it relatively easy.[/quote]
No. Actually, I just think teachers have a different role to me. Every job is different and most jobs have their good bits and not so good bits.

My point was it would be ridiculous for me to moan at teachers because of one aspect of their job. An aspect that would never be available to me because I don't do that Job.

I have no strong feelings about teachers holidays. It just a part of their job.

Who cares who has had it worse. Again, would it be on to go round threads telling people they can be down about anything g because someone had it worse? Or telling people who are happy, they shouldn't be because other people have it better?

Op didn't say she had it worse she said she is struggling with the environment. Your job, an NHS workers job, who had it worse is entirely irrelevant to wether people struggle going from a quiet environment to a busy one

I recognised your username and you aren’t happy at the company and didn’t really like a lot of the things that came with WFH for them either. I think you’d be best off leaving this company ASAP.

@Howshouldibehave
Mmm… well, that puts an interesting slant on the whole thing.
Maybe the OP (who describes herself as a mix of an introvert/extrovert….. a normal person?) just isn’t happy in her current role.

I do think a lot of people who have had to work outside the home throughout or even partly, are underestimating the mental strain on a lot of people to going back to offices and crowds.

If you've wfh in a busy household, that's very different to living alone and possibly only speaking face to face with another human once a week at the supermarket. Solitary confinement changes people. The OP has had that for over a year, and if working full time from home, hasn't been out and about at shops etc in crowds.

OP - be kind to yourself. Rejoining a busy crowded world after a year of being kept away and told that other people are a danger is going to be hard emotionally. Dont make major decisions yet. Give it a month.

Its also worth thinking that many of the extroverts in the office might be enjoying the novelty of having company to chat to face to face and will calm down after a few weeks. Its been tough on everyone, it was a sharp change in March 2020 and you have a sharp change back now.

A lot of jobs are a mix of things, I think.
Some of which can involve hours spent alone, other times client or team facing.
For example DH is a lawyer. Yes he can draft, take calls and zooms at home etc
But bringing new work to the business (a vital part of his role - the most vital part?) is hard from the house .

My work is the same. Some tasks done better from home. Some done far better on the office or on location.