Books that changed your life?

[Bluebellsinparadise]

Please tell me about the books that changed your life. I am going through a period of change/ growth and would love some inspiration! Name changed as feels very personal, but have been on here years (I’m not trying to push any books!).

These are mine:

The seven habits of highly effective people- Stephen Covey It was a revelation to me as a 20 something learning the habits that many people around me seemed to have learned from their (professional) parents - it positively helped me grow as a person too. Wish I’d have been taught these at school.

You are a Badass by Jen Sincero Wow this book had such a profound effect on me when I read it a few years ago. Lots of reviews seem to say similar. I became happier after struggling with mental health, my career skyrocketed in less than a year, I suddenly got treated with more respect, and I doubled my income. It had an incredibly empowering effect on me and helped me overcome imposter syndrome. I’m re-reading it now as I feel a bit stuck and already I’m having lots of new exciting opportunities present themselves to me. It’s also helping me overcome another period of self doubt.

So I’d love to hear your recommendations! They could be from any genre.... fiction to science or self help.

The four agreements

Reasons To Stay Alive Matt Haig.

Having always been a very positive optimistic person i suddenly found myself in the slough of despond, this book helped me to realise it can happen to anyone at any time, Also I was interested in how he decided not to go down the medication route (which caused some controversy I believe), but to heal himself slowly one tiny step at a time. Very thought provoking.

The Boy, The Mole, The Fox & The Horse by Charlie Mackesy.
Never has a book been able to calm me more when I needed it to.x

How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk. It transformed my parenting.

Lots of great books and stories of impact. Some I’ve heard of- but many are new to me. Going to spend this weekend reading blurbs and selecting next reads.

Thanks x

When things fall apart, by Pema Chodron.
Beautiful words and beautiful stories of experiences, it pretty much teaches you to embrace the pain in your failures and challenges you to grow. It’s the one which made the most sense during a break up and The one I go back to time and time again when I feel that things are actually falling apart!

Also she has a lovely soothing voice like listening to a friend so even better when listening to the audio version.

Shattered: Modern Motherhood and the Myth of Equality by Rebecca Asher. Also Playful Parenting by Laurence Cohen.

For those of you who recommend parenting books- does it make a difference if you partner is/isn’t on board? I have tried to get my partner to read books, but he is only motivated to read the ones he wants to read.

Woman who run with the wolves.
Just gave me such an understanding on how life is and how life can be. It is such an earthy and grounding book. I still dip into it during moments of need and it never fails to help me with a situation.

@Kiki275

The Boy, The Mole, The Fox & The Horse by Charlie Mackesy. Never has a book been able to calm me more when I needed it to.x

I read this with my 8yo and it makes me cry everytime.

For me it was Allen Carr (Easy way to stop smoking). I'm now 10 years and non smoker and I didn't have so much as a craving or a slip up.

In terms of impact, I'll say George Orwell Nineteen Eighty-Four. Read it for the first time over two decades ago and it has never stopped being so profound and prophetic to me.

I've just bought The Organised Mum Method so feel from a brief read that it will covert my routine and make me less stressed.

@HauteGirlSummer You must watch The Handmaid's Tale. It's an incredible piece of television. As much for the stunning design as anything else. Despite all the horror it just looks so beautiful. It's streaming on All 4 at the moment. I believe that Atwood is heavily involved in the production.

You Are Not So Smart by David McRaney. Its a pop psychology book I guess but it totally changed my mind on how our brains work and how we see the world.

For example in the event of a disaster (like a plane crash on a runway which is the example in the book) people don't always panic and run away from danger, they often freeze while their brains try to rationalise what's going on and place it in context to their other experiences. "It's not that bad, surely I'm overreacting". I think that would be the sort of thing I might do (I'm not great in stressful situations) so I try where possible to think through what I'd do in the event of an emergency as that can help quicken that process. Obviously you never know when an emergency is going to happen but you can do this for higher risk situations such as flights.

How to be sick - a Buddhist inspired guide for the chronically ill and their caregivers by Toni Bernhard. It helped me when my life was derailed unexpectedly by illness and disability. The lessons about finding happiness and fulfilment in whatever situation I am in will stick with me for life.

@Hazelnut5 that sounds like an incredibly helpful book for people in your position and makes me feel grateful for not needing it... maybe you sharing will help someone else who needs the support x

@MrsPumpkinSeed I’ve heard about the Organised mum but not read it. Is it easy to follow? I really need a new system as my youngest is about to start nursery and eldest doing more activities now. Life is becoming busier.

How to Talk so kids Will Listen - changed my parenting. And no, @Bluebellsinparadise I cannot for the life of me get my husband to read it. He continues to lecture the kids instead of listen to them and it drives me crazy.

I found He's Just Not That Into You in my twenties to be very useful in navigating dating and understanding men. It made me realise how simple men are, on the whole.

For those of you who recommend parenting books- does it make a difference if you partner is/isn’t on board? I have tried to get my partner to read books, but he is only motivated to read the ones he wants to read.

My dp has never read a parenting book, but he will listen to me talk about what I'm reading and he is roughly on the same page in values and parenting style.

@PamDenick

Caitlin Moran’s books… She just seems to be saying what my peers and are saying to each other, but in better prose.

But she also researched and brings things to our attention that expose the gender unfairness, such as…

Things that are tax deductible: childcare - no, golfing lessons / yes.

It reveals how the world is skewed towards men…

I love her book 'More Than A Woman.

Time to Think by Nancy Kline.

Should be mandatory leadership reading

I am currently reading How To Listen by Katie Columbus. It's based on the Samaritan's active listening style.
I've found that people are opening up to me way more, and even managed to get DH to talk much more. He's the taciturn type so that's a win for me. I thought I was quote a good listener but it appears I having been blocking him

Also How to talk so kids will listen.... Good for how you relate to anyone but also transformed my parenting.

The body keeps the score - helped me understand my brain and body's response to trauma and stopped me feeling it was my fault I still felt its effects.

@Noshowwithoutpunch

At Last A Life -Paul David. Existing for years in a haze of crippling anxiety I read this book and I can honestly say it improved my life.

Thank you. I have just bought this book on your recommendation. So sick of anxiety ruling my mind.

Wild by Cheryl Strayed (the book is fab, the film isn't great). Helped me understand and start to process my grief when it was really raw after my mum died.

Her book Tiny Beautiful Things is great as well, it is agony aunt letters, but really really profound ones.

The Women's Room, Marilyn French.