I had a call from HMRC....

[LynnThese4reSEXPEOPLE]

So today I had a call from a man from HMRC...
He said I was being investigated for tax fraud...
He said he could arrange a solicitor for me...
And when I said "How exciting!", he told me to "Fuck off"

I don't think he works for HMRC

I have had so many of these over the past year, more than I've ever had over the span of a decade prior.

It's usually the HMRC one but other recent twats claimed to be from carphone warehouse and Microsoft.

What I want to know is where do they get our numbers from? I'm on GiffGaff and I don't sign up to any random stuff online.

I also had the same HMRC one on my landline 4 years ago when I moved into a new place and got a new phone line. I hadn't give anybody the number

They always call from abroad too. Always have very distinctive accents and you can hear a load of others in the background, same accent, doing the same to other unsuspecting folk over the telephone.

If anybody wants a laugh then look up Jim Browning on YouTube. He's a tech whiz and has made it his mission to cause them as much inconvenience as possible / stop them scamming people. He hacks into their webcams and everything. Genius.

According to a voicemail left at 7.30am this morning I am wanted for crimes committed on the 'Northern Wales border' and they will use my national insurance number to prosecute me unless I press 1.

[quote Honestmary]@LynnThese4reSEXPEOPLE funnily enough, the last chap I spoke to didn’t seem that bothered that I had lost a leg, my eyesight and was in a coma, I mean, those are all fairly serious if you ask me. He just seemed to want to talk over me, even though I was in a coma, RUDE.[/quote]

I had one just today that said he was from a national energy saving company. Unfortunately he assumed he was talking to the home owner and I said I wasn’t. So he just hung up on me. I am actually the home owner, I was just pulling his leg but he didn’t give me a chance to say so. Shame, I was really interested in hearing what he had to say.

Disclaimer; this is about the fourth time they’ve called this week. It always starts with the same number and I keep blocking it but the bastards keep calling.

I had a call today from a very helpful chap who wanted to help me with my slow internet, I’m not very tech savvy so was delighted when he said he could do it for me , he gave me instructions on what to do so he could take control of my laptop. I don’t understand why he hung up after I couldn’t find the correct key to press despite asking him over and over again

[quote LynnThese4reSEXPEOPLE]@HadEnoughOfBears - it's almost like they are frustrated that you want some information rather than blindly handing over your bank details....[/quote]
It was almost like she didn't want to engage in a sexual fantasy with me...
To be fair though it was 11am and I was due on a teams call with my boss so I didn't probs have time anyways.

I mostly get the automated ones. Except the energy ones where I let them do their nonsense and then tell them I rent (I own the house).

Many many years ago I was nearly taken in by one of those google ones. I had a newborn and was sleep deprived. What the person on the other end of the phone didn’t know was our laptop was basically fucked. It took like 25 minutes to turn on, so I kept going on the phone to tell them it was still turning on. When caffeine hit my brain I realised google wouldn’t have my phone number and also wouldn’t care… I just said ‘oh the baby has had an explosive poo must go’ wasted a big chunk of their time though.

We kept getting calls at work, small open plan office, from a guy saying he was from BT and he needed the receptionist to log into her computer so that he could sort out the internet connection.

One of the guys in the office eventually said oh put it through to me I've got a spare hour so she did. Much fun was had as the company writes and sells software so our guy knew exactly how far to go and what to pretend he was doing.

Mr BT eventually put the phone down in a rage that he'd wasted so much time. 🤣

I like that touch about the solicitor. You should have played along to see what sort of idiot would have pretended to be the solicitor. I suspect the "solicitor's" function is to advise you that you're bang to rights and need to pay a fortune immediately to avoid a mahoosive prison sentence.

If a call comes in from a weird number, I usually just answer with ‘good morning, police fraud department’ in my best professional reception voice. They usually hang up.

Ive now twice had the one which begins "this is your bank". They tell me that $1400 has just been transferred out of the country from YOUR bank.

Does anyone here bank with YOUR bank????

I had this recently and listened to the message at the end of my lunch
I almost pressed one in panic as it sounded so official! Thank goodness I stopped

The thing that's mystifying me is that according to the frequent calls, BT will by now surely have cut off my Internet .... yet here I am.