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What are your school holiday rules?

52 replies

BikeRunSki · 28/07/2021 18:02

So I’ve got a month off work - largely leave that was cancelled last year due to our workload as an organisation. I thought it would be a good idea to take my leave over the schiol holidays, rather than the dc going to clubs, bubbles bursting etc.

I have 2 dc, ds(very nearly 13), dd (9). So far this is mostly what has happened:
DS - laid in bed, played in PS4, played on iPad.
Actually played a board game with me. Reluctantly took DM’s dog for a walk. Played on the PS4 with his mate. Made no effort to help with making foud, putting away washing, helping round tee hides at all. Pocket money has been stopped.

DD- screamed at me. Screamed at ds. Screamed at dh. Sulked. Refused to leave the house to talks dig out, so I had to stay In with her. Screamed and sulked some more.

I can’t do this for another month!

So what are your rules, I thinking of

Make your own breakfast
No gaming until you are dressed
No lunch unless you help

What else can I say?

OP posts:
MyDcAreMarvel · 28/07/2021 18:03

Maybe chill out a bit, why did you stop your dad pocket money am I missing something? And why do you need to get dressed to have a chill out day gaming?

MyDcAreMarvel · 28/07/2021 18:04

And the dog is your responsibility to walk why does your dd need to go?

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/07/2021 18:05

Ours are younger (7 and 10), but our rules are dressed/hair/teeth by 10am unless we have a day out booked.

Clear up after yourselves (but this is a standard rule anyways we all abide by)

If you cant say something nice to each other/cant play nice together, go and do something else.

  • - -

From what you have posted, the lounging in their rooms wouldnt bother me. If they dont normally help with food, why now? If they do normally, why have they refused?

9yo dd would have some serious consequences if she refused to leave the house - I wouldnt have stayed in with her

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Needaholiday101 · 28/07/2021 18:05

Teens here, daily exercise minimum 30 mins. 1 would be doing it anyway but the other needs some encouragement.

AdriannaP · 28/07/2021 18:05

Send them to a holiday club or do something fun with them. They sound bored

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/07/2021 18:05

@MyDcAreMarvel

And the dog is your responsibility to walk why does your dd need to go?
Oh I assumed here because 9yo might not be allowed to stay home alone yet
MyDcAreMarvel · 28/07/2021 18:06

Sorry ds

NotAnotherPushyMum · 28/07/2021 18:06

Not sure I’m a lot of help because all of our ‘rules’ sort of go out of the window in the summer holidays. Unless we have a ‘day out’ planned I tend to just leave them to do their own thing. Obviously the shouting and screaming isn’t acceptable, but if they want to stay in their pjs all day then I let them, they tend to eat breakfast and lunch when they want but again, they make their own and tidy up after themselves.

Willwebebuyingnumber11 · 28/07/2021 18:07

They sound bored stiff. What do you have planned for the remainder of your leave?

MyDcAreMarvel · 28/07/2021 18:07

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz I guess all 9 year olds are different but if no sen then a 9 should be ok for shirt time to walk a dog.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/07/2021 18:08

[quote MyDcAreMarvel]@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz I guess all 9 year olds are different but if no sen then a 9 should be ok for shirt time to walk a dog.[/quote]
We have only just started letting our 9yo stay home for short bursts. But I can understand why others may feel more comfortable waiting til 10yo.

UnbeatenMum · 28/07/2021 18:10

My older two are 10 and 12, they're allowed computer/TV time until 8:30am, after 6pm and 1 hour in the afternoon. They have to help clear up ther kitchen after dinner. That's it for rules but we're out and about most mornings/days.

Sirzy · 28/07/2021 18:11

Ds is 11.

My basics are shower at least 3 times a week and try to leave the house in some way at least every other day.

He is autistic though and needs the holidays to allow himself to calm

user1477249785 · 28/07/2021 18:12

Mine have to have had breakfast and got dressed before they get on line. Then we break the day into three segments and only one of them can be spent gaming. We have a jobs chart for the week. They choose which jobs to do up to a certain number of points and can do them whenever they like during the week. And I make sure I plan days out sporadically to break up the ennui.

TabithaTiger · 28/07/2021 18:19

Why did DS lose his pocket money? I can't really see what he did wrong.

What was the consequence of DD's behaviour?

I don't mind lounging about, but wouldn't put up with being screamed at and refusal to leave the house.

justcheckingreally · 28/07/2021 18:19

Is your nearly 13 year old just finished Y8? If so that's a hard age. A lot of changes and they age out of a lot of clubs.
I would definitely have a look for a club that they can do even for a couple hrs a day to give you an actual break too. You're not likely to find one that they can do both at the same time though. Most London councils are running free summer activities and I'm guessing that would be the case in most places thanks to covid funding. If I Google for eg Haringey summer fun, lots comes up.

It's also just the start of the holidays, I wouldn't expect that much of them but clubs do help.

HerrenaHarridan · 28/07/2021 18:22

I would step back from the power games and concentrate on finding activities that you GENUINELY enjoy to do with your kids, individually and as a family

Comedycook · 28/07/2021 18:24

Mine are 13/10. My ds is the elder...he sounds exactly like your ds! My youngest is an angel in comparison. I am pretty lax have given up I insist they get dressed... anything else is a bonus. Roll on September

TeenMinusTests · 28/07/2021 18:24

At that sort of age we had:

  • up by 9 (or 9:30 or something)
  • no electronics in morning
  • some kind of exercise every day
  • be helpful
If we didn't have some kind of structure it all went to pot.
Helenluvsrob · 28/07/2021 18:26

As regards housework - I don’t do it unless it needs doing , but when they were young it’s was “ right today the kitchen floor , the bathroom and the hoovering need doing “ no one gets to sit and play on tinternet etc till we ALL CAN . Who’s doing what ?

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 28/07/2021 18:26

we have no rules

lastcall · 28/07/2021 18:33

If my children screamed at me in such a manner they'd be cut off from the wifi instantly.

BikeRunSki · 28/07/2021 18:36

Not our dog, my mum’s dog, not even originally hers, left by a partner who went into rehab and never got in touch again. DM has recently moved several hundred miles to be closer us as she was feeling vulnerable on her own in her 80s. So the dog may be a separate issue.

I’m genuinely not trying to play power games. I’d just like the dc not to spend 6 weeks on the PS4 in their pyjamas. Maybe that is a power thing.

I have days out planned, and we have 5 days away in a couple of weeks. Just today wasn’t one of them. Spontaneity is a bit difficult at the moment!

OP posts:
PeonyTime · 28/07/2021 18:36

Noone up before 7am (although I had to remind the 12 yr old how to read a clock at 6.20 this morning...... - late starts are not an issue)

Teeshirt required for hot food (or the 10 yr old never wears more than a pair of PJ shorts).
Dishwasher to be emptied and refilled with breakfast stuff before tablets are allowed.
Exercise every day. Out of the house every other day if not isolating.
If you cant come up with a better idea, my suggestion goes - usually try and do something with them every other day - did nothing Mon. Went swimming yesterday. Met friends for a wander along the river and cake today. Nothing planned for tomorrow.

StepladderToHeaven · 28/07/2021 18:37

Mine are a bit older than yours. The youngest (age 11) gets bored if he's not active, so I've signed him up for a few football / cricket camps. They're all going sailing for a few days too. They organise social stuff themselves.

Rules - not many! Mainly around keeping going with their music practice over the summer. They each take a turn to cook / wash up the evening meal, as well as making their own breakfast and lunch every day.