My worst nightmare nearly happened this morning 😞

[purrswhileheeats]

I was reversing out of my driveway and almost ran over my neighbour's child, he was directly behind my car. He's no more than three years old and the only reason I saw him was he was waving his arms in the air and I saw them in my rear view mirror. He's so tiny I wouldn't have seen him otherwise as he was below the level of the back window IFYSWIM. My neighbour was loading stuff into his boot so I beeped the horn and shouted to him, he ran over, grabbed the boy and took him inside.

I was shaking and crying (sorry, that's so MN) when I got to work. They're a new family on the estate, only moved in a few months ago. The dad must've known the boy was playing outside while he was loading the car but didn't bother to check where he was.

I'm waiting for them to come home so I can go and speak to them. It's so horrible, I feel sick thinking about what could have happened.

Not your fault at all, OP. Parents should look after their kids if they have them, not expect everybody else to look out for them all the time.

@purrswhileheeats

Am I an entitled white British woman because I want to speak to my Romanian neighbours about nearly running over their child? I don't want to berate them fgs.

I don't live in the UK BTW. Our estate is a mix of Greeks, British, Russians, Cypriots, Romanians and Syrians and we all get along well.

Not being arsey, but what are you actually wanting to say to them then?

You've already said the dad was probably more shocked than you, do you think he's just going to wave the 3 year old off out the door again tomorrow?

It’s extremely worrying that so many people on this thread can’t understand how or why reversing into the drive is so much safer.

@flapjackfairy

Well presumably you could run over them just the same when reversing onto the drive.

Exactly!!

A few posters seem to think it’s the OPs fault for not reversing in, where the exact same thing could happen….

No, it’s not the OP’s fault at all. The fault lies with the dad for not paying attention to where his 3 year old was. Had the OP not seen him flapping his arms it could have been a very difficult outcome.

Moral of the story. Don’t take your eyes off 3 year olds near roads!!

Not sure why people are fixating about reversing off the drive, it’s a red herring as he could have walked out in front of a car coming out frontwards

Neighbours need to supervise their child properly is the actual solution. If he was too fall in a neighbours swimming pool and drown, it’s not their fault for having a pool

@MotionActivatedDog

It’s extremely worrying that so many people on this thread can’t understand how or why reversing into the drive is so much safer.

indeed, you'd think anyone with common sense would get it, but existing drivers?

It is hugely safer to reverse into car parking spots (on your drive, at a supermarket etc.) and then drive forwards out of them.

It’s a bugger to load heavy shopping bags into the car if I reverse into the space in a supermarket car park. And unlike the P&C parking, the spaces aren’t extra-wide.

OP won’t make that mistake again, whichever way she chooses to park, she’ll be hyper vigilant.

Parents should supervise their children appropriately,
it took me years not to stress out when I saw prats oblivious to the dangers around their children, or watching smugly as their child was endangered by their stupidity.

@MagicSummer

Not your fault at all, OP. Parents should look after their kids if they have them, not expect everybody else to look out for them all the time.

Yeah. Drivers have no obligation not to mow down anyone who happens to be in their way. None whatsoever.

God these comments.
We physically CAN’T reverse into our driver as you can’t get out of the driver side if you do

Why can’t you get out the driver’s side?

@EL8888

Not sure why people are fixating about reversing off the drive, it’s a red herring as he could have walked out in front of a car coming out frontwards

Neighbours need to supervise their child properly is the actual solution. If he was too fall in a neighbours swimming pool and drown, it’s not their fault for having a pool

It's really not a red herring. It's well known road safety issue.

Your odds of hitting someone if you reverse into a space are much lower than your odds of hitting someone if you reverse out.

Not sure why people are fixating about reversing off the drive, it’s a red herring as he could have walked out in front of a car coming out frontwards

Seriously? Visibility at the front is far better than at the rear.

Reversing cameras? You can fit then quite easily if your car doesn’t come with them fitted already.

@MorganSeventh

But there's no guarantee that the kid won't be behind them if they reverse in, either, if the parents are letting them play around on the driveway unsupervised.

At last, someone putting the blame where it really belongs, the dopey parent who wasn't watching their child.

OP was the child on your driveway or the pavement? Either way an awful shock for you and glad things turned out to avoid a serious accident.

I don't know actually, I just wanted to tell him to be more careful. I wasn't banging on the door shouting at his grandmother lol.

It was a horrible experience and not one I want to repeat.

@MotionActivatedDog

It’s extremely worrying that so many people on this thread can’t understand how or why reversing into the drive is so much safer.

Almost as worrying that so many people seem unable to lay the blame where it belongs, with the parent.

@sycamore54321

What a horrible shock and thank heavens all is well.

However, you cannot attempt to shift blame in any way to the parents. You are the one moving a large heavy machine, it’s legally entirely your responsibility to ensure you do it safely. You should be nothing other than apologetic - you cannot blame the parents.

Reversing into your drive is far safer - you will have driven past it immediately beforehand so you have a clear idea of what is there, and the potential areas of where a child could appear are much smaller - only directly from the right or left. Reversing out means a much wider arc from which a child could appear. Plus you are a moving car and so more visible to anyone; whereas reversing out means you are starting as a stationary car and so less obvious a danger. The angle of approach is different also and helps visibility - when reversing out you go straight out for longer. It’s not foolproof but it’s definitely safer to reverse in (and it’s the rules of the road - you reverse from the major road into the minor road, not the other way round. Same goes for parking spaces in a car park. Far safer to reverse in.

If you can’t get reversing camera retro-fitted, you could also consider a convex mirror on the pillar or edge of your drive.

I hope you get over the shock in time. It must have felt horrible. I know that sounds like a lecture above, but please do take a lesson from this horrible situation. And thankfully everyone is unhurt.

However, you cannot attempt to shift blame in any way to the parents. You are the one moving a large heavy machine, it’s legally entirely your responsibility to ensure you do it safely. You should be nothing other than apologetic - you cannot blame the parents

Bollocks!! If the child was supervised it would not have happened.

If a child runs on to a main road then it wouldn’t be the drivers fault, as there would be nothing they could do fast enough.

If the OP had posted that she was speeding or drink-driving and nearly hit a child, no-one would have sympathy regardless of how badly supervised the 3 year old was.

The problem is that the OP was doing something which lots and lots of people do (whether out of laziness or incompetence), and people cannot cope with the thought that they would also be thought of as an unsafe driver. So they place all the blame on the 3 year old's parents.

This is why dangerous drivers are very rarely successfully prosecuted - the jury relates to them too much.

Yes, the 3 yr old should have been supervised, but the OP should also have made sure to drive as safely as possible.

You should always reverse in for this exact reason. It's so dangerous reversing out into the road.

Almost as worrying that so many people seem unable to lay the blame where it belongs, with the parent.

I’m not sure you’ve read the thread tbh if you think people haven’t blamed the parent.

Even reversing into a driveway is not 100% safe. I collect a work colleague and I was reversing in when her neighbours opened the door and her toddler ran straight out and over the colleagues driveway behind me . Luckily like the OP i was taking care and did not hit him but it shook me up . The neighbours did nothing .

Op you are not in the wrong here and those that say she as are unreasonable.
You can’t just let toddlers run around on the road, the op was reversing carefully as you do as let’s be honest it may have been a animal or anything but the fact she saw her quickly terrified the op as you do .
Buy instead people say well yes reverse in next time , great advice hopefully the neighbours child doesn’t run out that time too .

The Dad is 100% to blame for not keeping track of his 3 year old.