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Original poster

What is this obsession by the Mumsnet police?

63 replies

TwwSunset · 22/07/2021 19:41

I often find it amusing how many posters will do all they can to ‘expose’ a poster if they’ve posted more than once and NC. Why is this? The remarks are often catty, ‘are you going to keep posting,’ ‘are you the poster from this link...’, etc etc.

I never understand it. Why post or comment if this post isn’t of interest to you? Why not just hide it?

I’ve seen similar threads before and thought it must be the same poster but I’ve either provided what I hoped to be a supportive post or simply hid the thread if it irritated me!

OP posts:
AdaFuckingShelby · 22/07/2021 19:44

Yes, this does my head in too. Cross checking posts like they're in charge. They obviously don't have enough to do.

Original poster
TwwSunset · 22/07/2021 19:46

@AdaFuckingShelby it honestly amazes me. The time they must spend thinking it over and THEN having so little in their lives they go digging and send links etc. I feel sorry for the poor posters who are just looking for advice, being told they shouldn’t be posting on what is a public forum !

OP posts:
Abouttoblow · 22/07/2021 19:48

It's like a "club". There are posters who consider themselves in charge or the "head girls" if you like. You spot the same people doing it constantly. I just think they haven't got a lot going on elsewhere and see their monitoring of MN users as something that gives them some purpose.

They're best ignored.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Viviennemary · 22/07/2021 19:49

Its the one thing that annoys me most about MN. Constant name changing. Hardly any names recognisable now. Nice to see one or two familiar ones.

Original poster
TwwSunset · 22/07/2021 19:50

@Abouttoblow

It's like a "club". There are posters who consider themselves in charge or the "head girls" if you like. You spot the same people doing it constantly. I just think they haven't got a lot going on elsewhere and see their monitoring of MN users as something that gives them some purpose.

They're best ignored.

@Abouttoblow 😂 agree!
OP posts:
AdaFuckingShelby · 22/07/2021 19:51

I've name changed lots of times to avoid the MN police. They got me a few names ago, quoted me back at myself but had totally missed the context. Couldn't be added to argue.

AdaFuckingShelby · 22/07/2021 19:52

They're probably searching me right now to make a point...

IcedSpice · 22/07/2021 19:52

For me it's like, if this poster constantly posts the same thing, again and again, what's the point in replying with the same thing as the op obviously doesn't want to pay any heed to what people write and its a giant waste of time

Or the "I'm a single parent of 23 and can't feed my guinea pig, and can't drive, and can't work" and someone will a/s and last week op was 19 year old super model on a yacht in the Caribbean

romdowa · 22/07/2021 19:54

To be fair there have been certain posters who post the same thing over and over and over and never take any advice at all. People's patience wears a bit thin after a while when people refuse to help themselves.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 22/07/2021 19:54

if you see it happening just report them.
we are not supposed to bring in stuff from other threads/posts precisely because what happens in Vegas should stay in Vegas.

people can perfectly well give advice on one subject without being told they shouldn't because they were needing help about something else before.
I hate those fuckers who just want to stir up shit.
I don't ever reply to them, I just report their sorry arses

Original poster
TwwSunset · 22/07/2021 19:57

@romdowa

To be fair there have been certain posters who post the same thing over and over and over and never take any advice at all. People's patience wears a bit thin after a while when people refuse to help themselves.
@romdowa but surely you just hide the thread if it is so irritating? Isn’t that easier than researching previous posts and engaging further with the OP? Who could be in a bad place anyway and could do without being called out on posting again on a forum that is open to the public Confused
OP posts:
Polkadots2021 · 22/07/2021 19:58

[quote TwwSunset]@AdaFuckingShelby it honestly amazes me. The time they must spend thinking it over and THEN having so little in their lives they go digging and send links etc. I feel sorry for the poor posters who are just looking for advice, being told they shouldn’t be posting on what is a public forum ![/quote]
Yeah I agree. People should just be cool and support each other.

Schrutesbeets · 22/07/2021 19:58

Also can't stand the people who have name changed but prove they're long term posters by quoting MN classics... Cringe!

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 22/07/2021 19:59

There was one the other day about a dog. It got quite heated on both sides, OP wasn't really answering any question and an A/S turned up a poster who was pregnant with twins and a 3yr old & 1yr old. OP then tried to play dumb.

That's really fucking annoying, proves the troll and everyone can step away.

I think it has its up sides as well as it's down sides tbh.

romdowa · 22/07/2021 20:00

There was one poster in particular that you didn't even need to research. It was posted about every couple of days. Honestly if you are in a bad place then the Internet really isn't the place to be. As you stated this is open to the public and if you post , you are leaving yourself open to receiving all sorts of replies. Nobody here is able to act in the capacity of a mental health professional. I've never said that I police threads but i can see sometimes why people do in certain circumstances

PegasusReturns · 22/07/2021 20:02

I think it’s pretty rare for posters to advance search and people generally consider it unacceptable.

What is acceptable is challenging and rolling metaphorical eyes at the handful of posters who post the same story again and again over several months desperate for a different perspective.

AlternativePerspective · 22/07/2021 20:02

If name changing wasn’t so easy MN wouldn’t have nearly the amount of trolls they do.

But there are posters who will name change and post word for word what they’ve posted previously, except they’ll omit some crucial detail which would change the opinion of those giving advice. If you’ve read the same post 10 times under 10 different names then you probably don’t even need to search to find the discrepancy.

Also there are posters who post different threads with different details. So e.g. there was a poster earlier this week who posted something, I genuinely can’t remember what it was, but she made reference to having a 1 year old and a 3 year old. For whatever reason someone had looked at previous posts and it turned out she’d posted previously (within the past 2 weeks) asking for advice weaning her 6 month old, and another post saying she was pregnant with twins.

It makes the post you’re posting completely irrelevant if the person is clearly just posting a load of made up crap in the meantime… (thread was deleted fwiw).

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 22/07/2021 20:04

Isn’t that easier than researching previous posts and engaging further with the OP? Who could be in a bad place anyway and could do without being called out on posting again on a forum that is open to the public confused

Not necessarily. Surely it's better to spot the pattern and the poster needs to hear that repeatedly posting the same stuff and repeatedly getting responses they don't like is a. bad for their mental health and b. professional help would be better.

Original poster
TwwSunset · 22/07/2021 20:05

@AlternativePerspective but why does anyone care?! I can imagine feeling mildly annoyed if I had posted something supportive on one thread, only to find it may not have been the real circumstances on the next thread. But it would be a spilt second thought/feeling of annoyance. I’m aware that anyone can post what they want so it’s up to me if I want to contribute anything. I really can’t get my head around posters getting up in arms about someone posting repeatedly about something, just hide thread and get on with your day, surely

OP posts:
DancesWithTortoises · 22/07/2021 20:05

It's a bit mean girls in the playground, isn't it?

Original poster
TwwSunset · 22/07/2021 20:06

@MilkTwoSugarsThanks it’s never done in a nice way!

Yes @DancesWithTortoises exactly mean girls in a playground

OP posts:
AlternativePerspective · 22/07/2021 20:07

Isn’t that easier than researching previous posts and engaging further with the OP? Who could be in a bad place anyway and could do without being called out on posting again on a forum that is open to the public confused not necessarily. If a poster has posted several threads with several different stories on which can’t possibly be a case of having just changed a minor bit of detail, then challenging them on that means other posters aren’t going to waste their time engaging and possibly even sharing their own personal stories with someone who is clearly a troll.

Jailbreak42 · 22/07/2021 20:08

@romdowa

To be fair there have been certain posters who post the same thing over and over and over and never take any advice at all. People's patience wears a bit thin after a while when people refuse to help themselves.
This is mainly the reasons behind it.

Or people won't get the sympathy/answers they want, so will change their story in an attempt to get it.

There is a regular poster who comes on once a week. She always name changes. She is in a custody dispute with her ex partner. She comes on giving her sob story, but always forgets to mention all of the bad things or stuff that doesn't portray her in a positive light. Not does she take on any advice given. In these circumstances, I think it is fair to the people responding know the full story, not the bullshit.

user1745 · 22/07/2021 20:09

It's not just a Mumsnet thing. Many people love nothing better than to bring others down and "expose" them. Some of them are on Mumsnet.

Maria53 · 22/07/2021 20:09

Schools bullies out of a job? That's how they get their kicks?

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