How has Mumsnet ruined you?

[lemonsandgingerbeer]

Sat down to watch some Netflix with DP.

I asked him : "What are you watching?"

He replied: "It's called Mind of Aaron Hernandez"

Cue me spluttering with laughter because all I can think about is "Good afternoon, I'm Angela Hernandez". "No, I"M Angela Hernandez"

Given that the documentary is about some quite gruesome murders, DP was.... bemused, to say the least.

What has Mumsnet ruined for you?

What will you never look at / hear in the same way again?

pom bears
cutted up pear
lemon drizzle cake

all of my kids use the term "halfwidge" when they make one

in the months before Christmas I hear maryz grumbling in my ear and whenever I see the phrase "disabled toilet" I feel my inner SM getting outraged.

On the plus side I have a craftroom full of yarn and a heart full of friends thanks to Woolly Hugs. ❤❤

@haveibeencaughtout

Mumsnet trans peaked me. I had no idea before.

Quite. I just don’t understand all the new confusing identities especially the hard to figure fluid ones. Mind blowing being a mum as who can guarantee what happens when your little boy or girl grows up! I never thought there could be such a rainbow of options. What happened in the past?

oh and I'm so grateful for the phrase 'spoonyfucker'.
Without @HoneyDragon I couldn't accurately describe it when DH interferes.

@WorriedWishingWell I’m trying to work out whether you are being serious or not? I think you are still living with your lovely husband who happens to leave his socks on the floor?

The Sistine Chapel.

@WorriedWishingWell

I once posted to express my mild irritation that DH had left his dirty socks on the bathroom floor rather than placing them in the laundry basket provided. I immediately followed the MN advice: got my paperwork in order, hid the children's passports, took in ironing to supplement my income, and LTB - or rather, changed the locks to prevent him returning home that night. It was obvious to me from the advice given on my thread that he was a controlling, adulterous misogynist and that the fact he bought me a bunch of flowers on my first birthday after we met was a clear red flag or example of love-bombing. Sometimes I think back to the loving, sweet, hard working husband and father I believed he was - until other MN posters opened my eyes of course.

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Hearing wood pigeons cooing and saying to myself 'my toe hurts Betty' in rhyme to their coo - thanks to you mumsnet bastards I can never unhear it 🤣

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba

oh and I'm so grateful for the phrase 'spoonyfucker'. Without *@HoneyDragon* I couldn't accurately describe it when DH interferes.

Me too! My DH finally admitted that he's a spoonyfucker when I was boiling a pan of water to warm up PFB's paddling pool. He walked over, lifted the lid (of the non-boiling water) and TURNED IT DOWN. He is a bona-fide spoonyfucker, luckily he has redeeming qualities!

It's turned me into a feminist killjoy

Seriously though it's opened my eyes to just how fucking fantastic women are, and how not enough of us actually realise that. And that not enough women set their bar anywhere as high as it should be in relationships.

@LongLiveGoblingKing

I used to be able to hear someone say 'pardon' when they had not heard and have no reaction. Now I have to stop myself screaming "it's what, not pardon!"

Really? Why?

Mnet opened my eyes to how blissfully / willfully ignorant of racial issues some people in the UK are.

@LongLiveGoblingKing

I used to be able to hear someone say 'pardon' when they had not heard and have no reaction. Now I have to stop myself screaming "it's what, not pardon!"

Someone said "pardon, not what" to my DS the other day. Was not amused!!

It's not a case of being ruined, but MN has opened my eyes to the massive twats most men are, and also equipped me with knowledge to give limited advice and recognise red flags. This knowledge has recently helped me advise a friend (who is not on MN). She was complaining about her new-ish BF, and I highlighted every red flag to her and she was shell shocked. She's ditched him now and so glad for it (he was becoming increasingly emotionally abusive).

MN has made me realise how low my bar was, and I've hoiked it right up.

I was around on a different account at the time of penis beaker and to this day I can't see a glass in the room without thinking about it and having a chuckle.

Lemon Drizzle cake, can't see someone purchase, eat or offer me a slice of one without thinking 'Lemon Drizzle Bitch'.

@LeanneBrownsLonelyBraincell

I now suffer from Roast Chicken Inadequacy

Is ‘what?’ better than ‘pardon?’ How is ‘pardon?’ wrong? …I usually say ‘sorry?’ Is that acceptable?

I'd forgotten about the fat ball/scotch egg incident until this thread. I'm sniggering away again now!

Never used to swear, now I swear like a trooper!! Liberating!

It's opened my eyes to how utterly petty and shallow most women are and made me understand why some men hold the female sex in utter contempt.

@Lowhum

Center Parcs

Yup!

@Tiari

Never used to swear, now I swear like a trooper!! Liberating!

@Tiari

🤣
I've always been a sweary fucker, but MN helped me improve my vocabulary; where else would you find wankbadger and cockwomble?

@Lowhum

Center Parcs

Yes! We’re going in September and I keep making anal jokes at DH and then remembering it’s a mumsnet thing not an everyone thing

On a more serious note it’s definitely influenced the things I get bosom-hoiking about, in a negative way. I was brought up in a house that was so ‘lower middle class aspirational to be upper middle class’ and there was so much strictness about the ‘right’ way to do something. DH doesn’t care about that stuff at all despite coming from a similar background to me and I feel quite torn between things like using a knife correctly and eating in the street etc - between his view ‘does it really, honestly matter?’ and my mum’s ‘well, you can tel who was brought up properly..’ The more time I spend on MN the more I feel myself turning towards my mum’s side for that stuff, and I don’t like it.

@Tiari

Never used to swear, now I swear like a trooper!! Liberating!

Fuck off, you cunt

Thanks for kind of proving my point, FeministKilljoyOlympicWinner.

Sigh.