Old (good) friend from uni had her second child last October.
We live in different countries so not much chance to see one another. We used to talk on the phone once every couple of months, but the gaps in between chats had been getting longer since she had her first.
I sent a little care package when the new baby was born with some bits for both kids and a box of her favourite chocolates for her.
Since then, we've had one brief chat on the phone, mid-spring time. I've not wanted to keep messaging her because she'd been saying how flat out she was with both kids and had no time for anything, and thought she'd let me know when she felt she had the headspace.
I was thinking of her the other day, though, and dropped her a little text saying:
"Miss you, . Hope everyone's happy and well - was thinking of you today and would be lovely to catch up soon."
I got a message back later that day saying
"If you missed me, you could have called me. Having kids isn't contagious"
I'm really shocked and sad. I don't have kids and don't want them, and she knows that, but I don't dislike them or people who choose to have them.
Was giving her space an insensitive thing to do? Could I have made her feel like I didn't care by not being in touch? Part of me's annoyed at her message, but I'm doubting myself, too.