What's the best wedding you went to?

[NoEffingWaytoSurvive]

Getting married in a few years, and there are so many options to make it a fun evening. From singing waiters (who knew?!) to having magicians (not my thing but can see the appeal) the world is my lobster.

What did you have (or have the pleasure at someone else's) that made the day more fun? And what was a complete waste of money?

My first wedding, I spent hours putting jellly beans in small bags which no one even noticed. Wish I had put more into the food which was a bit shite.

What was a complete waste of money? Both weddings - the big one with all the millions of people and the small intimate one with just 12 of us.

@Wearywithteens

“ChikkaChikkaChikkaCha I find wedding threads on mumsnet so depressing and judgy. You should plan your wedding to please yourself; it's your day. Not everyone will like it, but guess what, we all like different things! Who cares!”

Hit a nerve has it?

No....some people told us our wedding was the best they had ever been to. Other people hated it because it was too informal. That's my point, you will never please everyone. Just do what you want

Very best was :

Village hall
Free bar (bride’s father was a publication)
Ceilidh band
Everybody mixed
Lots of kids.
A fish and chip van pulled up about 9pm with rolls and sausage (if you’re Scottish you’ll understand how welcome that is!)

All helped by a lovely summer’s night and people could mill around outside.

Loved my own wedding for different reasons. Small and informal, almost whole family there (from 5 months to 75 years), lovely buffet and nice drinks, background music so people could talk rather than dancing. Did have a bit of disco and tried a Strip the Willow but that got dangerous! Finished off with Loch Lomond and Auld Lang Syne. Perfect.

Our friends wedding was fabulous & more like a mini festival. They hired a field, lots of marquee tents, 2 stages for the 6 bands that played, a camping area if you wanted to stay over & coaches to get you in & out of town to the field on the hour if you didn't. Hog roast, burger van, sushi bar & pizza & salads, ice creams and, sweets van for the kids & 3 bars. It was helped along by glorious weather, but it was well covered for rain too if needed.

@Hen2018

No all day events. No one is that interested.

Speak for yourself!

I bloody love a wedding. Any wedding. Don't care if it's an all-day affair, just an evening or a whole bloody weekend. They are fun and an excuse to get dressed up and relax.

Never been to one I didn't like.

One I went to had a barn dance with a band and caller, everyone was up dancing, good fun.

Went to a fabulous wedding where they had a full size carousel in the garden. Everyone loved it.

Unfortunately the couple are no longer together but their wedding was amazing.

A weekend summer one in Sorrento with the wedding day being held at the very best hotel in town. Utterly divine. Truly a moment to remember.

We had a ceilidh which was a good way of getting everyone dancing before the DJ

Our church was near the venue. We had waiters outside the church with a few bottles of water/wine while the photographer ran around taking paparazzi style shots. Everyone walked to the venue following a piper! grin
Once at the venue there was a buffet in the garden for starters, a seated main course and a desert buffet in the dining room.
We had swing music on an ipod after where everyone danced up a storm, old and young. Worked really well as all the movement got people socializing.
We decided early on that the day was not about us per se but about eveyone who would come to cellebrate us. So we chanelled all our budget into a simple but slendid menu, restricted but free flowing good quality drinks, no hen/stag and so on. Worked a treat.

A wedding ball. Black tie and fancy frocks! Live music and a buffet. Wedding was as late as it could be. No day/night so just everyone (kids and all). Live music.

Relaxed weddings that reflect the couple are the best. One of my favourites was the registry do of some anarchist friends - bride wore black trousers and shirt, groom had his ever-present baseball cap on, reception in a broken-down East End pub. Great fun.

I can say the main thing not to do, and that is - don't have long, formless periods without food. If rooms have to be changed over between sections, ensure there are seats, snacks as well as drinks and ideally some kind of activity, even if it's a jazz band in the background, a singalong with someone on guitar (seen that done very successfully), speeches or something. But 1-2 hour thumb-twiddly bits do sometimes happen and they are quite tedious.

Also try not to have massive long sessions of bride/groom/family photos in the middle, certainly not unless you have something planned for everyone else. Our wedding photographer (wisely) only put a short familly photo session period aside for this reason but I've been at weddings where hosts are out for ages doing photos.

Just remembered, I loved a wedding that was ceremony mid-morning, wedding lunch then dancing and all over by 4 or 5pm. Ended up with couple at bride's parents' house chilling out and eating bagels in the evening. Had we had a local wedding rather than an out of town one, I'd totally have suggested similar timing.

Background music, no enforced dancing and a relaxed dress code sounds perfect to me. Not keep on ceilidhs, barn dances, bands unless there is space away from them too.

[quote NoEffingWaytoSurvive]@iminthegarden I do get that some people might not want to do that, but it's a way to ensure everyone has something they like to drink. I would struggle to replicate the bar of my local in terms of spirits to cater to everyone's taste. Probably a lot cheaper than paying £10 for a warm glass of crappy wine! [/quote]
That will be very expensive.

You could try broad sweeps - a good white wine, a good red, and so on. Less choice but very good choice.

Wedding of a good friend before any of us had children. It was in the hills above Barcelona in December on a stunning sunny day. Father of the bride paid for the bar all night and he had a massive budget. Us friends from England all stayed in the same hotel and spent about 3 or 4 days in Barcelona afterwards. Lovely.

I guess they’re fairly common now or at least well known but I was at a wedding with a candy bar where you could make up a little bag with sweets and also a photo booth with costumes. For me they were something new which I found fun but I see them recommended on different wedding sites.

I’m getting married next year so it’s good to see this thread. Though I’m just doing a small causal wedding.

Things which have made a wedding relaxed and a fun day include:

1. No speeches, just the groom standing up, raising his glass and thanking everyone for coming.
2. Children invited too, goodie bags for all the children which were very popular.
3. Having a choice of alcoholic / non-alcoholic drinks on arrival, together with a good selection of canapés.
4. Informal seating arrangements which meant everyone could circulate and talk to everyone they wishes too.

The best wedding I went to was also the most expensive one. It was like a famous persons wedding. Abroad. It was so good because we were all so well looked after. Free food and alcohol, music, transport. Even though it was about them, it was also about us as guests, and we were treated like kings.

I also really liked the humanist ceremony as it was fun and personal unlike the religious ones I’ve been to which were stuffy (and homophobic in one case). Although that’s obvious personal.

Best wedding we went to was my brothers. Register office on a lovely sunny day in August. Then a really chilled buffet at a local social club, with a night do at the same place. It was so chilled and relaxed, that everyone had an amazing time. Just shows you don't have to spend a load of money. We have been to weddings that cost 10 times that much, that weren't as good

I really wanted an evening wedding with candles in the church( think Four Weddings Scottish one) but when I got quotes for the reception at hotels, they wanted to charge for the whole day as they’d be losing out, so we ended up going traditional. It was exhausting.

Mine.

Everybody invited to stay as long as they liked (some stayed several days). Same church as my parents. Venue was family home and the reception was an informal garden party. Barn dance, free bar, loads of guests, children running around and in the pool. The weather was superb, 30 degrees +, and the party didn't end until dawn.

mine

Best bits about weddings I've loved - one venue all day, enough space to move around, informal. My favourite reception ever was in a village hall, tressel tables all along the hall, food liked in the middle, no seating plan. Just sit and eat. They did have caterers. But free bar - help yourself from the fridges. Short speeches. Lovely lovely day.

I obviously pinched the bits I liked Bout that for ours. We did our own bar - plenty of fizz, wine, beers and soft drinks. We did have a few bottles of spirits- some bought with specific guests in mind and we pointed them in the direction of those. Loads of food. Entertainment for the kids. We were blessed with a gorgeous day. Short photos. No speeches. Just relax and enjoy.

You need to think about your guests as well as you and what works for them. How can you ensure they will enjoy it. You know your friends and family so it's not too hard. Bit equally you will never please everybody but really the guests should be there because they love you and want to wish you well.