What stupid accidents have you had?

[boomchikawowwow]

I always seem to have stupid injuries for one reason or another.

This evening I thought I almost smashed my teeth out from a drinking glass. My tooth still feels sore now

I'm always covered in burn marks from taking things out of the oven.

Who else is accident prone?

[knickerelasticgonetwang]

I managed to stand on a solid spud the scarecrow. The nose went through the bottom of my foot and you could see the tip at the top. The emergency staff giggled at it. My shoe filled with blood and I still have the scar to prove it

[Imissmoominmama]

I once stapled my dress to my stomach whilst attempting to put the safety catch on a wall stapler…

[LongTimeMammaBear]

Years ago, live in another house with a very sunny kitchen. Came in from the gym and started my regular Saturday household cleaning routine which included cleaning the hob (rings and all). Unbeknownst to my, my DH had used the hob to boil an egg, went into dining room to eat his boiled egg but forgot to turn of the gas. I didn’t see the gs was still in, lifted the ring - which of course stuck to my fingers and palm. Fast trip to local walk in centre with my hand in a bowl of ice water. Thank goodness we had that. Weeks of going there to change bandages but no scars.

Stepped out of my car, parked in a somewhat raised parking spot. Hadn’t appreciated how much higher I was when stepping out, foot hit ground harder, tilted and resulted in multiple breaks of foot and ankle requiring plates and pins.

Closed car door on my thumb, breaking it. Did it again the next year too!

[SingingInTheShithouse]

Too many to mention, but a few ive done are...

Cracked 3 ribs having a giggling fit under a Xmas tree at a party. It set me off sneezing & my drunk ass still couldn't stop giggling & I cracked ribs

Tore my calf muscle stepping off our stairs at home

Slashed my foot open needing 6 stitches by tripping over my cat & ended up kicking the mirror

Burnt my stomach & it wouldn't heal for months because I was daft enough to use my steam press when naked🥴

[SingingInTheShithouse]

@Iheartmysmart
"The horse I was riding bolted, went under a low tree which caught me across the top of my riding hat, I came off backwards broke my collarbone, wrist and knocked myself unconscious. Came too with my sister poking me with a stick asking if I was dead."


I did almost exactly as a 12yo. Only seems I got off lightly with a broken arm & sprained ankle & it was a friend poking me with a stick to see if I was still alive 🥴😂

[thanksforallthewhales]

dropped my keys getting out of the car, bent down to pick them forgetting car door was open and ended up with a black eye after catching it on corner of the door

[GrannyWeatherwaxsBroomstick]

My Grandfather was a menace with electricity, he “mended” my Grandmother’s iron and gave her an electric shock. Then “fixed it properly” and. She tried it again - another shock. She did know that he was clueless.

I have posted this before, but I fell off my bike and fractured my wrist, got a lightweight cast and told to stay off my bike. The next week I fell off a horse and broke my cast, this time I ended up with a big cast all the way up my arm.
I also fell off a horse because I was sitting sideways on the saddle and just rolled down the horse’s bum onto the floor. That time I broke my arm.

I walked into a barbed wire fence that I had ducked under many times, if I had been any shorter I would have taken an eye out.

[fussychica]

Fell out of a window at school about 50 years ago. Was probably my most bizarre accident. Fortunately the domestic science class had been moved from the first floor to the ground floor due to converting to natural gas or I probably wouldn't be alive to type this.
Electric shock from a kettle at uni, threw me across the room.
Broke my foot wearing flip flops on uneven ground on my birthday!

[Sweetpea1532]

Has anyone ever gotten a laugh when thinking of the poor medical examiner pathologist if your body is examined for an autopsy after your death?
"Wow! What on Earth happened to this person during life? Multiple fractures, odd shaped scars in the strangest places?"
Makes me laugh every time I perform one of my clutzy injurious stunts

[sueelleker]

[quote Marriedatfirstyear]@Iheartmysmart
The horse I was riding bolted, went under a low tree which caught me across the top of my riding hat, I came off backwards broke my collarbone, wrist and knocked myself unconscious. Came too with my sister poking me with a stick asking if I was dead.

🤣🤣[/quote]
I did something similar-I was wearing a riding hat, but still gave myself concussion and had to spend the night in hospital (being woken up every half hour to check my pupils)

[Zoorhik]

When my two children were about 4 and 5; I was up a ladder trying to use an electric hedge trimmer. Ladder moved and I fell ripping a lot of skin off my forearm and hurting both legs. Called the children to come and help and get mummy’s phone. Children came over very slowly, looked at me, and then went back to playing! I had to crawl inside to get phone. I’ve stabbed through the soft bit on my hand between thumb twice. Have been head butted by my horse which fractured brow bone and knocked me out. Horse slipped and fell on me tearing ligaments in knee. Have cut a fair slice from top of my finger with a 4 blade razor, digging in bag for it in gym. Wouldn’t stop bleeding because I’d been taking turmeric ( blood thinner) and low dose aspirin. Had to have it stitched . Broken 2 toes at school by dropping those blinking wooden boxes the children play with. Took skin off palms when I fell on a gravel drive. Had to have gravel tweezered out. That was most painful injury I’ve had.

[Ddot]

Ripping beans off a bamboo teepee, bamboo snapped and impaled my wrist. Numpty surgeon insisted nothing in there even though you get hold of the wood ( ooo err mrs) cleaned it out but not before he gave me a 3" scar. Then had to go back into surgery six weeks later to get the half inch piece of bloody wood out. 1" scar. Unfortunately now have dent (infection ate my wrist) and two scars so look like I tried to top myself

[nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut]

Ran myself over with an electric pallet truck. I stopped but didn't take my thumb off the switch and ran it into the back of my own legs and somersaulted over the top of it.

[Fireants]

I was standing at a festival in Texas and felt my leg BURN. To cool it down, I wiped my ice-lolly up and down my leg. Cue zillions of additional fire ants coming out of the nest at the smell of sugar. Bitten to death, they were all over me.

[AutistGoth]

Never iron your clothes in the nude. I did and gave myself a beautiful burn mark on the left hand side of my belly.

The worst thing is that two days later, I did the exact same thing again!

[Fireants]

The pain was excruciating. I wish I’d never reacted like that.

[Cushionsnotpillows]

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba I've only read the first part of the thread and over ten posts are yours - honestly, how are you still alive? It's a miracle!

[ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba]

[quote Cushionsnotpillows]@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba I've only read the first part of the thread and over ten posts are yours - honestly, how are you still alive? It's a miracle! [/quote]
@Cushionsnotpillows

🤣
to quote George of the jungle "George is lucky I guess!"

I almost died when I was 2 (some infection caused prolonged high fever that made me very ill) then I got another near brush with appendicitis that was almost perforated by the time I had the op when I was 10.
never broke a bone.

I read so many of these stories thinking "😱yeah, mine are not even close".

[bruffin]

Fallen over the garage step twice in a month

First time landed on my forehead, had a black eye and a tooth through my chin and bruised legs , just got over the black eye and did it again and landed on my fists, ended up with bruised knuckles and knees.

[CassandraCalled]

Please may I ask - how did you burn your face on an iron?! Ouch!

[BoredOfThisShit]

I always walk into door frames….
Like how 🤦🏻‍♀️

[Ddot]

Think I get my friends to read this thread, they think I need supervision. Compared to some on here I'm not as my name suggests dippy old tart🤪 extra d is a secret

[sussexman]

I just have trouble seeing things :(

When I was about 14 myself, Mum and my sister were going to Clarks for new shoes. Two of us walked happily through the open door. I walked into the closed one.

I have collided with those pesky invisible Post Boxes not once but twice.

I surprisingly frequently lean forward to inspect whatever I'm cooking on the hob and engage in an unexpected head/extractor hood interaction.

[Sweetpea1532]

@AlCalavicci
This thread, too!

[ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba]

@BoredOfThisShit

I always walk into door frames….
Like how 🤦🏻‍♀️

@BoredOfThisShit

only you and DS4!
he did that at school today (well yesterday). banged his hand, got a boxer's fracture in 3 fingers, elbow length cast & fingers tsped together, x-ray on Thu or Fri to see if he needs an op.

😱
you two need to cut this shit out!