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Original poster

Sleeping with the window open at night

77 replies

Icepops · 04/06/2021 08:12

Person A likes the window closed at night as doesn’t like the risk of bugs/spiders etc.

Person B finds it hard to sleep in the heat and having the window open all night helps.

How do you find a compromise? At the moment person A/B is sleeping in a separate room but neither can do this indefinitely as it means bunking in with a child.

How to find a compromise? Bug nets have been suggested but are apparently unsightly. Hmm

OP posts:
Chloemol · 04/06/2021 11:02

My window is open every night whatever the weather and I have never had a problem with bugs

Person A needs to get a grip

Kyph · 04/06/2021 11:03

I don't think spiders need an open window.
Person A is being unreasonable.

Deadringer · 04/06/2021 11:10

We can't have the window open due to noise, if that isn't an issue person A is unreasonable imo. My sil won't allow any window in her house to be opened, ever, because she is terrified of spiders. The house is unbearably stuffy at any time of the year, i avoid going there if possible.

Worriesome · 04/06/2021 11:13

Keep the window closed but a vent open and also put a fan in the bedroom?

AlmostSummer21 · 04/06/2021 11:17

@AllIknowsofar

Ex and I used to sleep in separate rooms in the summer as we could not find a compromise(not a bugs issue though.) I think if you really can’t agree, the person who likes the window closed wins.
Why?
Pantah630 · 04/06/2021 11:17

@squashyhat

Night flying insects are generally attracted to light. Open the window after all the lights are turned off.
^this
SunshineSum · 04/06/2021 11:29

Grey bug screens are practically invisible. I also hate flying insects and was always a bit reluctant to open windows due to this - I mean, I opened them but I wasn't particularly happy about it. Then I got bug screens and omg it's changed my quality of life, really. I got the magnetic ones that you literally take off in a second when you want to, I hardly notice them at all and I can have windows open whenever I want to. They are cheap as fuck too. So if that's all that's stopping person a (whose thinking I sympathise with, really) and it's not about temperature or noise, I'd urge them to get themselves on the jml website and order a few.

AlmostSummer21 · 04/06/2021 11:31

A has the option of a bug net, if they don't want to use one then tough luck.

I, as you probably guessed, sleep with the window open all year (bar a few nights -parties etc) the nights the window is closed i wake with a headache. Someone whinging about 'bugs' would get short shrift.

A few nights a year I do get bothered by a mass of tiny flying twats so I turn the light out, they soon disappear. If it bothered me that much I'd get an insect screen, I can't be arsed closing the window at bed time and opening it before I go to sleep. I don't sleep well anyway so at the point I might go to sleep I'm not getting out of bed!!

A needs to grow up and stop whining like a very small child about 'bugs' 🙄🙄

AlmostSummer21 · 04/06/2021 11:34

@Deadringer

We can't have the window open due to noise, if that isn't an issue person A is unreasonable imo. My sil won't allow any window in her house to be opened, ever, because she is terrified of spiders. The house is unbearably stuffy at any time of the year, i avoid going there if possible.
Like never???

She'd hate it here. Upstairs windows open pretty much 24/7/365 and downstairs open from getting up until bed most days of the year. Doors too. Mid winter not always the doors, & windows maybe half the day

I could bear such a stuffy house.

2bazookas · 04/06/2021 11:34

Tell the scaredy one, bugs won't have any reason to crawl/ fly in if there's no light to attract them.Don't turn on the bedroom lights when you get ready for bed. Last thing, open the window.

FWIW we sleep with the windows open all year round and never have bugs in the bedroom... and that's even when we've had the lights on .

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 04/06/2021 11:36

Bugs come in during the day too. You don't get any more of them at night than you do in the day.

TheOrigRights · 04/06/2021 11:40

@nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut

Bugs come in during the day too. You don't get any more of them at night than you do in the day.
Yes you do. Loads of bugs are more active at night.
LeonardLikesThisPost · 04/06/2021 11:40

I'm a huge fresh air / windows open fan in the winter, but like them closed at this time of year for this reason. I normally open them for half an hour or so when I am sitting in bed having coffee, so I can keep an eye on them and see if anything comes in.

The other day I thought I'd closed them but one was left open a crack and that night I had a spider running around in my bed 😭 so yes, being extra vigilant now.

The velcro sticky nets don't stick to my window frames for some reason.

SunshineSum · 04/06/2021 11:45

It depends where you are really. I live next to a railway and it's pretty waspy because ofc no one controls nests etc so I did used to get wasps in my room at night and on one memorable occasion a fuck off huge flying mutant beetle/cockroach/whatever that battered itself around the room. But with bug nets, bugs no more.

doadeer · 04/06/2021 12:12

I have window open almost all the time, never noticed any bugs! I love fresh air at night and would find it hard to sleep without the window open 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
Icepops · 04/06/2021 12:13

Thank you everyone, you’ve made me feel a lot better about wanting the window open. Like many others have said, I also like it open all year (I like to air the house in general) where as OH will go round closing windows which really annoys me.

I think I am going to get the bug nets anyway so OH can’t insist on closing the windows.

OP posts:
calamityjam · 04/06/2021 12:14

Always sleep with the window open and I've never had a bug problem

soreenqueen21 · 04/06/2021 12:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ElizabethTudor · 04/06/2021 12:23

I don’t think it’s fair to say bug-fear person should just get over it. Yes, it’s an irrational fear, but a fear all the same. However, they can’t then say they don’t want bug nets because they’re unsightly. That’s just daft.

So I’d get the bug nets, as that’s a good compromise.

bishbashbosh99 · 04/06/2021 12:26

Eek I won't let the window be open as I expect giant spiders to eat us in our sleep. So we have a tan

Sh05 · 04/06/2021 12:29

If bugnets are unsightly then make one of your own.
I use voile fabric ( in a colour of my choice) and use the stick on velcro strips to attach it to the windows. That way once the cold sets in I can remove it and it's easily removed to wash as well

rosesarered321 · 04/06/2021 12:31

Person A is being unreasonable as long as you turn the light off before you open the window you won't get bugs.

MikeWozniaksGloriousTache · 04/06/2021 12:40

If a permanent net is unslightly would a removable mesh screen be a compromise? Pop it on when the window is open, remove in the morning? Honestly though, who is it unsightly for? I couldn't tell you what kind of screening my neighbours have in their bedrooms without going to check, and it wouldn't stay embedded in my brain.

orangejuicer · 04/06/2021 12:41

You can get fixed screens which are a lot nicer than nets and allow the windows to stay open. Win-win.

No I haven't read the full thread.

MeanderingGently · 04/06/2021 12:44

I can't sleep without a window open, I also hate spiders! To anyone saying there isn't a problem, I can tell you that spiders most certainly do crawl in through the windows, quite regularly, especially if you live in the countryside like I do!

Bug net is the answer. I buy the very fine black type, it comes with thin sticky tape which you put round the window opening. You then cut the net to fit and stretch it across, it 'sticks' to the rough surface on the tape (difficult to describe).

The blck netting can't even be seen across the opening, although the tape round the edge can be, you can get the tape in black or white to blend in and it's only a cm width so not very obvious.

It's your only solution....