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Original poster

Need another reference for job, ideas?

53 replies

Referencemethis · 02/06/2021 12:28

Possibly wrong section please move if so.

I have a job and my current line manager will provide a reference but the job I’m applying for wants a character reference from an upstanding member of society.

I literally don’t know anyone. I’m not in touch with any of my old school teachers, DDs headteacher has a blanket ban on teachers providing references or signing passport photos etc. Doctors have said they’ll charge me each time someone asks them for a reference and I may need it again so only want to go down that route if I have to (been quoted £35 a time, which is a huge amount of money to me).

Any other ideas of who I can ask?

OP posts:
midsummabreak · 02/06/2021 14:42

Briefly email DDS nursery manager , you have nothing to lose and you could be in with a good chance.
The fact that teachers have a blanket ban on it and doctors are charging for it shows that the process needs to change as many others are in same boat as you.

emmathedilemma · 02/06/2021 14:45

I was the first in my family to go to university.
This could be your solution here. Do you have any coursemates or friends who've now got professional qualifications or course tutors / mentors who could do it?

HGC2 · 02/06/2021 14:49

Could you not get a second reference from someone at work? I'm Civil Service and have accepted references from the same place when recruiting, just ask the second to be less about your performance and more about your character

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MrsPnut · 02/06/2021 14:54

Is there no other parent at school you know? I'm an accountant and have counter signed passports and provided character references for friends and other PTA members.

Original poster
Referencemethis · 02/06/2021 14:56

@MrsPnut

Is there no other parent at school you know? I'm an accountant and have counter signed passports and provided character references for friends and other PTA members.
Only to say hello to, we're not allowed to stop and they go in based on surname so it's only others who have the same surname or nearby initials to DD that I see on the school run now. I wouldn't know their jobs.
OP posts:
Original poster
Referencemethis · 02/06/2021 14:57

@HGC2

Could you not get a second reference from someone at work? I'm Civil Service and have accepted references from the same place when recruiting, just ask the second to be less about your performance and more about your character
I'm not in the civil service right now, want to get into it. Current job is a basic admin role no qualifications bar GCSEs.

I will ask around my old course mates at University, hadn't thought of them.

OP posts:
SnowdaySewday · 02/06/2021 15:04

Do your parents have any friends or neighbours who have known you since you were young?

Someone you were at university with?

SnowdaySewday · 02/06/2021 15:04

Sorry cross post

tbtf · 02/06/2021 15:04

Does your current job have other departments? Often the accounts team with have an accountant, the legal team would have a solicitor. Is there another manager of a different team? Different location?

hoxt · 02/06/2021 15:10

What about one of your lecturers from uni?

Moltenpink · 02/06/2021 15:12

How about a priest? Pub landlord? (I’m not joking, I once had my local pub landlord witness a contract for me as he was on the list of trusted professions Smile)

kimlo · 02/06/2021 15:16

email the nursery manager. Eyps remember children fpr longer than you wpuld think and ypu are in no worse a position than if you didn't ask if she says no.

Whos the manager now? Did they wprk there when dd went?

ShinySquirrel · 02/06/2021 15:19

I was in the same position as you. My friend did the reference.

What jobs do your friends do? Can you tweak their job title to make it sound fancier? I'm thinking in the same way people do when getting car insurance, not outright lying.

musicinspring1 · 02/06/2021 15:21

I would ask old university friends. Also is the blanket ban at your DDs school just for the head teacher or any teacher ? I’m an ex teacher and if I knew a pupils parent was in genuine need of a reference like this I would do it (discreetly if needed !)
Any nursery worker at your DDs pre school who remembers you and your DD? There must be someone there still.
Are you on Facebook? A shout out to any friends on there ?
Neighbours ?
You sound very despondent and I don’t blame you but I feel you should definitely give it a good try - you sound like you need a bit of luck 💐 Hope all goes well.

musicinspring1 · 02/06/2021 15:22

Just thought - did you go to any toddler groups with DD when younger at a church? A church worker might remember you ?

Disfordarkchocolate · 02/06/2021 15:27

I once had to do this and it was a pain in the backside. I eventually found a colleague who signed for me, they happened to be a clinician.

Neighneigh · 02/06/2021 15:30

Do you have a class Facebook or WhatsApp group for your child? You could bob a quick message on there asking if anyone is on the list of professions. We've got dad's who are firemen, that kind of thing might come up?

TakeYourFinalPosition · 02/06/2021 15:34

You might not, but do you know anyone self-employed?

I'm a company director but I'd guess most of my friends wouldn't consider me to be on the list... they'd just think of me as self-employed, so I figured I'd ask just incase.

PiePieChickenPie · 02/06/2021 15:34

I was in a similar situation a few years ago and although I knew that the head said no references from any school staff I chanced it on the quiet - no other parents around and luckily the teacher was happy to do it for me as I was genuinely stuck otherwise. Never told any parents/school staff about it and got the job. Hope you get something sorted

UpHillandDownAle · 02/06/2021 15:41

Usually this means they want somebody who’s a member of a professional body - so they are both easily identifiable as legitimate and also have their own professional future dependent on writing a genuine accurate reference. If you don’t have anyone you can ask then it would have to be your GP I guess. Good luck getting it sorted.

Original poster
Referencemethis · 02/06/2021 15:47

I did toddler groups but none were run by the church, the church hall is more a community centre.

I might have found someone, a sort of friend of a friend owns her own business but not in the local area so I'd discounted her. I'll ask her.

OP posts:
NoIdontwanttoseeyourknob · 02/06/2021 15:47

You mentioned that you haven’t had much contact with the HA but that still might be a good option - they would be able to give a reference based on your being a good tenant who isn’t in arrears etc.

Please don’t give up on the job. There will be a solution somehow.

Original poster
Referencemethis · 02/06/2021 15:49

@NoIdontwanttoseeyourknob

You mentioned that you haven’t had much contact with the HA but that still might be a good option - they would be able to give a reference based on your being a good tenant who isn’t in arrears etc.

Please don’t give up on the job. There will be a solution somehow.

I'll send an email now and see what they say.
OP posts:
ThroughThickAndThin01 · 02/06/2021 15:53

Do you belong to any clubs or do any exercise classes? My running coach gave me a character reference.

3CCC · 02/06/2021 15:58

Do you know anyone in the armed forces