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Original poster

How old were your children when they started walking to school alone?

87 replies

OceanVibes · 01/06/2021 13:56

I have a 8 and 10 year old child who are both desperate to walk to school alone.
I received a form from the school about permission to release them and I didn't allow permission because I'm in two minds about whether or not I should allow them to.
The school is just under a 4 minute walk away from our home, I have left them home alone to go shopping and they are very sensible children.
We have spoken about stranger danger and I have reiterated that when they do walk alone they must walk together and come straight home.
I have anxiety and the thought of not knowing if they made it okay is filling me with dread but they are seeing their friends walk home and keep pestering me about trusting them.
I'd like to hear of others in this position and what you would do please.

OP posts:
LakeFlyPie · 01/06/2021 15:11

Our primary school allow it in Yrs 5+6 with signed parental permission. DS1 walked alone in year 6 and DS2 been doing it since year 5. It's less than 10 min walk with lollipop man to cross them over road near school and DH working from home so someone here to check they arrive back safely

CherryPippa · 01/06/2021 15:36

Our area only allows this from Yr6. Oldest DC went to a different primary and they were the same.

We only live a 6 minute walk away but DS has to cross two roads with crossings on the edges of a shopping centre and there have been instances where I was walking with him that we had a few near misses as parents (women not men) were racing to get to across so they didn’t have to stop or flew across them as we’d started to walk Angry. Mainly in the morning. On one of them, there are often lorries parked right next to it (recovery vehicles which the company refuses to move) so you have to step into the road to check nothing’s coming and a lot of cars don’t slow down. There have been numerous complaints to the council but it looks like they are waiting for an accident to happen before they put zigzags around it or humps in the road. So I walk DS halfway, past the that crossing and watch him cross the other one from a distance. He walks home on his own though.

His secondary school is a 40 minute walk away and I think he’ll be safer walking to/from there!

reluctantbrit · 01/06/2021 15:50

DD’s school only allowed it from Y6 but we let her go in alone (school is the end of a cul-de-sac earlier as nobody was really looking in the morning. Basically she went left to school and I went right to catch the train to work.

I also let her cross streets on her own to start getting independent.

We walked around 20 minutes but from one street corner onwards you had lots of children walking the same road so there was always plenty of others.

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roguetomato · 01/06/2021 15:50

Yr4.

Kezzie200 · 01/06/2021 16:02

Remember it's not stranger danger, which does happen but is rare.

It's also making sure they come straight home and watch for traffic etc and are safe to cross roads on their way home.

My son was 11 before we could trust him on our hill. He would be completely away with the fairies and ran the risk of not seeing people pulling out of all the little blind entrances we have here.

Kezzie200 · 01/06/2021 16:02

Not just stranger danger

SkodaKodiaq · 01/06/2021 18:52

I know I'm going to be flamed to kingdom come for this, but I genuinely don't think I will ever allow it 😬 I would have had a different opinion a few years ago, but round here at least (a fairly affluent, low-crime town actually), nearly every week we're hearing of attempted abductions.

Also, my child is only 6 so I'm not likely to be able to envisage that sort of thing yet! Plus I'm overprotective due to reasons from past events which I won't go into. Not sure if I'd think the same without those mitigating factors 🤷🏼‍♀️

SkodaKodiaq · 01/06/2021 18:55

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme

6 years old, but we live in Germany and the infrastructure is different! All children at mainstream walk either to school or to the bus stop and take the bus from the middle of their first week of school locally. There is no intrinsic reason they shouldn't IMO but it completely depends on the local infrastructure especially roads and crossings. Sadly so many people drive their children and oark dangerously around UK primary schools that they make it more dangerous for the other children to walk.
😵😵😵 That's neglect! Or do they not have predators in Germany?!?! Hmm
WhatWouldPhyllisCraneDo · 01/06/2021 19:06

Year 6 because their school didn't allow it before then.
School was literally around the corner. The only 'road' that had to be crossed has no traffic anyway. But that was the rule.
(It's now been changed so only the last term in year 6 is allowed which is a little OTT IMO)

DarcyLewis · 01/06/2021 19:11

8, short walk one quiet cul de sac to cross.

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 01/06/2021 19:11

SkodaKodiaq no, it isn't. Your assessment of risk isn't objective - you've just said you don't think you will ever let your child be independent. Failing to prepare your child for gradually increasing independence is neglect - failing to teach and allow independence is just keeping them alive but literally failing to bring them up and it's all about you - your anxiety and stress, your needs over those of the child.

DarcyLewis · 01/06/2021 19:12

@SkodaKodiaq

I know I'm going to be flamed to kingdom come for this, but I genuinely don't think I will ever allow it 😬 I would have had a different opinion a few years ago, but round here at least (a fairly affluent, low-crime town actually), nearly every week we're hearing of attempted abductions.

Also, my child is only 6 so I'm not likely to be able to envisage that sort of thing yet! Plus I'm overprotective due to reasons from past events which I won't go into. Not sure if I'd think the same without those mitigating factors 🤷🏼‍♀️

Those Facebook posts about “attempted child abductions” are 99% bullshit though. See also: men looking at houses and people driving slowly in white vans. Usually “foreign looking”.
MyDcAreMarvel · 01/06/2021 19:14

8

BonnyEm · 01/06/2021 19:21

I think it has more to do with the proximity and the roads than their ages. My 9 year old would be capable except we live just over a mile from school and have to cross very busy main roads.
A short walk through a quiet housing estate crossing quiet roads I'd have no issue with. Especially if there are 2 of them. They can look out for each other

RaraRachael · 01/06/2021 19:26

5 - kids here all walk to school - some on their own, some with friends. I always find the school run and school gate mums comments amusing as they're not really a thing here. devastated I missed out on all that fun Grin

scaredsadandstuck · 01/06/2021 19:29

From Yr 5 my DS walked part of the way home 'alone' (i.e. with about a dozen other kids from school) and I met him on route. Then from Yr6 we gradually built up to him walking all the way home - about 15 minutes walk with a couple of tricky crossings. I wasn't worried about abductions - there are loads of other kids and parents around at that time of day - I was worried about him getting hit by a car - still am to be honest and he's in yr 8, but total airhead!

PASStheCAKEandCHOC · 01/06/2021 19:30

9 when I dropped him en route to work so maybe 4 min walk.

10.5 and a 1 mile walk, all crossings were pelican crossings and a zebra crossing outside school.

crimsonlake · 01/06/2021 19:30

I walked with both of mine until they left primary school, I was mostly a sahm, the walk was around 25 mins and I actually enjoyed that time. I do not recall them ever asking to walk alone.

Emmelina · 01/06/2021 19:30

Year 6, but met them on route and increased the distance they were alone bit by bit to make sure they could do each part sensibly.
So for a few days I’d meet them across the first road from the school, then on the corner of the next road etc etc.

AlohaMolly · 01/06/2021 19:34

Our village school allows it from year 3/7 years old. It’s a 0.8 mile walk from here to school (I know through logging it on my garmin!) and all the children seem to walk in just fine. I’m pretty sure I’ll be happy to let DS do it from then, as he passes several of his friends houses en route, so plenty of people to watch out for each other’s children!

Dustyhedge · 01/06/2021 19:49

My 4yo is desperate to walk home on her own. Obviously the answer is no but she’d be quite capable of it as our route involves no road crossings. I’m not sure when I’d let her tbh. I think the school allows it from last term of year 5 but at that point I’d also have her younger sister to think about so not really sure if it will actually happen.

superduster · 01/06/2021 20:00

Not until secondary. Its a 20 mins walk but one road that needs to be crossed is very busy. If we still had a crossing patroller on that road I would let him walk now (10 - end of Year 5).

Kapalika · 01/06/2021 20:05

Yr 5, did a bit of half way walking for a month or so. 1 mile walk with a busy road and railway crossing.

4PawsGood · 01/06/2021 20:08

@SkodaKodiaq

I know I'm going to be flamed to kingdom come for this, but I genuinely don't think I will ever allow it 😬 I would have had a different opinion a few years ago, but round here at least (a fairly affluent, low-crime town actually), nearly every week we're hearing of attempted abductions.

Also, my child is only 6 so I'm not likely to be able to envisage that sort of thing yet! Plus I'm overprotective due to reasons from past events which I won't go into. Not sure if I'd think the same without those mitigating factors 🤷🏼‍♀️

Are they real abduction attempts or is it scaremongering? That sounds surprising.
IEat · 01/06/2021 20:27

Your kids may be sensible other people aren’t! Easter Year 6 for me and not before but that’s just me