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Original poster

Today I got to be the mum I always wanted to be

76 replies

Mylittlesandwich · 30/05/2021 14:52

Warning this will probably sound boastful and self-centred.

I always imagined myself as a specific type of mum. The reality was very different. I struggled to breastfeed and had terrible PND. Every day was survival mode. I didn't get to really start enjoying motherhood until DS turned 1. He's 18 months now.

Today however we went out for a mooch around the shops. I popped on my new (second hand) toddler back carrier which DS seemed to quite like. We stopped and had sushi which DS loves. I then popped him back into his carrier and he was so comfy he fell asleep. I caught sight of myself in a shop mirror and I just looked so happy and content. Like how I imagined I would feel. A couple of people commented that DS looked very comfy and the whole experience has just made me feel great.

Did anyone else have a moment when everything just seemed to click for them?

OP posts:
SunnyMustard · 31/05/2021 08:45

So happy for you :) For getting through this time and being able to reap the benefits of your hard work. I am just 11 weeks into parenthood and this new role gives me very mixed feelings. It is not easy with all of our unreasonable expectations on ourselves. You deserve this moment and I wish you many more to follow.

MrsAudreyAlfredRobertsOBEHmm · 31/05/2021 08:49

What a lovely post

ThePartyIs · 31/05/2021 08:53

I’m so happy for you op! It’s a lovely feeling and sometimes they come so few and far between Flowers
A family member has set up an email address for their newborn, they send photos and memories to it and the plan is to give him the password when he turns 21, I really wish I’d done something like this ! I suppose it could be done on paper but I probably would have lost the book at some stage over the years Grin

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Temp023 · 31/05/2021 08:55

I look at my 17yo sometimes when she is chatting to my friends so confidently, or driving her car so competently or just dancing away in the kitchen and I think;“Gosh, I did that!”

Mind you, sometimes I look at the state of her bedroom, or listen to her backchatting her Dad and I think;
“This must be my fault!”

TheChosenTwo · 31/05/2021 09:13

What a lovely post OP Flowers
I’ve enjoyed all the stages with my dc to be honest, but that’s not to say it hasn’t been incredibly tough at times.
I remember the first day with 13 month old dd and newborn dd2, I cried and cried after dh had gone to work, feeling totally overwhelmed at the idea of looking after a toddler who was into absolutely everything and a 3 day old baby who just wanted to be cuddled all the time.
MIL told me to put the baby in a sling and stick dd1 in her pushchair and get out for a little walk. We ended up at the park and this kind of calm washed over me. I realised it was doable, that I was able to manage it and it would all be okay.
It’s still so vivid to me 16 years on.
Your post isn’t boastful at all! Being a parent is bloody hard!

sashh · 31/05/2021 09:53

Ow what a happy day op. Print your post out and keep it.

Myphone · 31/05/2021 09:57

That sounds like a brilliant day. Wishing you lots more.

jelly79 · 31/05/2021 10:06

Yes to this post! It's amazing to celebrate the wins and really enjoy these days!

My DS4 has just come through a really difficult phase of anger rages and hitting / whinging / not going to bed. We have just been away for a weekend and he was adorable. I can't get enough of him!

Enjoy mama x

EishetChayil · 31/05/2021 10:08

This is so nice to read! Glad you had that moment.

I felt sort of similar the other day, driving home from visiting a friend, with baby DD in her new car seat. She's a lockdown baby so we haven't really been out and about much. For once I actually FELT like a mum out with her baby!

AlessandroVasectomi · 31/05/2021 10:13

As a proud new-ish grandpa, I congratulate you. I enjoy watching mums with their babies, seeing that special bond between them. Our daughter-in-law has got motherhood sorted after 9 months and she is so happy - it makes everybody happy. If I’d seen you out with your DS I’d have been happy for you too. Here’s to many more proud moments among all the inevitable anxious ones

TenThousandSpoons · 31/05/2021 10:16

Ah what a lovely post. It’s made me well up! I hope you have many more of those wonderful days where everything goes just right. Flowers

CigarsofthePharoahs · 31/05/2021 10:16

When my eldest was three and my youngest four months. Eldest was getting over chicken pox, youngest was in the midst of it. It had been a hellish two weeks.
Baby fell asleep in my arms, my three year old climbed up on the sofa next to me, cuddled up and dozed off too.
It's one of those moments I want to dip in gold and preserve forever. My two sleeping children, the snuggles. I just sat there for a couple of hours lost in the wonder of them.

gelatodipistacchio · 31/05/2021 10:32

That's wonderful, OP!

After spending the first year of my DD's life utterly terrified (while enjoying the sweet moments), I started to enjoy our time a bit more and I've even worried about her getting bigger and less adorable. However, I took her to a special hotel and theme park yesterday, and at one point I suddenly realised that she was a pleasure. Not that she wasn't before, but at almost 5 years old she needs less help with everything and is more... reasonable? It's easier just to have fun.

May you experience the same - that parenting gets better and better Smile

Parsley1234 · 31/05/2021 10:36

Beautiful enjoy those moments they are so precious x

WWYD12345 · 31/05/2021 10:36

This is so lovely OP. There are so many ways as a mum where you end up thinking oh my goodness what a shambles today has been! Relish it, sounds like a lovely day and the first of many hopefully ❤️

imisscashmere · 31/05/2021 11:19

I loved reading this and I’m so happy for you OP!

I’ve been through similar myself, DS is 16 months now. The other day he was happily playing with a saucepan full of water in the garden, and I was enjoying some weeding in the sun - I felt a rush of joy and contentment and just thought - finally! I’m so happy, and I’m actually enjoying myself Smile

MinorCharacter · 31/05/2021 11:26

That's a lovely post, OP. I wasn't good at the newborn stage at all, and those moments of 'I can do this, this is OK' came later on for me, too.

LemonDrizzles · 31/05/2021 18:07

Very happy for you, OP! Life can be full of lovely moments like this :)

All the best

Original poster
Mylittlesandwich · 31/05/2021 22:12

We had another lovely day today. With DH this time. I think I'm just starting to realise that I actually am his mum if that makes sense? I'm not looking after him until someone more capable can step in. I'm it and I'm good enough.

OP posts:
Mogloveseggs · 31/05/2021 22:15

❤️

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 31/05/2021 22:16

@Mylittlesandwich

We had another lovely day today. With DH this time. I think I'm just starting to realise that I actually am his mum if that makes sense? I'm not looking after him until someone more capable can step in. I'm it and I'm good enough.
@Mylittlesandwich

awww! yup, it's you and you are definitely good enough.
happy for you

Cheeseycheeseycheesecheese · 31/05/2021 22:25

Oh this is lovely to read!! Nothing boastful in living the reality you imagined!

NoMontaguesOrCapulets · 31/05/2021 22:32

What lovely posts OP. You are definitely good enough! Enjoy lots of moments like these! Smile

Mrsmophead · 31/05/2021 22:37

Absolutely lovely to read this. I bet he was just delighted with himself too.

Changechangychange · 31/05/2021 23:03

I have to say, now DS4 is old enough to talk to me, we have so much fun on trips out. DH doesn’t generally come, so we spend all day together at the zoo or wherever, and it is just lovely to be the two of us all day. He really is my favourite person.

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