Thinking of starting a playgroup for knackered mums/parents/carers - would this work do you think?

[inthekitchensink]

I’m in the early stages of researching setting up a playgroup for preschoolers at the local hall, where adults can come and get shit done on their phones, or read or whatever with tea/coffee/biscuits - while I play with the children.

All the playgroups I went to with my toddler encouraged parental interaction and really all I wanted was somewhere I could get admin done for an hour or read mumsnet while my child had quality play & learning.

I’m a montessori practitioner with a few spare hours a week and really miss working with kids, but don’t want to do it full time. I would provide montessori materials to play with, arts and crafts, story time.

Would you be interested in something like this or am I just projecting? !

It is nearly always fully booked

As a suggestion, I’d personally love weekend childcare where I can leave the kids and go home to sleep!! I’d pay whatever it cost! 🤣

Will the children be following a curriculum ? Do you have appropriately qualified staff? Are you appropriately qualified? Are you and all your staff enhanced DBS cleared? What curriculum will the children be following while parents working? What food provisions have you in place? Are your kitchens approved? What food will you be providing? Are your food technicians qualified and insured? Have your kitchens and food prep been inspected and signed off.

I can't be the only parent who wishes we could opt out of all this on occasion.

Emphasis on occasion.

Yes I understand why it's all in place. But really sometimes I just wanted to put my child somewhere and be confident another child isn't going to kill them.

I went on a big extended family holiday to spain once as the only parent, and I was single at the time. All fam pitched in a bit during the day but at night they obviously wanted to drink and not be responsible for my kids.

I bowed out one night and found a softplay for the girls, fully expecting the UK version where you're supposed to supervise but the odd few do not, so if you give a single fuck about your children you need eyes on them at all times even if you're not up there climbing with them. My youngest was only 1 so I expected to be in there with her.

Well. I paid, and then a lovely lady came and took the youngest out of my arms and led them into the softplay. I had a little wtf moment and reception loosely explained that they were supervising play, I couldn't leave the room but I wasn't expected to be in with them or watching them. Then she pointed me in the direction of the tapas bar.

I sat there with a glass of rose and some amazing spanish food reading a book. It was the best night of the entire holiday.

And to clarify - nobody was getting rat arsed. Mostly couples enjoying food with the odd single parent like me and one or two small friendship groups. I soooo wished we had something like that in the UK, so OP if the best we can do here is coffee, cake, mumsnet, and your word that my child won't be killed then I'd take what you can give me

@mercuree

Will the children be following a curriculum ? Do you have appropriately qualified staff? Are you appropriately qualified? Are you and all your staff enhanced DBS cleared? What curriculum will the children be following while parents working? What food provisions have you in place? Are your kitchens approved? What food will you be providing? Are your food technicians qualified and insured? Have your kitchens and food prep been inspected and signed off.

I can't be the only parent who wishes we could opt out of all this on occasion.

Emphasis on occasion.

Yes I understand why it's all in place. But really sometimes I just wanted to put my child somewhere and be confident another child isn't going to kill them.

I went on a big extended family holiday to spain once as the only parent, and I was single at the time. All fam pitched in a bit during the day but at night they obviously wanted to drink and not be responsible for my kids.

I bowed out one night and found a softplay for the girls, fully expecting the UK version where you're supposed to supervise but the odd few do not, so if you give a single fuck about your children you need eyes on them at all times even if you're not up there climbing with them. My youngest was only 1 so I expected to be in there with her.

Well. I paid, and then a lovely lady came and took the youngest out of my arms and led them into the softplay. I had a little wtf moment and reception loosely explained that they were supervising play, I couldn't leave the room but I wasn't expected to be in with them or watching them. Then she pointed me in the direction of the tapas bar.

I sat there with a glass of rose and some amazing spanish food reading a book. It was the best night of the entire holiday.

And to clarify - nobody was getting rat arsed. Mostly couples enjoying food with the odd single parent like me and one or two small friendship groups. I soooo wished we had something like that in the UK, so OP if the best we can do here is coffee, cake, mumsnet, and your word that my child won't be killed then I'd take what you can give me

Good God this sounds heavenly. If I ever have room for a tapas bar I’m doing this!

So are you thinking of running it as a social enterprise, rather than a profit making business?

I remember going to toddler group with my older brother before we were old enough for nursery (I have lots of very early memories!), my mum used to just dump us in the room with the other toddlers while she enjoyed tea and biscuits and chilled out, which I think was the norm back then (parents generally not involved/hands on in these types of groups). Fwiw I absolutely loved it and really thrived there, only have positive memories of this. There was one time my mum had to get involved though because I decided to climb up a chair to play with the light switch.

My daughter is only 4 months old, but I would go to the kind of set up you're describing when she's old enough. I would take my laptop and do bits of uni work while knowing she is happy and being entertained and not having to faff with childcare.

There are some play cafes in Edinburgh that do this. Its amazing, I wish I had a local one. The montessori training is your big sell here. Guilt free as its all educational and good for independence skills innit 👏

Do it!!!

Think this is an excellent idea. I really wouldn’t expect you to follow a curriculum or provide food for the children, it would be clear this wasn’t full childcare.

When I went to ‘stay and play’ I really didn’t want to play! I wanted to talk to other adults while my child played or else just read/sit in peace for 15 minutes. If coffee and cake was available that would be an added reason for going.

I'm not sure how this is any different from stay and plays / toddler groups in Church halls up and down the country ?

The volunteers from the Church put on some craft and play with the dc. Some carers play, some sit and chat. Isn't that the point of a toddler group - to give parents chance to chat to another adult ?

I think a lot of us have experience of the kind of toddler groups where you’re constantly reminded to actively play with your child, and join in group singing and all that crap. Nowhere to sit for grown ups (and my word I needed proper chairs for a long time, getting up and down off the floor with postpartum injuries was not fun), no hot drinks, expected to be right by your kids at all times.

The OP is talking about deliberately setting it up so the parents get a break while the kids play with each other, supervised by the staff. Sounds great to me.

Somewhere I used to live ran similar in a private room off a cafe - I would just tell the staff if I was getting a coffee/nipping to the loo, otherwise I’d be sat at one end working/chatting/staring peacefully into space. If DC got upset/needed a change etc I was right there, but mostly they just played and ignored me, especially when we were going regularly.

I think it’s a good idea but all in the marketing and then actual set-up.

I went to a couple of stay n plays with dd that were like this (along with lots that weren’t!). The differences were partly subtle - lots of chairs and a free coffee station for adults - partly things like lots of toys/areas, all clearly floor level and visible, with plenty of self-directed things for DC to do. So there was no “You don’t have to interact with your kid here” but the setup facilitated independent play.

@bookishtartlet

There are some play cafes in Edinburgh that do this. Its amazing, I wish I had a local one. The montessori training is your big sell here. Guilt free as its all educational and good for independence skills innit 👏

Do it!!!

what and where are they? Desperate!

You sound great OP!

@girl71 the parents would be staying in the same room and they would only be there for an hour or so, like a playgroup. They wouldn't need keyworkers and a curriculum - its not a nursery.

There was a play cafe near us which did this. They had a fairly small industrial unit, one half was done out like a role play area for kids, with a play kitchen, dressing up are, books that sort of thing. The other half was done up like an adult cafe with sofas and tables and a cafe serving drinks. There was a sort of low wall made of soft bricks in between so kids could go over to their parents by climbing/lifted over it, but it sort of discouraged them from constantly going back and forth. And then the staff would interact with the kids and keep them busy, while the parents could sit and chat. Legally, the parents were still responsible for supervising their child - it was all one room, the staff weren't providing food or any personal care, literally just playing dress up with the kids or reading them books.

I'm not sure how it would work if it was only a few hours per week as you wouldn't be able to have this set up, but there would be ways around it.

Agree with this. I was gutted when they closed down our local parent and child playgroup like this. Loads of toys thrown into the hall, a few sensory or crafty type activities, unlimited tea and coffee, biscuits, no pressure. Mostly mums just stayed around and chatted whilst the kids went wild.

I like the idea in principle, but fern Dad was toddler/preschool age, if I was in the room she’d ignore all attempts from other adults trying to entertain her, and just sit on/cling to/badger me.

Maybe this is just me, but I'm not sure I "get" this. For a start all 3 years in the UK have free nursery hours, so we are talking about 1 and 2 year olds ? When I had DCs this age If I had admin that I needed to do I'd take them swimming first then set them up with some food in a buggy, IME they'd often fall asleep. It seems to me you are going to have some parents wanting to concentrate/work/ whatever and some wanting to chat, and the noise.......fine for mumsnetting less good for work emails. Childcare is childcare, why not volunteer in a childcare setting if that's what floats your boat. But plenty on here seem to think it will work.

Sounds great - can I bring my pre-teen!

this sounds brilliant

Would definitely come and just relax, chat to other mums. Have a coffee etc

@Tiffanny

this sounds brilliant

Would definitely come and just relax, chat to other mums. Have a coffee etc

But they’d all be on their phones / laptops? It sounds horrific to be honest.

Sounds dreamy! Please actually call it/brand it Stay And Don’t Play, or The Mums’ Antisocial

Make sure there's a good 4g or WiFi that people can use!

I feel so so lucky that playgroups i encountered were of the toys/child melee /coffee and chat variety. That, surely, was the entire point. We had one great one where there was an actual paid play person through some kind of funding and like u describe she didn’t insist on parents being part of the activity.
I love your idea OP. Like taking the kids to granny’s and relaxing while she does all the worthy fun messy activities with them.

This just sounds like the Stay and Play groups I used to go to.