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Original poster

Driving lesson nightmare

55 replies

Findingahappyplace · 26/05/2021 10:44

I had the worst driving lesson ever yesterday.
It was an absolute nightmare from beginning to end. 10 minutes into a 2 hour lesson and I wanted to cry and go home 🙁
I’m trying so hard but I don’t think I’m a natural driver at all. My instructor spent most of the lesson shouting at me and it’s really knocked my confidence - and I wasn’t particularly confident to start with.
I came home and just burst into tears and then spent the rest of the day just crying whenever I thought about that lesson.
I don’t know if I will ever be able to drive, and I don’t know if I’m just wasting my time 😭
I don’t even know why I’m posting. I don’t know if I want advice or reassurance, or what, but I just feel really down today and can’t seem to pick myself back up from it.

OP posts:

Youaremysunshine09 · 26/05/2021 10:46

I felt like this several times in my driving lessons, I was crying on nearly every lesson, my instructor was harsh, I wanted to give up so many times, but I didn't and I passed first time. Try getting a rescue remedy spray and using it every day, also on the morning of my test I took 2 paracetamol to calm my nerves. On the lesson directly before my test I burst into tears, I made so many mistakes and was certain I was failing, but I didn't. Stick with it. You can do it

Tulips2019 · 26/05/2021 10:47

This happened to me and it horrible. I used to dread it every week, then end up crying as it was so stressful. I tried changing instructor, and whilst that didn’t work for me sadly, but could you give that a go?

LadyDanburysHat · 26/05/2021 10:48

Get a different instructor. They should not be shouting at you. That is incredibly unhelpful.

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Blueberry40 · 26/05/2021 10:48

Any decent driving instructor should be building your confidence not shouting at you!! Don’t lose heart about it, lots of people pass their test who aren’t ‘natural’ drivers- you can do this. Can you find an instructor who specialises in nervous learners? It took me at least 3 instructors before I found the right one.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 26/05/2021 10:49

Look for a different instructor.
My first was nice, but didn't seem to understand nervous drivers
My second was just useless
The third... He got my issues and helped me overcome them.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 26/05/2021 10:49

@LadyDanburysHat

Get a different instructor. They should not be shouting at you. That is incredibly unhelpful.

Totally this! Yes you can do it OP, that’s what lessons are for, to learn!

rbe78 · 26/05/2021 10:50

Get a new instructor.

Pomtastic · 26/05/2021 10:50

The instructor shouldn't be constantly shouting at you he should be calmly building your confidence and skills up in quiet areas first! They sound utterly awful - definitely change instructor.

FadedRed · 26/05/2021 10:51

Get a different instructor. No good instructor would shout at you, especially at your second only lesson. Ask your friends/neighbours/workmates for recommendations for a decent instructor and don’t give up because of this person’s inability to do their job properly.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 26/05/2021 10:52

Change instructors. My first instructor was like that, made me an anxious wreck. I switched to a much calmer woman who had a good sense of humour and a shocking sense of direction. We spent a great deal of our lessons lost or following a satnav to get unlost, which had the result of turning me into the most chilled out driver ever. Where are we? Dunno, don't worry about it, we'll recognise something eventually.

Don't stay with someone who makes you feel shit when you screw up. Everyone does. I wasn't a natural driver so I switched to automatic then did my manual test a year after passing in an auto. It was nerves that was letting me down, I tended to panic if I made a mistake.

Palavah · 26/05/2021 10:52

@LadyDanburysHat

Get a different instructor. They should not be shouting at you. That is incredibly unhelpful.

This.

palmtreeday · 26/05/2021 10:56

Your driving instructor should not be shouting at you, I had a really lovely female instructor and even I had lessons where I thought I would never make it! I consider myself an intelligent person but I found it so so hard and it didn't come naturally to me at all. BUT I got through it and passed my test and I'm so happy that I can drive now, it opens up so many options for you. Please don't get disheartened.

Acupofcamus · 26/05/2021 10:56

Sounds like a shit instructor. You need someone who is supportive, this one absolutely isn’t. Find a new instructor.

iknowimcoming · 26/05/2021 10:57

Definitely change instructor and only do 1 hour lessons to start with, 2 hours is too long!

WeAllHaveWings · 26/05/2021 11:03

Get a new instructor. You might be the worst driver in the world, but you are their customer and should be treated with respect. No instructor should be shouting at a pupil until they cry. This is not your fault.

You can report an instructor for shouting at you here.

www.gov.uk/complain-about-a-driving-instructor

WeAllHaveWings · 26/05/2021 11:05

www.gov.uk/find-driving-schools-and-lessons

find new instructors here

Grizalda · 26/05/2021 11:08

My driving instructor was a bellend too!

I absolutely assure you - he will be 80% of the problem. You change to someone you click with and it makes all the difference. I promise!

Good luck!

Shadedog · 26/05/2021 11:12

Obviously get a different instructor. It’s easy to underestimate how difficult driving is because so many people do it. You sit in the passenger seat and chat to to driver as they change gears and navigate roundabouts without thinking. All these people started off stalling and not being able to change gear and stopping 3 metres short of where they meant. I remember ds1 being really downhearted after his first lesson, wanting to quit, saying he was never going to get it. I would say he was about 6-8 lessons in when he stopped saying it was scary and started to enjoy it. You will get there too.

TheatricalGiraffe · 26/05/2021 11:14

Change instructor. Honestly it's worth it,

My first instructor was horrible. He had no patience and after 10 hours I was still on quiet roads doing empty roundabouts.

I changed and within three lessons with the new one I was on duel carriageways, learning maneuvers and feeling so much better. I passed first time with him.

A good instructor will be patient and calm and helpful and should never ever shout at you.

ZombeaArthur · 26/05/2021 11:15

Pretty much everyone I know who struggled to learn to drive found learning significantly easier when they switched to a better instructor. I firmly believe that the reason my Mum never passed her test was due to her appalling instructor and the people I know who passed first time had a good working relationship with their instructor.

butterfly990 · 26/05/2021 11:16

Near where I live there is an old airfield that they rent out for £5 for a session. It might help your confidence if you go with a friend somewhere where there is no traffic, hills, obstacles to get you confident with handling the car.

Big hugs x

Findingahappyplace · 26/05/2021 11:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hoppinggreen · 26/05/2021 11:22

She might be a great instructor and a nice person but if you don’t suit eachother you need to find a new one. It’s not a reflection on either of you, it might just be a mismatch

BrownEyedGirl80 · 26/05/2021 11:24

What a cunt he is.No excuse for shouting what so ever.Id definitely change instructors,mine is fab.

Original poster

Findingahappyplace · 26/05/2021 11:24

@iknowimcoming

Definitely change instructor and only do 1 hour lessons to start with, 2 hours is too long!

Yes I do struggle with the 2 hour lessons. I had hoped it might help me to pass quicker, but I usually just end up really tired and I can’t concentrate or take in any more information towards the end. I usually end up making stupid mistakes towards the end of the lesson. (Although yesterday’s lesson was shit from beginning to end).

OP posts:

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