"You've lost weight" irritating.

[sadperson16]

Why do other women feel the need to comment and how am I supposed to respond.
I have lost a couple of pounds, so what?

I love it! I worked really hard since January and have lost 12kgs

I’d be pissed if no one mentioned my weight loss. It’s hard work at the gym, a “well done”
Now and again wouldn’t go amiss!

@Divebar2021

I’ve lost 2stone and am irritated that the majority of my colleagues at work have not mentioned it. WTF. I’ve worked bloody hard and yes I was fat before. My hairdresser who hasn’t seen me for 6 months has just said I look really good so I’m happy. I don’t find your OP logical at all I’m afraid.

You see your colleagues every day, it’s a gradual change they get used to. You haven’t seen your hairdresser in ages - it’s a noticeable difference to them.

Saying “Wow, you look great” is different to “Wow, have you lost weight?”

Commenting on weight without the person mentioning it themselves is rude.

I’ve lost 3 stone during lockdown. I’m dreading going back to work and the comments. I find once your weight is commented on people start to feel they can critique everything you eat and start monitoring your progress and it’s back handed comments I hate. “You look SO much better, you were very big”. I’m hoping no one notices…

I've worked damn hard to lose weight, and I will continue to do so. (Another 5.5 stone until I'm classed as a "healthy weight"). I'm thrilled when people notice.

" You've lost weight" or the slighty accusatory " Have you lost weight?"

I don't like it. I have low body conifence due to my toxic mother and post meno pause gained weight. It goes up a bit in winter and I may lose a little in summer. So what,thats my business. I am not a bloody heifer being sized up to sell.

@thefourgp

I hate it too and I never comment on someone else’s weight. It’s not a compliment - it’s an observation. A lot of people are self conscious about their bodies. I think it’s better to say ‘you look lovely today’ not ‘ooh, you’ve lost weight’.

This.

If someone tells me they have been getting fit / on a diet I will say “good for you, you are looking great on it” but not comment spontaneously solely on weight.

If someone has been giving a running commentary for weeks about their diet, I will say ‘well done, it’s working , I can see you have lost weight’.

I’d love this but then I’ve lost 10lbs recently and no one seems to have noticed.

On the flip side I hate “oh don’t you look well”

I know what you mean! I've lost 3stone in the last year and a half.

I've been this weight before, in fact I've been lighter but because I've been done yoga and running rather than weights & horse riding my shape has totally changed and I'm a lot slimmer than I previously have been.

Some of the people at work have made me feel really uncomfortable with all of their comments.

I hate this too, I would only say it if someone mentioned to me that they had been dieting or on a fitness kick. My mum however complained to me recently that I never comment on her weight loss. She's been losing and regaining my whole life so I just ignore it really.

we get the odd thread on here:

"I've lost so much weight but no one has commented to compliment me!"

I love it too! The Sainsburys delivery driver noticed I'd lost weight last week and I was chuffed!

Yeah. I was particularly irritated when serious illness caused my weight loss, and when I told people that, they were still saying ‘Oh, lucky you! You look great!’

I mean, you may think a cancer diagnosis is a minor thing compared to weight loss, but don’t assume I share your idiocy.

My hairdresser has lost a lot of weight through lockdown...through cancer treatment.

Commenting on someone else’s weight loss/gain/suspected pregnancy is really risky.

One friend keeps telling me I have got too thin. I haven't. I have just lost enough weight that it is noticeable. I was exasperated when she said it again so I said it is just because I was so big before. She said yes.

Thin and fat shaming in one minute.

Just don't mention weight fgs.

I hate it. My weight has always fluctuated. If someone says I've lost weight the unspoken comment is that they've noticed that I looked overweight the last time they saw me. When I put weight on I then feel very awkward that they will be judging me again. If I look great , tell me, but don't comment on my weight which has been a mental struggle my whole life. I would only comment on weight loss if I knew that a friend had previously confided in me that they wanted to or were losing weight.

@lljkk

we get the odd thread on here:

"I've lost so much weight but no one has commented to compliment me!"

Exactly...followed by "They're just jealous hun"

I don't comment on anyone's weight because so many people seem really touchy about it.

So in the past, some people have been offended that they've lost weight and I didn't mention it

A bitter pill to swallow, but true nevertheless; most people look better when they're not fat.

Does that really make the comments helpful though? Most diets fail, or they work at first but the weight goes back on. Not only do you then feel a failure, you know it's obvious to everyone who complimented you before, and that is embarrassing.

The only times I’ve lost significant weight it’s been unintentional (breastfeeding) and I actually prefer being at my normal weight. I mean it’s nice to have a flat stomach but I didn’t like what it did to my face or arms, or seeing my ribs under my collarbone in low cut tops. So when people commented approvingly it made me feel a bit uncomfortable.

@SunshineCake

One friend keeps telling me I have got too thin. I haven't. I have just lost enough weight that it is noticeable. I was exasperated when she said it again so I said it is just because I was so big before. She said yes.

Thin and fat shaming in one minute.

Just don't mention weight fgs.

Agreeing with you that you were so big before, is not 'fat shaming'

I don't like it either tbh. Especially when it's followed up with "you must feel so much better now"

@PegasusReturns

I’m afraid I love it.

It’s hard work losing weight and I’m delighted when I’ve lost a few pounds. I already know I wasn’t looking my best a few pounds over weight so I don’t take it as a criticism.

I feel the same. When I was two stone overweight comments like this kept me going until my goal weight :)

I've had people ask me if I've lost weight a number of times when I haven't actually lost any. Clearly they just imagine me fatter than I am when they actually see me

I think it’s ok if people who know you’re actively trying to lose weight comment.

I think it's just a conversation filler? I have lost weight on purpose and I like the comments!