Daft apath and other sayings

[WhoNeedsaManOfTheWorld]

This was used when I was a child as a fond insult I guess
Along with don't stand around like cheese at 4 pence
Unless my spelling is wrong apath doesn't fit does it?

Sitting around like Piffy on a rock bun.

"Seen yer face in t'butcher's window with an apple in t'gob"

My dad used to say we were naughty as ninepence (a ninepence would be a fake or bad coin) it was said as an affectionate saying for a mischevious child, not mean.

@iklboo

Sitting around like Piffy on a rock bun.

I have never come across anyone else who knows this saying - people look at me as if I’ve lost my last marble when I say it!

One Scottish saying I like is “His hat’s on a shoogly (shaky) peg” - meaning he is in a precarious position (probably job-related).

My mum's classic - "they haven't got two pennies to scratch their arse with". No idea why you'd be scratching your arse with a penny

For years I always thought it was spelt "aputh" and never knew it derived from halfpenny worth

Growing up in the 90s. if you asked your parents what was for dinner they'd say "shit wi sugar on!" My friends parents said it too

This was in Leicester, don't know if was said elsewhere

I've heard that one @shetlandponies 😂 My parents used to say 'If it pie. If we've got it, you can eat it!'

DH's grandad used to say 'She had a face like tripe' to described someone a bit haggard 😂

My great Nan called everyone Duck. I can still hear her saying it.

I love the fart in a phone box

Hahaha just remembered another one

"Face like a smacked arse" meaning someone looks miserable

And "oh go and Take your face for a shit" 😆 (meaning take that miserable look off your face / somewhere else)

My lovely gran used to call us all daft a'pethes (or however it should be spelt) I always think of her when people use the expression. I say it to my DC.

@Alwaysablockednose I'm enormously fond of wazzock too! Much under rated and under used!

Hold on to your ha'penny if my mother thought there was any risk of me even talking to a boy

When I asked my dad what I was getting for Christmas/birthday he would say

'That what tha blows dahn a trumpet'

The answer is note - a music note - as in nowt/nothing.

If someone was stood about doing nothing whilst others were busy, he would say

'Don't stand there like a tin of milk!'

If we weren't paying attention he would say

'Shape thi sen'

As in get yourself together.

There was also something about
'A tall hat wi 'andles (handles) on so I can carry mi sen out.' Can't remember context.

“Is it ummer!”

Meaning “is it heck as like” or “I don’t agree with what you’ve just said”

I miss my Dad

I really like ' nowt as queer as folk ' Don't know where about in England it comes from , but this will go through my mind often when I read MN .

@plinkplinkfizzer

I really like ' nowt as queer as folk ' Don't know where about in England it comes from , but this will go through my mind often when I read MN .

Yorkshire.

Somebody or something dodgy being described as being "as bent as a nine bob note"

Dark / cloudy skies being "as black as your grandfather's hat" or "looking black over Bill's mother's"

"Well I'll go to the foot of our stairs" as an expression of surprise about an unexpected announcement

Someone with bow legs being described as not being able to stop a pig in a passage

One of DMs was 'as daft as Dicks hatband'.

My Gran used to say 'did ye, aye' to indicate that she did not believe what you had just told her. And 'do ye think I come up the Clyde on a bike?'.

My Nan, when asked what dinner was, would reply 'air pie and windy pudding'. She was also fond of informing me that people had a 'face like a bulldog chewing a wasp/lemon/nettles'.

I often ask the kids I work with if they think I came up the Wensum in a bubble when they are having me on. And refer to them as doughnuts when they are being daft.

My Gran used to say 'did ye, aye' to indicate that she did not believe what you had just told her.

You'll see that one on MN.

A teacher at school used to say 'don't stand around like a little lost fart in a perfume factory'

There are so many amusing ones. "You've got a face like a smacked arse" - that one always makes me giggle.

A variation on that was, "Eww, she's got a face like a dog's bum!"
Still on the theme of being distinctly unattractive: "He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down!"
I also loved, "Oh, gawd, look at her! All red hat and no drawers!", "She looks like a bulldog chewing a wasp", and last by no means, least, "Look at the feckin' arse on that!" In mock horror, as a woman with a big, wobbly bum walks by: "like two ducks having a fight under a blanket!"

A neighbour used to call DD a giddy kipper, which was a new one on me.

Mind: blown. My dad (from N Yorks) used this expression all the time, and I assumed some kind of monkey!

I also used to sing the Welsh national anthem at school and thought that there genuinely was a Woggion roming the hills of South Wales (The Woggion - oh free!). Some kind of mystical beast, like a griffin, but larger, with a longer tail and probably green.

(I am a bit of a daft apeth myself, clearly)

I love the thought of the free-range Woggion, @Version4needsabitofwork - I shall think of that whenever I sing the Welsh national anthem!

I love threads like this - the richness of the language, and all the different regional phrases are endlessly fascinating and entertaining.

One of my dad’s favourites was his answer to our question ‘What’s for dinner?’ - ‘Lob scouse and buttered candlesticks!’