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Original poster

Did anyone’s child just reach an age and they miraculously slept through? Or am I kidding myself?

56 replies

Kate3150 · 09/05/2021 06:10

I’ve done a bit of sleep training with my 17 month old over the last couple of weeks. We had a brilliant week but last couple of nights it’s been 3 wake ups 🤦🏼‍♀️.
He gets himself off to sleep at night in his cot so feel that’s a big thing to tackle as I used to shush/Pat until he fell asleep.
Do I just “admit defeat” and wait things out or try something else 🙄

OP posts:
PrawnofthePatriarchy · 09/05/2021 06:19

Don't worry. How many ten year olds don't sleep through the night? At 17 months your son can't be too far off sleeping all night. Just be patient and try not to fret. It'll happen in its own time.

andivfmakes3 · 09/05/2021 06:52

Yes it was when she turned 5 - went from 4 hourly wake ups to sleeping through practically overnight

lovablequalities · 09/05/2021 06:52

He will sleep through without you doing anything in particular. The writers of sleep manuals want you to believe there's a magic set of rules that if you follow them absolutely and to the letter will "fix" your child. If they don't work then it's not the rules that are wrong it is that YOU have FAILED. This way they sell more books because parents are so confused and insecure they are frantic for a solution.

The reality is that almost all kids just learn to do this stuff. They eventually all learn to walk, talk, eat, use the loo, and even sleep all without you doing anything special.

A nice calm bedroom routine helps you feel in control and is comforting for your child and a consistent method of putting them back down if they wake is useful when you are befuddled at 3am but it doesn't matter on the specifics of that because mostly it's just about time. Remember if it doesn't "work" then it's not your fault it's just not time.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

1 year olds Babies & sleep Children's sleep Families
BertieBotts · 09/05/2021 06:55

Yes but both of them were 2.5 years old. It's not something that magically happens early in my experience. As you've got so far through though I would probably just go for the route of least resistance and make that your night time strategy.

WallpaperLady · 09/05/2021 06:55

@andivfmakes3

Yes it was when she turned 5 - went from 4 hourly wake ups to sleeping through practically overnight
Ours was 4/5 too.

Hang in there OP, it could be any day now.

Jenjenn · 09/05/2021 06:56

Yeah, at age 4 though.

Heartofstrings · 09/05/2021 06:57

One was 2.5, one was 4. From experience with my friends that seems pretty typical

InTheGreatGreenRoom · 09/05/2021 06:58

Age 3 we realised she never woke up between 7 and 7 now. Still waiting on dc2 to get there!

MoreAloneTime · 09/05/2021 07:01

Mine slept through all of a sudden for the first time at just older than that. I think what actually happens is they still wake up but just start going meh and going back to sleep. We could sometimes hear it on the monitor.

ZombeaArthur · 09/05/2021 07:02

Ours were 1 and 3, but my oldest was a great sleeper from just a few weeks. My youngest was a bit harder, but still not too bad. With young children, I found that everything is a million times easier/ harder depending on how they sleep.

andivfmakes3 · 09/05/2021 07:02

I agree with @lovablequalities

We tried everything. But I went back to work when she was 20 weeks so in the end DH and I had to sacrifice what some parents might consider "good parenting" for the sake of being able to sleep and actually function at our jobs

I then had twins in January- I was petrified of having 3 children not sleeping through the night - but within 2 days of the twins coming home DD was sleeping through the night on her own and in her own bed every night 🤷‍♀️ - almost like she knew It was time 🥳

Original poster
Kate3150 · 09/05/2021 07:02

Thanks for all your comments 💜
Yes, I do feel like a failure which I know is utterly ludicrous, but i think when you have people saying “do this, don’t do that”. And look at you in disbelief at certain things, it makes you think you’re doing something wrong.....? Especially when they’ve cracked the sleeping through at a young age. X

OP posts:
User24689 · 09/05/2021 07:02

One of mine did it magically at 10 months, the other still wakes 2 hourly at 3. I really do think it's just one of those things.

DinoHat · 09/05/2021 07:04

They say most children sleep through by the age of 2. Mine does probably 80% of the time now, with the odd phase or teething, illness etc.

BertieBotts · 09/05/2021 07:09

Who says that Dino?

OneForTheRoadThen · 09/05/2021 07:14

Yep. But he was 4

Themostwonderfultimeoftheyear · 09/05/2021 07:17

DS is 5 and still only on about 50% of nights sleeping through. He has ditched the early waking though and I know he will get there eventually.

SkankingMopoke · 09/05/2021 07:21

It depends on the reason for the waking (if you can work it out), and then if it is something you can actually do anything about.

With DD1 it magically happened when we switched her to a toddler bed and duvet. It turns out she hates being hot and constricted so was ill suited to the grobag. She was 16mo, had been waking every few hours, and had never STTN despite trying all the usual stuff. After the initial novelty of STTN for the first week, she went back to waking once a night although this was still a fantastic improvement. She finally fully STTN at about 4.5 when starting school wore her out. She'll be 7 next month and still thrashes about in the night, sleeping like a starfish only partially covered by her duvet. We have yet to crack the issues with actually getting her to sleep in the first place 😩
DD2 was naturally a better sleeper (no issues falling asleep, fewer wakings, asks to go to bed when she's tired - she loves sleeping). With her, everything we tried each had a small effect, but like DD1, it was starting school that gave it consistency.

picturesandpickles · 09/05/2021 07:21

Another for age 5 with one child.

I didn't worry about it and I lied to people and said sleep was fine. I just had faith it would work out and it did.

Adults are all different, so makes sense all kids are different.

ZombeaArthur · 09/05/2021 07:22

As my oldest was a good sleeper, parents with children of a similar age would ask us for advice and I told them that I had no advice, we just happened to have a good sleeper. If they wanted tips, they should ask someone who’s child slept poorly as you could guarantee they had tried everything.

Some children sleep well and others don’t, just like adults. Unfortunately there really isn’t much you can do as a parent.

sarge89 · 09/05/2021 07:23

At about 20 months when he gave up his daytime nap. Hang in there OP Smile

lovablequalities · 09/05/2021 07:28

@Kate3150 they haven't "cracked" anything. It just happened. Absolutely nothing your friends/family/acquaintances did made any difference and if they think it did then they are deluded. I reckon just wait til they have another baby...

The child is ready when they are ready. Just like they will walk and talk all by themselves and on their own timescale. Some babies do stuff faster but it doesn't make them better babies and it doesn't make the parents better than you at parenting.

Unless you are doing something insane like giving them haribo and a coke before bed you are probably doing everything to support your child's development at this stage. You are good enough.

MrsJBaptiste · 09/05/2021 07:48

6 months (DS1)
8 months (DS2)

andivfmakes3 · 09/05/2021 07:48

@DinoHat

They say most children sleep through by the age of 2. Mine does probably 80% of the time now, with the odd phase or teething, illness etc.

I was told it's more like age 7 🥛

FrenchFancie · 09/05/2021 07:57

Dad was a shockingly bad sleeper at that age - but it was also about then that she dropped all daytime naps, and when I finally gave in trying to get her to sleep during the day, really quickly after that she just started to sleep through at night 7-7 and has remained a fairly good sleeper ever since.

Everyone always looks horrified when I say she stopped napping at 18 months though....