"No hat, no outside" not working. Been trapped inside with toddler for 4 days.

[SelfBuild]

Toddler (22 months) will not wear a sun hat, only a wooly bobble hat, we've tried 5 different sun hats with his favourite things on. Just not working. Went out last week and it was hot and he'd only put a bobble hat on and he was sodden with sweat afterwards.

So I toughened up, put the bobble hat out of sat and have lined up a selection of sun hats next to his shoes by the door. Everytime for the last 4 days he's asked to go in the garden, for a walk or to the park we've had the "no hat, no play/no go outside" argument. He will not back down and just tears it off so we haven't left the house. It's so sunny and nice and I'm just stuck indoors with a cranky toddler who hasn't had a proper run around in days but neither of us will back down.

What do I do?

I don’t know if this has already been said as I’ve only read the first couple of pages but a trick that’s worked with all my children is telling them the opposite of what you actually want them to do.

Try making a big deal of the sun hats how nice they are and that they are for big boys etc, then tell him he is definitely not allowed to wear a sun hat, no they’re not for him. When he protests and then wants to wear it let out a sigh and say “ah ok then just this once” Sounds ridiculous but appears to have an incredibly high success rate

Yeah you will learn to pick your battles

@InTheFamilyTree

Where do you live, the Maldives?? Seriously, it's April, the sun is not some mythical beast of Satan, just go!

This

Oof, if you are this tough on a bloody sun hat, your next 14 years of parenting are going to be very unpleasant!

My husband has some mild sunburn from yesterday and we are in Scotland so I’d want a hat on him too. I think I’d just put the wooly one mind you if he tolerated that.

At 22 months I’d just say it’s a sun hat or they have to stay in the pushchair with the hood up. My DC is a similar age so I am expecting the same battle soon enough, they will be their choices for the hottest of days, other days I’ll just try and get by on suncream tbh. What about scalp spray? I have a sensitive scalp so spray factor 30 on my head, it’s not greasy and keeps sunburn away, doubt it will help with sunstroke though, but that shouldn’t be a problem in April.

@audweb

Sun cream?

This.

Why is it such an issue for you? It's not even summer yet.

You can get suncream hair spray style stuff of amazon. Problem solved

Are you wearing a hat yourself, Op? That will help him to understand that hats are worn outside in sunny weather.
A canopy or shade may work as an alternative.

Try not to get into a stand off situation with him. Are you asking him to put it on (allows the option of saying “No!”) or telling him?
A better way might be to give him the choice of two hats, which will he choose? It gives him some control without allowing a veto that you can’t agree to.

He wears his hat and, if he takes it off, you persevere with putting it back on and warn him that, if he keeps taking it off, you’ll take him indoors, or he’ll have to stay under the shade or whatever you want to use as a consequence - and follow it up. You bring him indoors if he tantrums or behaves badly (after a time in the garden, of course).

It is a difficult age. We used to have a child that flung hers straight in the water table so she couldn’t wear it. Luckily, I had a supply of spares

Have you seen Jan and Jul hats? We got ours from Amazon. Lovely designs and the only hat I ever found that DC couldn’t rip off (it had a toggle under the chin and another around their head). They would struggle with it for ten minutes or so then forget about it and get distracted with playing outside. Even our DC who is diagnosed with autism and has tons of problems with clothing wears his.

@DownWhichOfLate

Air temperature and uv levels aren’t the same thing, to those saying it isn’t August. UV levels in the UK are at their highest in June. So, yes, you can easily burn in April and May if you are particularly fair.

This! In the real world, everyone knows it can be both cold and sunny. But apparently on Mumsnet, half of posters think cold weather magically makes fair-skinned people immune to sunburn 🙄

I'm careful in the sun and the times I've been caught out have been when it was windy, as the wind made me feel less hot so I forgot to top up my sun cream or move to the shade. Wind doesn't blow away UV rays!

No hat.

We used to live in Egypt

Hats would stay on DS head for a maximum of 20 seconds

Make sure the skin is creamed, take him out outside of the peak sunshine and he’ll be fine

My little one is now 15, 6’2” and he still won’t wear hats

Although he has an enormous Afro so doesn’t need to :)

Don’t sweat this stuff

God ignore people telling you that your crazy to put him in a sunhat in April! Your not. It's good to get them used to it, especially as we are approaching summer! I do remember when Ds was a similar age just kept popping it back on when ever I noticed it was off! Keep him busy with toys or a snack to distract. So with regards to going out I'd just say let's go out, get him ready and put a cap on him. Then keep putting it on him, once he rips it off, honestly give it a week or so of going out and keep putting it back on his head and he will soon get fed up and leave it on.

I don't get it - if the goal is to protect his scalp, then why can't he wear the bobble hat? If he won't wear either, and his scalp is exposed enough to burn, then put sun cream on his scalp.

My oldest hates hats (like me!) so I feel the pain of trying to 'win' that battle (he would also take hats off other children - such fun!), but you need to be a LOT more flexible in your approach if you want to stay sane.

Deciding on one singular way of doing things from the options available and then persisting with that even when that is making you miserable is going to drive you both mad.

From the NHS:

Take extra care to protect babies and children. Their skin is much more sensitive than adult skin, and damage caused by repeated exposure to sunlight could lead to skin cancer developing in later life.

Children aged under 6 months should be kept out of direct strong sunlight.

From March to October in the UK, children should:

• cover up with suitable clothing.
• spend time in the shade, particularly from 11am to 3pm.
• wear at least SPF30 sunscreen.

www.nhs.uk/live-well/healthy-body/sunscreen-and-sun-safety/

This seems bonkers to me.

Anybody rubbishing the OP on this clearly doesn’t have children with incredibly fair skin.

And yet a few of us have said we do
OP needs to pick her battles and put it into perspective, she hasn't been out the for 4 days!

I can't believe some people wear sun cream all year round, in the UK. Rubbing all those chemicals into your skin rather than getting a bit of sun/vit D. Baffling.

I haven't read all the answers, but my solution has been modelling - I wear a hat, my toddler wears a hat, and explaining why we both wear hats.

The problem with keeping out of the sun entirely is that any lapse and you’re much more likely to have an actual burn. It’s not a bad idea to build up a little tolerance to the sun.

I’m sorry but I live in Australia and still find this odd! Seriously just go out and take the hat with you. Try put it on when he is distracted and busy. But otherwise don’t worry too much. unless you’re going to be out in the full sun for hours and hours all day? Surely it’s just for things like going to play at the park.

@SelfBuild

Only mumsnet can make out your insane for wanting to try and prevent a very fair child from burning. I'm off, thanks anyway.

Because lots of them also have fair children and know this is not an issue. When it is hot you can tell him he has to wear it because it is hot, rather than training him to wear it now., but lots of children won't wear/keep hats on and their families do not confine themselves to the house all summer.

@elizabethdraper

They 22 months, you are on a losing battle. They haven't a clue why they need a hat.

Just cover in suncream and head off

I second this.

A toddler digging their heels in has more staying power than most adults.

The scalp spray is a life saver OP. Hair gets a bit greasy but better greasy hair than a burned head.

Other than that just make sure you take some juice outside and take plenty of breaks in the shade where possible.

I completely understand OP. My son's ears are really sensitive to the sun and burned in February so he is not allowed out without a sun hat on on a sunny day. Unfortunately I have no advice for you as he has always been happy to wear a hat.

I'd put suncream on his head, it will look greasy but better than being burnt.