What age daughters getting eye brows don't?? Just seen fb post.. Age 11 due to bullies..

[Springisspringing2]

Just wonder as my dd doesn't shave legs nor mentions brows etc.. She's nearly 14.

It's a "how long is a piece of string" question. My friend and her DD have naturally delicate eyebrows comprised of about 20 hairs each, so in their case it wasn't an issue, ever. DD and I, on the other hand, could easily join the cast of Schitt's Creek, so it DID become an issue at age 11 or 12 for both of us.

Different people, different timescales.

See also, leg hair, moustache etc etc.

Leg shaving 10/11 (year 6)
Eyebrows/armpits 11 (year 7)

It's tricky isn't it!
I want her know of all the options.. But not make her feel its something she has to do!
I do want to save her hacking away at legs with a razor like I did though.

@Springisspringing2

No sparkling Brook, this is the point of my post.

She seems blissfully unaware of this and if her friends are also not into it all nor their mums... How would she know?

And if she does what has she been exposed too eg.. Slug eyebrows or waxing legs....

I could lay out all the pro and cons of hair removal to her... This is the point..

But I'm reluctant too, because she's so unaware at the moment.

At nearly 14 so I am surprised at that, but you know your own daughter. Does she see you doing these things?

If she knew and I knew she knew, what would be the point of this post

No she doesn't see me in the shower naked shaving my legs.

No she doesn't accompany me to get my underarm waxed nor get my eye brows waxed and plucked.

@Springisspringing2

If she knew and I knew she knew, what would be the point of this post

No she doesn't see me in the shower naked shaving my legs.

No she doesn't accompany me to get my underarm waxed nor get my eye brows waxed and plucked.

She must know you do those things. She knows you don't have hair on your legs or underarms and your eyebrows are neat without actually seeing it happen. So that could be the start of a conversation.

She seems blissfully unaware of this and if her friends are also not into it all nor their mums... How would she know?

If she thinks her eyebrows and body hair are perfectly fine, why does she need to know? If you start talking about options, she'll feel that it's something that she has to do.

@Springisspringing2

It's tricky isn't it! I want her know of all the options.. But not make her feel its something she has to do! I do want to save her hacking away at legs with a razor like I did though.

This is exactly what happened to me and my mother didn’t buy me a proper razor. I lived in a very controlling household and only did things I was expressly allowed to do. I hadn’t been given permission to buy a razor and she scoffed at my desire to shave as she didn’t have enough hairs on her legs to shave. She begrudgingly gave me my dad’s old butterfly razor from 1960’s and I peeled off great chunks out of my skin. I felt nothing at the time, but the pain after...

So yes, for this reason, I would absolutely talk to your dd as I did to mine.

I first shaved my legs and tried fake tan in year 6 and I think my nail polish obsession started around the same time. Eyebrows I started in early secondary school and really wish I hadn't touched them as they never recovered from my repeated over-plucking. Hair dying began in year 8 but I dread to think how uneven it must've been

I had an older sister and read a lot of her (highly inappropriate!) magazines and we used to go shopping in town spending ages in Boots, Superdrug and The Body Shop. I was very interested in skincare, perfume and make up.

I don't think it's a bad thing to be interested in, nor do I think it's a bad thing not to be interested 🤷‍♀️ If it's not bothering her then I wouldn't let it bother you.

Maybe having an older sibling makes a difference. I was always quite keen to grow up.

And yes, if you buy a decent razor there's no need to be hacking at anything.

There's a really good chance she isn't as unaware as you think she is. She presumably has access to the internet and magazines etc. You might be surprised.

Help, ironically younger sister is already very into her looks! Very self conscious and aware.... I am going to have different issues on my hands when it comes to her... But she has different colouring and hair to dd1, whose blonde but has quite thick dark hair...

They are poles apart in looks and attitudes

My mum didn’t allow me to shave my legs as a 14 year old, god knows why. I used to wait till she was out to use her electric shaver

She’ll know.

I have a load of disposable razors in the bathroom, along with shaving gel. Mine just helped themselves when they decided to start shaving, probably around 12/13.

Shaving isn’t rocket science and if you have modern clean safety razors it’s pretty hard to make a serious mess of it.

I’m going back to the 80 s though a long time ago

Mine is 14, nearly 15.

Last year she was really bothered about shaving and eye brows. This year, she doesn't bother. I wondered if going back to school might make a difference. It didn't.

Speaking to her about it, there are some girls in her year who are very bothered about appearances, and looking sexy/attractive and post inappropriate (in even her opinion) of themselves on their Instagram pages; some who are vaguely interested in shaving but can't really be bothered (I suppose like her) and others who don't care.

From what I see of her friends, it depends to reflect how important it is to their mums.

Eg, the ones whose mums booked hairdresser appointments and bought them heels for the year 6 prom are more bothered than the ones whose mums didn't.

Garden that's really true re lock down actually and being out of the school environment

Also agree about the mums lead on this.. We all seem to be older mums at dd school with less emphasis on this...

I've tried to be careful around body imagine to be honest..

Just let her know that if she decides to do her legs then you'll get it sorted for her. My 12yr old doesn't do it yet either, whereas I need every gadget going for my body hair.

Im in my late 40s and I don't think i have ever 'done' my brows. why assume she will?

They are entitled to paint on slugs at any age I imagine. If they want to totally dominate their face with immense Denise Healy brows so be it.

No matter how “careful” you are about body image at home, they’ll still hear it from peers. I remember being 11/12 and my mum helping me to shave my pits for pe lol eyebrows round about the same age. Legs maybe the following year as my hairs were blonde so not as noticeable. My mum bought me a lady shaver so safer! My DD is 9 and already noticing body hair

It all depends on the child. My daughter is very pale but her leg hair is very very dark and noticeable- she removed leg hair from 11- I did try to get her to hang on but she was very self conscious. We are also blessed/cursed with thick hairy eyebrows and she begged me to take them to get them waxed from around 13 - she had them done when she was 14. She not a particularly girly girl doesn’t wear makeup but the hair made her very self conscious so I took the lead from her.

I think if you have a family culture where body things aren't taboo and the fact that the body changes and we might have to adjust our behaviour (shower more often eg) is something that comes up from time to time, it wouldn't be weird to just drop a comment along the lines of she can always come to you if she wants advice no judgement and leave it at that. No need to be specific just keep an open door feel to the whole topic of body function etc.
How did the dealing with periods thing go with you both, was it straight forward, relaxed, open? If so, I imagine she'd all of she needed to.
My own mum was dreadful at all this stuff so at least I had fantastic lessons in how not to do it.

All = ask