What makes your house popular?

[AllotmentTime]

I’m looking forward to play dates when we can have people INDOORS

My DCs’ best friends both have amazing gardens and we can’t compete for space and toys there. We have a nice enough house but I want to make their friends feel like they’ve had a good time when they come (and not like “well that was like being at home except no space or big fun toys” which is what garden play dates are like!!)

What have you done that’s been super popular with your DCs’ friends when they come over? All still primary age so not at the gaming stage yet.

Thanks in advance

We used to have an outdoor table tennis table when kids were teenagers. Also an indoor snooker table (not full size). Two DS.

Another thing was we lived less than half a mile from the local cinema so kids could meet at ours and walk to the cinema together (feels quite grown up when you are in your early/mid teens in London).

By letting people relax without hovering and having preplanned activities unless birthday or something. Never called them play dates just do your mates want to come round. Being friendly and talking with them like people. Asking if there was something in particular they would like to do. Not constantly offering food and drink instead they'd ask or help themselves especially to drinks..

Used to hate the school run sometimes as kids would always be asking if they could come over and weird comments from parents because they were baffled why my place was so popular when they had x,y and z and could do all these amazing things.

The kids would also do homework together, school projects, watch a film, and even read (yea that was weird)

Food and also a relaxed friendly home. Make them feel comfortable.

I wouldn't say my house is popular now except with me but I used to have lots of kids here when mine was a child. They all enjoyed themselves because we let them do what they liked within reason and I fed them well. It was fun and safe.

Mumsnet even gets competitive about playmates A divide between the benign neglecters and the superhosts!

Always plenty of food and drink, also an element of letting them get on with it. As teens our house became hugely popular because they could have the kitchen diner and conservatory so quite a big space and very separate.

I want to say it's my laid-back attitude and my children's delightful personalities but right now I know my kids' friends just want to come round to try the chocolate fountain we got in lockdown. Honestly, OP, £20. It's a winner. Guaranteed popularity. Just don't have cream carpets.

@CateTown

Mumsnet even gets competitive about playmates A divide between the benign neglecters and the superhosts!

My vote goes to the benign neglecters as long as keep one eye on things.

I think you’re looking at this through an adults eyes. Kids don’t give a shit about the size of hour house and the stuff you have, they are just wanting to spend time together.

Maybe and I do understand the PPs saying I’m overthinking this. I wouldn’t tend to do structured things, I’m thinking more of stuff that lets me and the other mum drink tea in place!

And yes they do want to just hang out together and yes the attraction is my DC and no they don’t want to be micro managed. BUT when the choice is all that stuff at a house with an amazing garden, or all that stuff at my place, how do I make the two seem equally attractive?

itsgettingwierd chalk is a good idea, we have a good driveway for chalking too

Hebe that sounds BRILLIANT but I do sadly have cream carpets 🤣

Thanks to those suggesting dens- my DCs’ beds are very close together at the moment and very den-convertable. I will have old sheets handy

Strangekindofwoman ah yes I’m sure calling play dates something different will COMPLETELY solve the problem, thanks so much

fabulousathome and secretcidercellar we already have a table tennis table (DC can’t reach it as yet) and we are nearly next door to the local secondary school, so hopefully in seven years or so I will be in here posting about how to get rid of the excess teenagers

A dog, a puppy, 2 guinea pigs and a bearded dragon. An old guitar. Toilet roll tubes and recycling for junk modelling. Blankets etc for dens. Freedom to chase up and down stairs. A house old enough for them to convince themselves it’s haunted (plus a cellar!)

I have teenage boys..

And a freezer full of cheap pizzas

Ha, soooo many things on this thread have made me think “shit we don’t have THAT either!!!” Howmanysleepsnow we have no pets but our friends do, and we live in a new build 🤣🤣 I should just give up!

2021’s to-do list does include “get cat”, though, so things could improve. Note to self: get extremely cuddly patient cat who wants to endlessly play with smallish children!

@SecretCiderCellar it’s in an actual tree. It’s a bit wonky and not at all comfortable and an absolute pain to keep the spiders off. Our own dc don’t use it much except when friends come. It’s also where they hide when it’s time to go home 🙄

We also have a cat but he’s a vicious creature that we have to lock away from visitors.

I don't complain about the mess too much and I buy more glue for making slime when they run out.

I'm willing to host sleepovers.

We have quite a big garden - there is a trampoline in one corner and comfy seating in the opposite corner. Nerf gun wars are usually popular...

I give my children’s friends pizza bases, they do their own toppings, then we cook in the pizza oven. S’mores for pudding over a fire pit.

In the summer, I’ll put a good sized paddling pool up and then leave them to their own devices.

Keep it simple...

Apparently what made my house popular with the DC friends was that there was a lot of food and snacks and I paid little attention to who or how many kids were here.

One of their friends said last year Your Mum was brilliant cos she just left us alone. They are almost 30 now.

@MadMadMadamMim

Apparently what made my house popular with the DC friends was that there was a lot of food and snacks and I paid little attention to who or how many kids were here.

One of their friends said last year Your Mum was brilliant cos she just left us alone. They are almost 30 now.

This is what made my house popular as a teen. We were just left alone. I grew up in a town house so my bedroom was two floors away from the kitchen too which helped as that's where my mum generally was.

It helps being 3 mins from school, and when they're a little older there's a grassy area behind the garden that will help with the small garden.

Lots of good food and snacks and just having a relaxed environment. I generally hate playdates as I find them to be very restrictive (I'll drop Jonny off at 1.30 and pick him up at 3) which means that the children feel under pressure to do everything they want in a short time. I much prefer a longer playdate where a meal is involved.

If they are over the age of 7 I would never set up activities for them, they are old enough to find their own things to do. If you are fussy about the house then there is no point in bringing out paint/glitter but constantly breathing down their necks to be careful etc.

Nice snacks help.

we have the smallest house of all my DC's friends, and can't compete on space/toys etc.
but I let them cook, which is always a winner. Other than that I leave them to it.
oh, and no pressure meal times - lots of kid-friendly food out in dishes to help themselves, and I am not bothered who eats what.

I have a designated "help yourself shelf" in the fridge (fruit, yoghurt, babybel, juice cartons etc) and the same in the cupboard (mini cheddar, breadsticks, raisins)

The playroom is a mega jumble of toys and I don't care how messy it gets.

Same goes for the garden - bubbles, chalks, water play, I don't mind what the kids do and I leave them to it. I don't supervise play, but I am there to join in playing if I'm invited to!

Fully depends on the kids, type of play date, ages etc... most of my DCs friends parents aren’t precious about food so when they come to my house the snack draw is always a firm favourite. If I’m doing food it will always be something easy they will enjoy, pizza, hot dogs etc..

Don’t micromanage or have a agenda, just let the kids have fun, if they are bored then have something as a back up for them to do. You will find most kids entertain themselves.

I had a bit of a girly get together last year when restrictions where eased, 2 DDs had 2 friends each so 6 girls aged 3-6, put cupcake holder in the middle of the table with sandwiches, plain cupcakes, put some icing & sugar decorations in bowls on the table, they had a very girly princess afternoon tea and decorated their own cupcakes. No supervision, just left them to it. There were plenty of toys in the play room, there came and went in the garden. The only thing I did was grab a bunch off dress up stuff from the bedrooms and put it on a little pink rail I had in the play room so they didn’t need to go upstairs into the bedrooms.

Had a great catch up with the mums with very little distractions with the kids. There was a mess after but because it was restricted to certain parts of the house it’s far easier to clean up and I don’t have to worry about anything nice being ruined.

It also depends on what kind of house you run. Our front room is a no go area with kids on play dates but they are free to go anywhere else downstairs. Upstairs I have rules but I will vary them depending on the children. My older DCs best friends have been coming round for years, I know them, know they are well mannered and behaved kids, there parents are like me when it comes to respecting other peoples homes. So they are allowed upstairs but younger kids or ones I don’t know how they will behave it’s a no go area. Kids whose parents don’t teach them respect and discipline bad behaviour don’t get many invites back.

Food, snacks, not caring how many there were as long as they behaved. Some liked to just hang out, some did like to join in if I was baking or doing something crafty as I often did to amuse myself whilst they played.

Cheap Morrisons trifle.