Did you leave home knowing how to cook?

[lemorella]

I left home so unprepared for adulthood.

I arrived at uni and thought it was perfectly fine to live off peanut butter. I didn't start cooking properly until I met my DH in my mid 20s and was trying to impress him. I just taught myself through a bit of trial and error and the bbc good food website. I love cooking now and do most of it as it's my way to unwind. I was never involved with any cooking when I lived at home and was never asked to contribute to the household in any way chores-wise.

I also had no idea how to manage money, I could set up and pay bills just fine but constantly lived in my overdraft despite having a job through uni and a good loan, then subsequently an okay paying job. It wasn't until I started saving for a house that I learned to budget.

I don't blame my parents at all for my hopelessness but I can't believe they let me be so lazy and contribute so little to the household when I lived there and then let me leave home never having cooked a meal! (We were quite poor not that that makes a difference, always had food in the house).

Did anyone else leave home the same way or did you have parents who instilled the life skills needed in you?

Not at all. My mum cooked nice meals, but cooking was ‘her’ time when she had the kitchen to herself, listened to her music and had a cheeky glass of wine (on weekends). Us kids were never invited or told to help out, and the importance of knowing how to cook a simple meal wasn’t explained to us.

Same with washing and cleaning. Mum had a complicated laundry sorting system and we were not allowed to clean our own clothes, and we only cleaned our own rooms as we would do other cleaning ‘wrong’.

It wasn’t that us kids had an easy, spoilt life, my mum wanted to control how everything was done and stop us learning independent life skills.

Cooking isn't just about making the meal, it's also knowing timings/ knowing where to get the best/cheapest ingredients/ how to store food pre and after preparation, good food hygiene/ eating healthily and portion control etc etc

Competent adults can of course pick these things up if not taught at home. I think these things should be part of home life!

I could cook simple meals, but only in a very 1970s/80s meat and potatoes kind of way. That a whole world of flavor I thought limited only to restaurants in big cities could make its way into my kitchen was not something I yet knew. I didn’t even know I could make tacos at home.

Yes I left home being able to cook. My mom is a big foodie and I spent lots of time buying ingredients, cooking meals, watching cooking show etc with her. Home Economics was compulsory in my school for two years so we were taught things like budgeting, basic home repairs and cooking.

Yes, but such boring bland food and no baking beyond making banana loaf. I've learnt a lot from that point, but my folks taught me how to cook and clean and wash and iron, so I had basic skills to expand my repertoire to things that suit my tastes.

Aiming to do the same with my children. Although I make them do things, it's probably not often enough and not as often as I had to growing up as my parents worked FT so everyone had to chip in and I'm currently PT and WFH so do the lion's share.

married young at 18 (1974) but my mom was a good plain cook so she had taught me how to do basic meals and stews and pastry so we didnt starve and over the years learnt how to cook more things so my childen ate well wirthout breaking the bank and now there is more choice of ingredients cooking is a pleasure though the kids have left home

Nope...we used to go to Iceland and buy a variety of frozen meat products and alternate them with waffles and oven chips!
Dm bought me a delia smith cookbook for Christmas the year after I got married, and I remember being astounded at how easy it actually was to follow a recipe and produce good food!
The same year we had dd and I wanted to cook proper food for her so that was a big turning point too. I’m a great cook now!

Yes my mother was an excellent cook and I learned from her, plus I’m old enough that domestic science involved cooking proper food so that added to the repertoire. Both of my sons and my daughter were capable cooks when they left home and all three enjoy it.

No. I'd never used a washing machine either! My dp's were a bit rubbish really when it came to teaching us how to adult effectively. I'd never had a bank account, had no idea about savings/mortgages/pensions, had no idea how to pay the gas bill etc.

I left home a couple of weeks after my 21st birthday (I didn’t go to uni straight after school so I was working full time) and I had never made a full meal or even put a load of laundry on. My flat mate had to teach me to use the washing machine

Thankfully I picked everything up quickly! I’m a decent cook, an even better baker, I’ve finally become a little bit houseproud and I’m bloody great at DIY. I rebuilt the smashed-up interior corner in my study using drywall and tape after watching a YouTube tutorial and even replaced some pipes under the kitchen sink, which made me feel like Wonder Woman

You’d never know I was so hapless 10 years ago!

No. After a while I got bored with eating rubbish and bought a couple of cookbooks and learned.

The effect of the irish mammy on both me and most of my friends. Thought zero skills god forbid if you tried to do anything at home. Wasn't barely allowed to boil the kettle in my teens never mind make a dinner No basic life skills at all. I learned everything after I moved out. My mother is still horrified that I get my lot to do stuff around the house !

*Taught

I could cook and was confident in the kitchen. We had cooking lessons in school (y6&7) that we’re aimed at teaching how to cook basic meals from scratch but I mainly learned at home. From about age 14 my brother and I were responsible for dinner one night a week each. By the time I was in the 6th form I was hosting 4 course dinner parties/fancy picnics/Massive brunches for friends.

I’m in my early 50s and this wasn’t uncommon at the time, especially for girls, but not universal either. At uni about half of my first year flat could cook. I think it was partly class related, none of the private school women could when they arrived (they also had no idea how to do laundry, especially in a coin-op, and couldn’t wire a plug or change the tire or oil on a car, all things I thought were pretty essential!). My Dh learnt to cook in college and became a dab hand quickly but lacked confidence until he did a cooking course in his early 30s.

One of my 11yr olds bakes regularly but isn’t that interested in savoury stuff yet, she’s developing skills, though. The other can do a bit but really isn’t interested. She’s told me she needs to learn cheap basic recipes before she goes to college, though and there’s plenty of time for that.

Left home in early 2000's (and I was young 20's so not overly young) and couldn't cook.

Over the years I have mastered the basics and have a few things that are actually "requested" but almost 20 years after leaving home I am not a good cook. I don't enjoy it, if I experiment it fucks up and even if I follow recipes it is never amazing.

Oddly enough my sister is the same but both my brothers are the cooks at their respective homes (same parents, same exposure etc) and their food always tastes amazing.

My mum - who sadly died recently - wasn't much of a cook herself but neither was / is my dad.

I wasn't and still am not much of a homemaker either we were all given general chores but never taught to actually do XYZ.

No I couldn't cook, couldn't manage money, couldn't change a lightbulb or do laundry. I had to lear in my first year at uni. Luckily belfry I had any dependants

I have been a good cook since I was really young, but mainly because my DM was an awful cook and it was cool or starve!

No I couldn't cook. I could do a jacket potato and somehow became goods at sausage casserols. Food don't interest me at all. I ate very little as a child and young adult. i was good with money as mum always instilled in me not to spend more than you have.

@IWishIWasABaller

The effect of the irish mammy on both me and most of my friends. Thought zero skills god forbid if you tried to do anything at home. Wasn't barely allowed to boil the kettle in my teens never mind make a dinner No basic life skills at all. I learned everything after I moved out. My mother is still horrified that I get my lot to do stuff around the house !

My Irish mammy only had this attitude towards the boys - they couldn't be expected to do anything - even when we came to stay, she'd be shoving dh into the living room saying he didn't need to help - weird as she always expected Daddy to do his share - he was a much better cook, not that we'd have ever said that out loud!

Yes of course, could do basic family cooking by 12 and my DD's were the same