I'm off to the pub...

[purrswhileheeats]

Afternoon off work today so I'd planned to have a couple of friends round (it's allowed here) for wine and crisps in the garden 🍷However Mother Nature has scuppered our plans so I've decided to 'go to the pub' instead The pub is in Liverpool or Dublin and has the following:

Open fire
Pool table
Jukebox
Free, unlimited brandy
Strapping but polite men

Who'd like to join me? I'll save you a seat

. OBVS!!

(oh god I'm shrill all ready, I'd better switch to beer)

@Iamblossom

Fucking love those nuts too.

Oooh what to wear....jeans for comfort, sloppy joe jumper, maybe off the shoulder baggy one with a vest top? Short boots.

Oh I will have fags. Only ever smoke when I go to the pub. I KNOW RIGHT? Who's my best friend now?

Me I’m a Secret Pissed Fag Cadger so once the night gets going and I’ve had a few snakebites with @Lovelydiscusfish I’ll be out the back with you nicking your smokes and misguidedly imagining i can chat up much younger pubgoers (i’m 33, so am JUST edging into MiLF territory...i think?!)

Pint of peroni and do they do chips? I'll share!

@Iamblossom

. OBVS!!

(oh god I'm shrill all ready, I'd better switch to beer)

TEQUILA ANYONE?!

@MrsTerryPratchett

Oh I will have fags. Only ever smoke when I go to the pub. I KNOW RIGHT? Who's my best friend now?

Budge up. I haven't smoked for 20 years but these are non-addictive fags that don't smell, right?

I’m in. Can there be a weird by-law in the pub garden which renders menthols legal again?

@purrswhileheats although you must be on your 4th brandy by now, that's a hardcore afternoon drink of choice right there....

"Secret Pissed Fag Cadger" -

I'm in. Large glass of Cab Sav and a bag of cheese n onion crisps with a picked egg thrown in! Thank you!

"TEQUILA ANYONE?! grin" - see this will be our problem, we'll all be shedded by 5.30

I'd forgotten about snakebite!! 😳 It's on special offer at 90s prices and includes a pass to A&E 😅

Thanks Knit, please make sure I don't give him my number

@Iamblossom

"Secret Pissed Fag Cadger" -

That’s a future username right there for me i think!

@purrswhileheeats

I'd forgotten about snakebite!! 😳 It's on special offer at 90s prices and includes a pass to A&E 😅

Thanks Knit, please make sure I don't give him my number

@purrswhileheeats now - ‘oh no, that creepy little man in an anorak over there keeps giving me the eye, gather round me ladies!’

@purrswhileheeats in four hours time after a few more brandies - ‘LEAVE ME AND ANORAK MAN ALONE, WE’RE IN LOVE!’

@purrswhileheeats

I'd forgotten about snakebite!! 😳 It's on special offer at 90s prices and includes a pass to A&E 😅

Thanks Knit, please make sure I don't give him my number

The other great thing about snakebite (as well as the fact that it is just FUCKING GREAT) is that it will instantly make us all irreparably attractive to the Strapping Men. Snakebite does that. It’s magical stuff.

By the way, I am readily available throughout the evening to stagger over to any of the numerous Strapping Men who should be lucky enough to catch your eye, ladies, and inform him that “my mate fancies you”.

I'm there. Happy with a pint or a glass or red, depends what sort of night we're having. Packet of cheese & onion too, please.

Is there going to be a quiz?

Iamblossom I'm a Saturday Smoker so have sneaked in a packet for you. I do lose lighters though so don't lend me your Zippo 🧐

I wish I hadn’t open this thread, I’d really like a cold glass of Sauvignon blanc now, but it’s only Wednesday!

I’ll add a side order of the scapula fries. Sounds like an interesting new snack, I image they’re a bit like spare ribs

Did someone say quiz? I'm in though I can get a tad competitive. Pint of peroni and some salt'n'vinegar crisps please.

And I'll have @askmeagainin5allaskmeagainin5's DD on my team as she'll know the answers to the pop culture questions that I am too old for. And a strapping but polite man who knows the answers to the inevitable tedious footy questions.

Shall we do shots ?

Any pork scratchings behind the bar, save me a packet, I'm on my way.

Quiz and shots sound great; I'm all fired up but I think we should politely wait for the evening crowd?

Anorak man will be fine in the corner for now

OMG this thread is making me a bit teary. I'll have a large gin and tonic and a packet of scampi fries.

Can i have a seat?? I'd like a chip butty and a large Malbec :-D
And a magazine for light reading if they have any laying around

I’ll have a glass of cold dry rose and I’ve just ordered a cheese board for us all. I might wander to the jukebox in a minute. Anyone got any change?

please can i come? i dont drink anything other than diet coke but im happy to be designated driver.
i also come bearing fags, can have normal or menthol and i have around 30 lighters scattered in the bottom of my hand bag