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Original poster

Does anyone have a major personality change on the pill?

46 replies

smellyolddog · 23/02/2021 22:20

Not sure where to post so thought I'd just chat–I've been on the pill for about 6 months to calm down some symptoms and I've just come off again, it was OK, but not a fan of staying on it.

I've realised with reflection how passive, empty and somewhat calmer I am while on the pill, and how confident and fiery and full of energy I am off the pill–but now I can't decide which me is really me!

I feel really disassociated with who I am right now like i've really lost track of the real me somewhere with the hormones, even to the point over the last 6 months my actions, choices and decisions seem alien to me.

I'm also 46, so that may explain it.

Does anyone else have such a massive shift?? and how do i decide which is the real side of me, I liked the calm side.

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cheesebubble · 23/02/2021 22:25

You take medication every single day of your life and children at the age of 14/15 are being told it's completely normal to take it. That's how old I was when I was prescribed the pill and realised at 21 that I never went to take the pill again.

Found this on Instagram the other day.

Does anyone have a major personality change on the pill?
MoMuntervary · 23/02/2021 22:30

Yup, it blighted my late teens. Made me anxious and timid. I think 'passive and empty' would have struck a chord at the time, too. It was a revelation when I came off it my twenties. I've been offered it for various symptoms of the perimenopause but won't touch it.

Original poster
smellyolddog · 23/02/2021 22:42

@cheesebubble I saw that one which is one of the reasons I've come off it against GP's advice but I'm staggered by the almost instant change in me, when I started it it must of been a gradual change.

I feel like I've just been drifting for the last 6 months, and now I feel very odd but I'm not sure at 46 where i stand with all of these new personalities i seem to have.

I was on it from 16 to 25 as well but i didn't get the same large change, and had a good fun time during those years.

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TangerineGenie · 23/02/2021 22:44

I found it an excellent contraceptive - put me off sex completely

Original poster
smellyolddog · 23/02/2021 22:45

@TangerineGenie thats the other thing, I'm so horny now I'm not on it.

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MMMarmite · 23/02/2021 22:46

@TangerineGenie

I found it an excellent contraceptive - put me off sex completely
Same for me with the minipill. When i was on it, I no longer needed it! Grin
SheeshazAZ09 · 23/02/2021 22:47

Read the book The Bitter Pill by dr Ellen grant. You will never want to go near the pill again.

WhattheCBGeebie · 23/02/2021 22:53

Interesting but very long book on the subject: How the pill changes everything by Dr Sarah. E. Hill.

Don't count on your Gp having read it.

Botoxtime · 23/02/2021 22:56

Took it for 11 years and I'm convinced it contributed to fertility issues.

Blue2021 · 23/02/2021 23:03

Yes! I stopped taking it at 22. I have tried around 10 different ones between 16-22 years old. I went through varied responses of it but worst being very tearful all the time, quite depressed and very anxious. I literally cried for like 2 weeks it was horrible. I was that bad my flat mate (who was also my best friend) threatened to move out as I was so sad all the time. I will never take it against I have been off it completely for 9 years.

MegaClutterSlut · 23/02/2021 23:05

I was a total bitch especially to dh on the pill. I was just so angry all the time and didn't want him anywhere near me or breathing will never take it again

wtfisgoingonhere21 · 23/02/2021 23:06

Thyroxine has the same effect on me Hmm

Changed me over the last few years added along with natural hormones changing.

wonderstuff · 23/02/2021 23:11

I get severe depression on the pill. I'll never forgive the gp who dismissed my concerns about it when I went for a follow up appointment at 17. Took it for another year and I was utterly miserable. Tried again at 19, because I was told a change of brand might work, but again I became a shadow of myself. I'll never take hormonal contraceptives again.

I felt very low when I was pregnant, I imagine it's all related? I've never been diagnosed but I suspect I have PCOS not sure if that has an impact? Women's health is such a neglected part of medicine I don't imagine anyone really has all the answers.

BonesJones · 23/02/2021 23:13

Weirdly enough, I'm a terrible person when I'm not on the pill. But only one specific type. It was discontinued a while ago and firstly all my hair fell out, then I noticed I was ragingly angry all the time when not on it. I don't feel its the pill that has saved me from being an absolute monster though, I was nice before I started taking it. I feel like it's actually changed me in some fundemental hormonal way. Then in a cold quest to find a new one (because I had no hair), i had four months of varying degrees of furious, suicidal, hyperactive, lethargic, miserable. I eventually found one thag agreed with me and I'm too afraid to stop taking it. Its not too big of an exaggeration to say that the pill pretty much controls my life, and I wish I'd never started taking the fuckers. There's an interesting episode of the podcast 'this podcast will kill you' about the development, science, history and politics of the pill. Its well worth a listen!

Original poster
smellyolddog · 24/02/2021 00:44

Oh wow thank you so much for all the podcast and reading information. And the fact I'm not going as mad as I feel.

It's so strange the impact this has had on me over the last 6 months, I was encourage to take it back to back to aid recovery from surgery for endometriosis.

I thought recovery was so so hard, UTI, bladder pain, headaches, lethargic, zero sec drive, I've felt slow and unmotivated.

I realised when I took a pill break in month 4 that my bladder didn't hurt for the period time, so did some reading around the pill and it effects on urology. Which is why I stopped it last month to test my theory.

But what's happening is I feel so different mentally and physically already.

The anger is worse though, I feel emotional and like wired, but I think that's me now, just being me, I even started to smell and taste and have happy memories, instead of this fog.

I'm so glad I posted I don't feel quite so confused and lost.

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BlackeyedSusan · 24/02/2021 00:48

mycrogynon.... could have gone full on beserker if taking it for longer...

Original poster
smellyolddog · 24/02/2021 00:48

Meant to add what happened was my trip to the GP about my bladder pain resulted in him prescribing me amitriptyline.. i trued that to stop the pain and ye sit stopped the bladder pain but I was a zombie.

So I've stopped all drugs, I feel like so many women on the pill must be now taking other drugs to offset symptoms caused by the pill? It's a crazy loop of medication that I hope I don't need anytime soon.

For anyone who's been on the pill will you look at HRT in the future? I'm worried now about what that will do to me.

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Original poster
smellyolddog · 24/02/2021 00:49

Sorry ignore my spelling I'm on the mobile 😬

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OccultGnuAsWell · 24/02/2021 08:22

I definitely had a an odd reaction to the single hormone pill prescribed once I was above a certain age (can't recall exactly, think it was 40+).

I didn't recognise the problem at first so compounded it by swapping the pill for the 3 monthly injection of the same single hormone contraceptive. Totally lost the sense of who I was. Hard to explain but I was definitely not behaving in the way I usually would.

I've so far avoided HRT in case it has a similar effect.

Original poster
smellyolddog · 24/02/2021 09:11

I did wonder if the strong reaction this time around was due to being in my 40s?

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Original poster
smellyolddog · 24/02/2021 09:14

I also keep coming back to something, I met my DH while I was on the pill and he made an comment about me being snappy and argumentative at the moment, which I am.

But said to me maybe you need to go back on the pill.. he prefers the slow, calm and fuzzy me, not the one that calls him out of stuff.

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WhereDoMyBluebirdsFly · 24/02/2021 09:21

When I stopped taking the pill I found my hormones were completely wacky for at least 6 months after. I think the pill messes up a lot of your body's own natural processes, so when you stop your body has no idea about how much oestrogen to produce, how much progesterone, at what ratio, so you end up on a hormone roller coaster until your body gets the hang of it.

I was on the pill from 16 to 32 with a few short breaks and I really regret it. I wonder how different my life would have been without these artificial hormones masking my natural inclinations.

NoBetterthanSheShouldBe · 24/02/2021 09:27

I took it from 18 for 20 years pre-children and between pregnancies. I can’t say I noticed a difference when I switched to Mirena, except that my periods stopped.
You have me wondering how much of the post-menopausal bolshie attitude was the real me all along.

Flippyferloppy · 24/02/2021 09:29

@TangerineGenie

I found it an excellent contraceptive - put me off sex completely
Me too and it made me very depressed. I have a copper coil now. No more artificial hormones for me, ever!
Original poster
smellyolddog · 24/02/2021 13:09

My head starts going down a whole process of thinking if the majority of women are calmer and suppressed in their teens to 30s and then again controlled by hormones from 45+ then what hope do we have if ever being completely ourselves.

It's a big theory that just crossed my mind, like a suppression of women. I'm no expert in matters like this just musing.

I need to give I time to settle but I feel so out of sorts it's hard to focus and I run a business so have a whole team replying on my being on the ball, and for the last 6 months I've been so disinterested.

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