What would your punishment be for this....

[Soubriquet]

We have discovered that food the dc don’t want to eat has been shoved under the wardrobe

It was found purely by chance.

We don’t normally move the wardrobe to hoover under it because it’s so big and cumbersome. It’s been under there so long it’s gone mouldy

They are both grounded tomorrow but what else could happen?

They have been eating in their room because there isn’t real room in the living room (very small room) and we eat different times as I’m in bed early due to night shift work.

The first thing we have done is squeezed a small amount of space in so they can no longer eat unsupervised. It will be an extremely tight squeeze but a necessary evil

I wouldn’t let my kids eat in their room when they were 15 & 17 let alone when they were 5 & 7. I hate to join the pile on, but that’s awful.

A couple of years ago I was in a restaurant when I choked. I was sitting across the table from DH but I couldn’t speak to him. The only way to get his attention was to bang the table. He had to do abdominal thrusts to get it up. I have never been so scared in all my life. What happens if one of your kids choke but you’re not there? Who is going to help them? Nevermind the food under the wardrobe, this isn’t safe. They need to be eating where they’re supervised by an adult.

They are tiny. I would be more worried about why my children felt they couldn’t tell me that didn’t want to eat the food. You should not punish them, it’s wholly inappropriate.

I remember being about four and being sick in my bed at night. I was too frightened to go and tell my dad and step mum because I knew I’d be in trouble. I fell asleep in a pool of vomit. I won’t go into what they did to me in the morning, and I’m not suggesting for a minute that you’re abusive to your children, or that they are frightened of you, but there will be some reason why they felt they couldn’t tell you.

I would implore you to find out why. Please don’t be cross with them.

If you have problems around eating with others, can your partner eat with them?

Are you currently getting help for the eating disorder?

I think people giving you a hard time are being unreasonable. Obviously you are in an awkward living situation and you’re doing what you can to make it work. And I can totally see how a kid would do this to get back to playing, it doesn’t need to be a physiological thing like people are suggesting. If it only looks like it’s happened a couple of times I would just tell them not to do it again and see what happens. Perhaps tell them they can’t watch TV, play games etc for an hour around dinner time. If they can’t do anything else during that time they may as well eat

I wouldn't punish them. I would feel guilty that my children were too scared to tell me they didn't like the food :(

The choice would be them sitting on the sofa with a tray

Thats far healthier than the wee souls eating alone in their bedroom

Why the hell are they eating alone anyway. You and/or your husband should be eating with them.

You need to look hard at your parenting long before you consider punishing them

I feel so sorry for your children

You can get a folding TV table from Dunelm for £9 - a pair would be useful to everyone; you and DP could use it for your own meals.
Or have them eat the table in their bedroom but not alone. They're far too little. Mealtimes should be sociable. Even if you don't want to eat, just perch on the bed and chat with them while they eat.

Think this thread will be zapped, but just in case: do not punish them for this. It would be cruel and unnecessary.

Children of that age should be eating with the rest of the family, however creative you need to be to make that happen, and however small the space.

Punishment would be no more eating in their room and that they have to keep their room tidy, every night they have to clean it up before bed and be honest about what they do and don’t eat. Maybe get a small bin that is only used for anything they don’t finish.

I never tell my DCs off for not finishing food but I do tell them off if they don’t put their plates in the kitchen afterwards. They have to clear their plates, wipe the table and clean up spilt food from the floor after every meal (6, 8 & 3)

I think the Op needs support, rather than censure from those who do have enough room in their living accommodation.
I agree best options are for you or dh to sit with them in the bedroom while they eat, or have them eat on trays in the living room where you can keep an eye on them and interact.

OP, could you buy something like this? Hide it behind the sofa whilst not in use and gives the children a table to eat from whilst sitting on the sofa?

The point is Mn is advice..... sometimes the advice is dire.

I don’t remember your last post but what did you think a 5&7 year old eating alone in their bedroom or sat all together in the lounge.

For some eating in the lounge is a no no. We don’t have a dining table as there is no room. But the needs to hide food / eating in isolation all sounds concerning. Eating should be a fun experience, there is no praise for eating new things the unhealthy things no wonder they want to just play.

@Boardeduplife I think OP has some issues (previous threads and she mentioned health and bribing kids due to her health). Honestly I don’t usually like to mention threads on threads.

However I feel to report this because it’s not normal OP is asking MN for forms of punishment. Her house cannot be that small where you cannot fit a children’s little chair and table so they can eat and even if that’s the case. Who lets 2 small kids eat alone?.

Most kids won’t want to eat their dinner if they are left to watch IPads or Netflix.

@Jolie12345

I think people giving you a hard time are being unreasonable. Obviously you are in an awkward living situation and you’re doing what you can to make it work. And I can totally see how a kid would do this to get back to playing, it doesn’t need to be a physiological thing like people are suggesting. If it only looks like it’s happened a couple of times I would just tell them not to do it again and see what happens. Perhaps tell them they can’t watch TV, play games etc for an hour around dinner time. If they can’t do anything else during that time they may as well eat

Maybe you should read the OP’s other threads and then see how unreasonable everyone is being.

@dementedma unless someone is using the living space as a bedroom no ones house is small enough that kids that young need to eat alone in their room. It’s just beyond ridiculous. If there’s room to sit in the living room there’s room to eat.

@Redglitter

The choice would be them sitting on the sofa with a tray

Thats far healthier than the wee souls eating alone in their bedroom

Why the hell are they eating alone anyway. You and/or your husband should be eating with them.

You need to look hard at your parenting long before you consider punishing them

I feel so sorry for your children

🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔

Op can you access any real life support?

@Soubriquet what sex are they? Personally I'd be swapping the rooms round if you can. Kids sleep in the living room - is there a fire in there? And using the larger room for family time

I wouldn't punish them, I'd tell them why it's wrong (rats, mice, bugs, smell, mould is dangerous etc) but unfortunately if you leave little children unsupervised crap happens. If you're in bed cos of work, why isn't DH supervising them?

God I hope this isn’t real. I can’t quite believe what I’m reading. Who makes children this age eat in their rooms?

I wouldn't punish them but I would move heaven and earth to have them eat downstairs and have an adult with them when they eat. Not for supervision but for company.

This is really going to out me to my cousin if she's on here. When we were little we used to suck the juice out of orange segments and then throw the rest behind the TV.

I don't know why. There was no badness in it. I saw my cousin do it and though that was the thing to do.

We didn't get in any trouble at all.

A 5 and 7 year old eating alone
You are grounding them tomorrow and yet still seeking more punishment. Please don’t. They don’t deserve it.

I wouldn’t punish I’d just explain to them why they shouldn’t do it and check they don’t do it again in future

Oh I don't know what you think about this idea OP but one of my DC's favourite treats is a "floor picnic". I basically put a rug on the floor in the living room and we eat there with the TV on. It's an adventure.

It's common in other cultures to sit on the floor and eat. So it's not a bad thing.

I use camping plates and put their water/juice in a bottle to make it easier (and more fun).

We don't always have picnic food. Sometimes it's a normal meal.

There's no logic as to why they'd hide food. I've been there, done that.

Bloody hell - maybe they {shock horror} just didnt want to eat something you dished up and you were asleep..its what kids do. Why would you punish them?
Explain the consequences of shoving food under wardrobe instead of bin and move on.