Neighbours' noise making my life a misery

[WWJWD]

Just wanted to rant really because realistically I don't think there's anything I can do apart from move house.

NDN has two teens.
One of them has her bedroom next to mine (terraced house) and spends every night chatting on her phone into the early hours. Her laugh is really loud and annoying and it carries through the whole house at night.

If I put the radio or soft music on to try and block the sound out while I try to sleep she bangs on the bloody wall. Every night this week I've nodded off to sleep around 11, only to be woken up by her constant screeching laugh at around 12.30/1am. I have to get up early for work and I'm knackered and miserable.

Several times I've tried asking them politely to keep the noise down after 11 - when I do, it stops for a while, only for her to start up again a few days later. I get that it's hard for teenagers, but this is next level selfish isn't it? I have my adult children living at home during lockdown and they like to chat on FaceTime with their mates so it's not like we're living like reclusive monks - normal family noise is fine - but they know to stop after 11 at night.

I'm tired and grumpy and it's making me so miserable that I am starting to feel actual hatred for these people. We've lived here nearly 20 years and had three lots of neighbours before this lot who've all been lovely and considerate. I miss them.

(We can't afford a detached house before anyone helpfully pipes up with that idea.)

Any miracle solutions? Are there any amazingly comfortable earbuds which I can sleep in (side sleeper) and which will block out noise while I listen to lovely soothing sounds? I just want to sleep.

@saturdaymorningtelly

OP I absolutely feel your pain. My bedroom used to be adjoined to the teenager next door's who also used to bang back when I would bang if he was loudly shrieking or singing at gone midnight. I used to want to go round there in my dressing gown and bang on the door (never did) but I was livid. I would NEVER have been brave enough to bang back to the neighbours when I was younger, I would have been scared stiff that they were going to tell my parents and I'd get told off!

I would 100% bang back on the wall and leave your music on all night (or at least for a few hours) while you sleep in another room. Unfortunately sometimes the only way to get through to these sorts of people is with a taste of their own medicine. I would also set a loud very early morning alarm right next to the adjoining wall while you sleep in another room - and sleep through it!

Please come back and update us with how tonight goes - hope you get a good nights sleep!

I know! mine wouldn't dare bang the walls if they'd been the ones making a racket. Oh yes, I have been this close to storming round in my dressing gown at 2am. It would not be a dignified sight though. I hope things are better for you now and you have better neighbours?

I will report back. The room needs a good tidy, a nice job for a Sunday morning. Perhaps I'll sing along to hymns on the radio while I clean.

Can you sleep in another room? Set up camp in the living room? Then get up early after a good nights sleep and start cackling like a witch next to the adjoining wall at 6am? Just play this very loud on a loop:

Wax earplugs are amazing. Make sure you warm them in your hands before using so they’re really soft. When I had nightmare neighbours I put them in before going to my bedroom so I wouldn’t get riled up by hearing them.

I'd be tempted to ring on the doorbell at 2am and ask her to shut up.
Every time

[quote WildfirePonie]Can you sleep in another room? Set up camp in the living room? Then get up early after a good nights sleep and start cackling like a witch next to the adjoining wall at 6am? Just play this very loud on a loop:

[/quote] That is genius! They'll think I'm insane

@Hels20

I think everyone is on edge. We have two kids who are in bed 8pm to 7am but if they have a tantrum about school work or are playing super hero’s for 10 mins or so we get hammering on the walls calling them fucking arseholes and shouting at them. They don’t seem to think they are unreasonable when they are up at midnight and shouting. The abuse has been awful and still shaken that adults can direct such venom at a 4 year old.

I expect they would be posting on here complaining about us.

It’s just so hard all round.

Oh my goodness this sounds like our situation. We are constantly on edge as if my children dare to play a bit louder than usual for 10 minutes - we get an aggressive knock on our front door (our front doors are right next to each other) and then they run inside. My children are also in bed the same hours as yours. The neighbours hate it the minute our children make any noise yet they don't think there's anything wrong with them playing loud music for hours on end or having their sound bar turned right up so its like living next to a cinema. Oh and having their bedroom telly loud til 2am. We heard them talking about us to their friends the other week and they said our 'fucking kids' are running up and down the stairs every day from 5.30am to 10.30pm its absolutely not true. But thats a whole other thread.

Neighbours can be absolute shit.

I would suggest writing them a letter or an email, outlining what you can hear and the effect on your sleep. Then they can read it clearly and have a chance to really understand. When I had trouble with noisy neighbours, after an email from me, they stopped their late night music.

My recommendations on ear plugs:
Sleeep earplugs really work.
Quiteon are also excellent. They are expensive, but they have a money back guarantee.

Oh Op I am so sad for you, this is just awful...I had a horror neighbour who played Robbie Williams full volume all hours of the day and night.I ended up leaving...on the day I left she cheered and whooped at me in delight. A right piece of work.....

Bearnecessity Robbie Williams over and over again... that's awful. What a horrible neighbour. What is wrong with some people?

Sorry to read so many of you are being bullied in your own homes just for normal family noise, specially when they're being noisy inconsiderate arseholes themselves.

Last night I had a lovely deep sleep. It was quiet when I went to bed around 10, but I put in my wax earplugs to be safe. Just as well - I was woken again at around 12.30am, but this time the sound was muffled enough not to wake me with a horrible jolt as it normally would. It must have been loud to wake me up through earplugs as I was in a really deep slumber by then, I was so knackered. I managed to drop off again soon after so not too bad.

At around 6.30 am the cat woke me up so I made a cup of tea, took it back to bed and listened to a lovely poetry programme on the radio. The poetry was accompanied by some lovely high pitched fluty music. After my early start I feel ready for some housework.

When we had this problem I just went round and rang the doorbell waking up the parents. After waking them a few times they swapped bedrooms so the son in question was on the detached side. Then we all got a better nights sleep !

@DumplingsAndStew ''You realise you are talking about a girl? Possibly a child of 13 years old?''

What's your point? that someone should go without sleep so that some teen can have loud conversation in the middle of the night?

At 13 you are perfectly able to understand the impact your behaviour has on others.

This girl also has parents who should know better, once they were told there was an issue they should have made sure that their kid stopped being a nuisance.

I don't understand how people can be so selfish. I live in a flat and would be genuinely upset if I was causing my neighbours problems like this and would do what I could to minimise any noise at night - there is no need to be yapping and screeching till all hours when you know you're disturbing others.

When I was younger I bought my boyfriend at the time a pillow which you could connect to your phone/mp3 player or whatever and play music. His mum said it was fab because only the person lying on the pillow can hear the noise so it stopped him from disturbing the rest of the house with his "racket" . Not sure if they still make them but might be worth a try if earplugs dont work for you?

I find macks silicone ear Plugs the best.

OP - one thing I would be careful would be putting anything in writing. I recently took some legal advice (from a property lawyer) and it is amazing what you might have to disclose - so if you start writing letters to them or allow it to escalate, you probably would have to disclose if you were going to sell. Don’t stoop to their level and create a nuisance (eg loud music at midnight); I would be up bright and loudly talking at 6.30am though.

A nuisance however is not loud voices or children playing. So be mindful of that. I think unfortunately sound proofing or using ear plugs is probably best approach.

Hopefully it will pass - when kids are back at school and can’t be up until gone beyond midnight...

@Bearnecessity I'm pretty sure my neighbour will do this when we finally get our moving date. I have no idea why she hates me so much as I've done nothing but help her.
She's the sort of arsehole to come out whooping and cheering and shouting crap at us. We've decided to be out as soon as possible just in case the new owner shows up early and witnesses it.

OP you have my sympathies. We had some neighbours who’d been partying all through lockdown until 4am and I was miserable and tense at the slightest sound as they cranked up in the evenings.

I had fantasies of blasting an air horn through their letter box at 6am.

I found a white noise machine quite helpful. I resented the discomfort of earplugs because of them and would just lie there being angry. I did get used to them though. I bought a pack of different types of earplugs to try from Snorestore. I have tiny ear canals it turns out, so most were way too big.

I also forked out for Specsavers fitted earplugs but they weren’t comfortable enough either.

Really hope you get a resolution- though sound utterly selfish.

@Catfeets , I know it is so sad people behave this way....sounds like a good plan.Don't look back....I hope you have peace and good vibes where you are heading....

Look....

Bose sleep buds.
Expensive but amazing, I wouldn’t be without mine now .

[quote DumplingsAndStew]@SmidgenofaPigeon

Blimey, what a selfish bloody cow she sounds!!

You realise you are talking about a girl? Possibly a child of 13 years old?[/quote]
Oh well that makes it OK then.
Young people are allowed to do what they want, of course they are. Sod everyone else.

@Bearnecessity the new house is run down and floods occasionally. But it's better than living next to a complete moron. We'll be link detached (attached at the back with thick walls) so fingers crossed we don't get as many issues with the new neighbours.
I can't wait. Should be out at the end of the month!

Or even better something by Diamanda Galas - her vocal performances have to be heard to be believed. Try the Litanies of Satan on you tube or Wild Women with steak knives. I love her stuff but you won't all and hopefully the dreadful girl wont either. I took my poor brother to one of her performances. I don't think he would go again!!!

Try this - on LOUD - Litanies of Satan

So she's very loud but bangs on the wall when you make noise? Well bang right every single time and then bang again in the morning to wake her up when you have to get up

I used to have a neighbour who had screaming sex sessions all through the night. It was utterly repulsive. I tried talking to her but she and her hideous boyfriend thought it was funny. She wouldn’t even move her bed away from the partition wall.

They didn’t find it so funny when I took to leaving my phone on the radiator by the wall (headboard height) at 6am with the alarm blaring continuously for 45 minutes. They moved out soon after.

No one wants neighbour wars but with selfish people like this but sometimes disturbing them when they disturb you is the only option.

Ugh Sorka no one wants to hear that. Good work with the early morning alarm. I've been doing the same, set my alarm for an hour of Radio 2 at 6.45 am, radio facing the wall every time I've been kept awake.
Funnily enough I've not heard anything the last couple of nights. maybe now I've had some unbroken sleep I will remember to switch the radio off when I wake up.