It's a Sin - AIDS in the 80's - Real life examples

[smellywellies9]

I have just finished watching It's a Sin and it's really hit me hard, I was born early 80's and had no idea how AIDS victims were treated back then, I feel like this has almost been hidden from us.
I would be really keen to hear some real life stories from people older than myself who lived through this. Things that have shocked me:
They were imprisoned in hospital wards with no one allowed in or out.
Homosexuals were not allowed a mortgage in the 80's and possibly 90's?
People use to destroy all cups etc that homosexuals had touched for fear of catching it.
The general ignorance from the government on this.
The attitude from the general public, were people really that cruel??

Thanks for the posts! And if anyone does know a history book on it then please let us know the name! (Nudge nudge SushiSoozie :) )

I think of the 80s as being school time... weird to think it was a while ago now Oldposter your post was really interesting, thank you

Having to declare homosexuality for mortgages, insurance and even for some jobs, yes, that too.

'The gay disease'.

The 80's were a good time in my life in spite of all this, but some of the homosexual men really had a tough time.

@SushiSoozie

I just dislike the idea that everyone before some arbitrary year was ignorant and prejudiced. That's simply not true. OF course lots of people were, but lots of people weren't. Gay people have always existed, we've always been a part of the population. We've always bought houses, had jobs, had families. Been accepted by some and not by others. I think you'd be surprised if you actually knew some real life stories from the past.

Your last sentence - exactly what the OP asked for! Some real life stories from the past!

But people kept shouting OP down....

There's ways of asking for stories. Titling a thread 'real life examples' whilst giving nothing of your own story is a tactic used by journalists. People share all the time on MN. It's the entire point of the website but it's always been considered bloody cheeky to come on and demand other's stories to educate or entertain you.

OP ignore people being outraged at your question.
If people do not want to share their stories, they will just read on by, it's not like you are knocking on their door.

It was a brilliant series ,beautifully written with great actors.
Yes, if you had HIV or aids at that time, you would not have got a mortgage or as others have said life insurance. Obviously your life expectancy was reduced dramatically.

Sadly in the 80s there still was a lot of people who lacked any knowledge of HIV or Aids and believed all the tripe peddled about it, they didn't have google, it was just what the news was telling them or doing their own research if they wanted to know enough.

My father had a friend who tried to keep his sexuality well hidden in those times, especially where we lived.

I remember the AIDS campaign in ‘86. I was 10 and it scared the shit out of me.

I’d agree with pps who say that the 80s wasn’t completely intolerant- in fact, I’d argue that it wasn’t that different to now. Sure, being gay is more widely accepted in mainstream society today, but there are still a lot of prejudiced idiots out there. ( they probably just feel less empowered to comment)

Watching Its a Sin, I was appalled at the ignorance of some characters, then I remembered there are people today who think COVID-19 is a hoax.

Watching Its a Sin, I was appalled at the ignorance of some characters, then I remembered there are people today who think COVID-19 is a hoax.
We mentioned this as well.

Normally I avoid anything that might be a journo posting. I am not bothered by this thread either way, I remember it, for various reasons and if I am making a contribution to history, well that's fine. Many people will be curious about something they have never experienced and I was enjoying a pretty good life which wasn't directly affected by AIDS but I did see a fair amount of how it affected others. Men who had no idea what was going on until it was too late, and the after effects, emotional distress, life changing and devastating pain, the loss of friends and lovers.

Condom sales increased in the 80's, but unfortunately many people didn't bother because they didn't like them or needed the money for a fix. It did improve safe sex, and signified an end to the attitude from the 60's -70's - 'Free Love'.

In the early Eighties, as a young straight male , I lived in a small city on the south coast. We had three gay pubs , one predominantly lesbian , and a thriving gay community. There were plenty of older gay men who had retired with their partners and lots of young people who partied hard and went to Brighton a lot too . We also had a Theological college with a large set of camp men who gave each other womens names...so you can see we had a thriving and accepted gay scene.
BUT..other places nearby were not so accepting and there was antagonism and prejudice which became hightened by AIDS ..I remember seeing grafitti saying "GAY...Got Aids Yet?"...so there was a backlash and fear ...I think PRIDE and AIDS awareness campaigns did much to change that .
I was part of a mental health team that counselled some people with AIDS ..there were more than a few middle aged married women who had tested positive after finding out their husband and father of their children was a closeted gay man .
I think there were certain areas of the country that had a gay community which was accepted and loved and many many other areas where no one would admit to knowing a gay person , and had prejudices to match .

@ginandbearit

Sounds like Brighton, which became the gay capital of the world, Kemp Town is particularly popular. I love Brighton and Hove.

I was born in 1980 and have strong memories of the playground bullies ‘she’s got AIDS’ and confusion among kids about touching something & catching it.

I recall my granny telling me, aged 70ish, after a news article on Pride, around 1996 perhaps: ‘well everyone always knew there were some people like that, it wasn’t a very big deal, but what I can’t understand is why they have to make a big fuss about it!’ She was from a wealthy family in Newcastle but lived a very quiet life after the war, so not exactly a lady mixing with a wide range of people.

On the other side of my family my great aunt was very involved in the lighthouse in London and I remember her telling me around 1997 about doing the make up for people with AIDS who had sarcoma. She would probably have been about 65 - really posh but always a bit rebellious and different.

My parents lived in Chiswick in the 1970s and knew their gay neighbours - though I don’t feel my dad is that accepting of being gay he certainly accepted that they were there.

I think class / education / values and personality had an impact on people’s views. But it’s interesting that initially I thought I had little experience or knowledge about the aids epidemic, but those are things I was casually told about growing up within my extended family. I think there was a level of ‘acceptance’ where as long as people weren’t confronted with it they were happy for people to do what they wanted, but we wouldn’t call that acceptance now, though it still exist. Then there are other people who were / are downright ignorant & homophobic.

I also don’t think it’s a crime to seek out first hand information rather than trust print or screen stories, from a forum where people are know to share their stories. As long as it’s part of a wider search for information. I hadn’t realised it all only began in 1981, I felt rather ignorant myself.

I bought my Living Will form from the Terrence Higgins Trust. No-one seemed to have heard of Living Wills until AIDS.

www.tht.org.uk/

@oldposter ..bit further along the coast ..Chichester.. But I lived in Kemptown a few years later ...interesting times !!

I was born in the early 70s and remember the scary 80s adverts very well, they were terrifying, but very effective.

I think for me, as a huge fan of Starsky and Hutch, it was the experience of Paul Michael Glaser's family that made me realise that it wasnt just transmitted through sex (his wife contracted the virus through a blood transfusion, and then tragically their son and daughter were also infected).

I also remember being asked if I had ever had an HIV test when applying for insurance etc.

@ginandbearit I lived to Chichester in the early 2000s and wasn’t aware of any gay/lesbian pubs - which ones were they in the 80s?! Am intrigued!

Bit surprised to heard people describe government ads as ‘scaremongering’ or that people were given a ‘death sentence’ that turned out to be ‘false’....::

Seems to be a sad lack of understanding of the absolute miracle of anti-retroviral drugs that completely changed HIV from something likely to end your life prematurely and horribly, to a chronic condition that can be managed like any other.

It wasn’t a shift in attitude that caused this, it was scientific endeavour. Driven by publicly funded research.

I’ve worked in areas where anti-retrovirals aren’t readily available and so have cared for people with AIDS. Haven’t looked after anyone in this country. There’s a massive divide between countries on this. It’s not over elsewhere, and it’s not an attitude shift that’ll change it, it’s access to the same drugs we enjoy.

And for those seeing parallels to ‘another virus’ and implying those parallels are hysteria or scaremongering..,,

The parallel is clear: life-threatening virus being the focus of incredible scientific research.

There’s just no grasp of scientific advancement and what it achieves, is there.

Disappointing.

@helloviroids ...I think they'd mostly gone by then ..The Bush was still gay friendly and had a lesbian clientele...the other was the Cattlemarket almost opposite but that had closed by then I suspect..also The Victoria but that too had closed...I think the gay scene changed quite a bit..I was an outside observer so not sure where everyone went !

I was at University in the mid-late 80’s and it brought back a lot of memories. You definitely had to declare whether you’d had a test for life insurance and some other products into the early 90’s when I was applying for stuff. In those days mortgages were almost always sold with life insurance. I think you may have also had to agree to the insurers being able to access your medical records. Obviously this put people off “admitting” to anything or getting tested. There weren’t the private clinics available like now where you could go for an instant test. Talking about the subject with a GP about 20 years later and she said she came across a significant number of people my age who still suffer worry, anxiety around sexual health due to the AIDS campaign. There was the message that when you sleep with someone you are also sleeping with everyone they have slept with.

The other thing that resonated for me was having a group of friends that you lived with that were like family (and better than family). I think the gulf between people in their late teens and early 20’s in the eighties and their parents was generally now much wider than it is today. That could have just been my experience of course.

Have genuinely learnt a lot reading most of these posts so thank you for sharing!

It's great to know how far we moved forward on this, and still shocking that this happened so recently. Must have been a really difficult time for so many people. I regret not asking my grandparents more about their stories about the war etc, I would rather not believe the media and hear genuine history instead.

Really surprised about the people who have taken offence from someone wanting to hear about a really important part of history that is not widely documented at all. I was not ask info for personal stories, just general questions about the past. I think it's really important that this story is told more widely, there's a lot we can learn from it, especially in the midst of a pandemic. I will definitely make sure I tell my children about this when they are old enough to understand.

@Shaniac

Seems a bit of gay censorship going on on this thread. Posters adamant no one should give their personal experiences and instead op should google, read books or watch films some of us have never heard about. Fucking nuts.

Whats wrong with recommending books written at the time about peoples experience with AIDS. Did you know children werent allowed treatment for aids because the medicines at the time werent licenced for paediatric use.

Haemophiliac children were told that their factor VIII injections were perfectly safe and to continue using prophylaxis (injections every day to prevent uncontrolled bleeding into joints damaging the cartilage).

My DH is a haemophiliac. His parents didn't give prophylaxis. Most of his friends' parents did. His friends were mostly dead by 1990.

I remember when Freddy Mercury passed away and some of the media obituaries were so awful. Homophobic and judgmental, 'Gays deserve AIDS' style. If you read it in this day and age you'd find it hard to imagine that this sort of thing was actually printed in mainstream and didn't cause outrage either

Whats wrong with recommending books written at the time about peoples experience with AIDS.
Did you know children werent allowed treatment for aids because the medicines at the time werent licenced for paediatric use.

Nothing is wrong with suggesting books. But there is everything wrong with trying to derail and put a stop to people sharing their real life experiences on the matter.