How are only children doing?

[Sethy38]

Watching my two play wrestle and it just hit me... how the heck are one child families doing? Must be particularly tough I imagine, but I often read posts saying how much their children say they enjoy being only children, so perhaps that’s still the case?

I'm a single parent so DD can see her (also only) cousin. She's not doing well at all otherwise. Misses her friends terribly.

My only is loving all the adult attention but missing his friends. Zooming his friends is not enough at 6 he wants to run around with them. Everyone is having a rough time - I have friends who are struggling to give multiple age kids the time and attention they need.

I think o my children should be permitted get together with another child once a day.

It must be dreadfully lonely

The same child

Must be so intense for the parents too

Ours isn’t an only child or little. He’s 17 and can’t see his sister or nephew. Other than 6 part days in College in September, he hasn’t seen another close to his age since February 2020.
He’s been remarkable because he understands why it’s necessary (to protect dad) but Christmas time was incredibly tough on him. As will his upcoming 18th birthday be, I suspect. We’re pinning everything on the vaccines and him being able to take up his university offer in September.
Makes me so sad to read negative coverage of teenagers when there are hundreds of thousands quietly getting on with protecting others.

My 4yo is ok although we do meet up for a walk once a week with his best friend who is an only child too. I believe only children should be allowed a bubble.

My dgs is an only and its breaking my heart to see how lonely he is for another childs company, he started school last september and was doing so well, he loved it, was totally engaged and made so many little friends. He keeps asking my dd how many days is it to go back to school, he is not sleeping well and keeps bursting into tears over nothing, one day he asked if he could just stay in bed with the ipad as 'I cant play with anyone' my dd and her husband are working so hard to keep a business afloat, trying to home school etc etc, I know its shit for everyone but dear god I'm worried for them. It just makes me cry for him.

Thread about this here, OP
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/coronavirus/4144710-If-you-have-an-only-child
Not exact same question as yours but you might be interested in the discussion and responses x

Not good. This is probably the first time I've been grateful for 'screen time' and technology which I normally try to discourage, however in DD's case it's the only opportunity she has to speak to her friends on a daily basis.

@DenisetheMenace I have nephews in the same position as your son, they have been absolutely fantastic in their attitude towards all this, they too havent seen friends/started college etc, they are pretty stoic but I just feel for them, they are missing out on so much and doing it with such good grace - I am hoping that this time next year it will be all 'sex an drugs an rock-an-roll' for them, I will personally take them to the pub!

Mine’s nine. She’s doing ok. Facetimes her friends; when the weather’s ok she plays out with a classmate. She’s enjoying spending time with me.

My son is an only child and also has asd so he has found it incredibly hard, his lifeline has been his PS4 network, being able to connect with fellow gamers. He misses the riding for the disabled sessions terribly because they help with his anxiety. He is slightly better this time than the first lockdown because he is going to school mornings so at least he is doing some schoolwork

My dd is an only child and she is fine, but we do have a really good relationship and she is well connected to her friends via social media, video calls etc. She is 15, so I think it's a bit easier than it would be for younger children.

Some of her friends don't have good relationships with their families and are feeling really isolated right now, so having siblings isn't necessarily a protective factor.

thebabessavedme

Do you feel they’ve regressed? Our son seems younger, somehow, than he did before all this started. He’s gone back to Minecraft and hobbies he had when he was younger. Not necessarily a bad thing. Just wondering if it’s a common experience in these circumstances?

Mine is 4 and she's struggling now. School work is fine but she misses her friends so much.
Yesterday she bumped into a friend and had a meltdown when we had to go, it's the first time in all this that she's lost it.

@DenisetheMenace, Speaking to their mum (she has 3 under 18 boys, shudder) she thinks her youngest is the one suffering most, he is 13 but ECV and struggles with change, he waved off one brother to uni who very quickly returned and claimed his bedroom back which went down like a lead ballon, he has very much regressed in his school work and is back to sleeping with soft toys which he previously had ditched. The other 2 are fine, just bored to tears and arguing about shit that didnt used to worry them.

Mine DD is 2 and an only child but her sister is only 11 weeks old. Not the greatest playmate. She sobbef twice last week when kids tried to talk to her at the playground. Her speech is very behind. I take her out so she sees people and encourage her to say hi to other kids, but she is now quite socially anxious. DH is in a public facing job so dont want her in nursery. It's tough at the minute. I try not to think about the effect this is all having on her development, but I am starting to reach a point where she needs some interaction with children. She is basically locked away.

That is meant to say 'not an only child'.

I’ve got an 8 year old only. His sleep has gone to shit and his anxiety is fairly High. DH and I are both keyworkers so he thankfully goes to school 4 days per week most weeks. He misses his grandparents dreadfully. His friends aren’t quite at the ‘playing games online’ stage yet, but he sees his classmates every day on teams.

thebabessavedme

I understand how hard it is with little ones but I do think that teens, most of whom have really done their bit to help, are overlooked a bit.

We’ll join you and yours in the pub next year 😁

Rubbish tbh
Almost 5 year old dd and really struggling

The only thing keeping my only ds going is being able to chat with his x box friends (go to his school but most not in his class) I'm worried about the amount of screen time but I'm trying not to think too much about it as it's literally his only way of socialising with similar aged kids.

He's just started zoom karate as well and seems to be enjoying that, he's seemed really lonely a few times and asking to FaceTime friends etc...it's bloody shit and makes me regret not having another in situations like this

I understand how hard it is with little ones but I do think that teens, most of whom have really done their bit to help, are overlooked a bit.

It is tough for teens, but they can at least interact via social media, video call etc. It isn't ideal but it's not awful either. Younger kids tend to play in a much more physical way which is hard to replicate remotely, so I think it's more challenging. My dd is a teenager by the way.

It is possible to facilitate remote play for younger kids with a bit of imagination, though. My dd used to play with her cousin like this when they were younger, because we wanted to maintain their connection despite the distance between them. It isn't the same as playing together, but it's better than nothing.

Not an only as we also have a 17 year old at home but apart from SN the teenager is well, a teenager so doesn't really interact with my youngest. He also seeks more like another adult in the house.

So my Ds9 feels like an only a lot of the time. He is such a sociable creature and is really struggling with not seeing other kids. We had home educated before and he only started school last September and loved having loads of kid his age around him. He gets quite anxious and upset about it. He sat and cried last week and said he wished he had a sibling the same age as him to play with. It's very sad.