My DF is dying. He has Covid and lung cancer and has refused to be ventilated - there is nothing more they can do except make him comfortable. He is the most amazing man, who dedicated his life to others, working as a nurse and then for homeless and refugee charities. He received his lung cancer diagnosis in the first lockdown two days after he retired.
He sent a goodbye message this evening saying he didn’t think he would make it through the night and how much he loved us all. I can’t sleep for waiting for a call from the hospital - they have said that they will let us visit if he deteriorates overnight and regardless that we can see him tomorrow. This will be the first time I’ve seen him since we had a brief socially distanced walk to the park on Boxing Day.
Help me find strength to get through the night, to cope with seeing him to say goodbye, to ease the big gap in my heart when he does, and to deal with all the practical shit that will be inevitable after. In particular help me to find the strength and words to ring my DM once his pain is over, she is in another hospital also with Covid and too unwell herself to visit.