Tell me what you *love* about being in your 50s, please

[bdaygal]

I'm just about to turn 50. Please inspire me by telling me what you love about turning 50, being a fifty-something. What makes this decade great.

Anything inspiring you or other fifty-something women are doing or have done?

Thank you!

Placemarking as interested in your replies

I'm a very young older person which is my perspective now after a few years of feeling sad at ageing. I'm feeling more valuable as a person even though I understand that society might value me less as a woman. But what society thinks matters less and less.

I can't wait til my teens are a bit older. I will have the freedom to use my holiday going on yoga retreats, vegan cookery courses, jewellery design courses, maybe take refresher courses in my music, who knows! just feel like the world is my oyster now that I don't have to try and be normal and couple up. I'm single which does make it harder when you've nobody to say come here with me, let's go to x, let's go to y. All i need is to be brave and go on my own or find my tribe, and that is good, it's good to have one more big challenge. it's exciting.

ps I turned 50 in lock down as well so that was not what I'd pictured, and I feel that I consciously and a little bit unconsciously was on a journey of acceptance from about 47.
It was such a flat day but I felt ok because I feel like this is going to be a great decade.

I'm more assertive and find it easy to say no to things. I worry less about what other people think and am generally more confident. I'm fairly comfortable in my own skin and wear what suits me rather than sticking to what's in fashion. I have friends in all age groups from their 20s through to 80s and have learned that friendships cross the barrier of age. I'm no longer brooch and have more free time as I now just have one teenager left at home. Policemen all look around the age of 15.

I'm no longer broody not brooch!!

I care less what people think of me - that constant sensitivity about whether I'm liked or not has gone. I try to be kind and ethical but some people just won't like me but others will and that's OK

Embracing comfort over fashion

The desire to go back and apologise to everyone over 50 that I thought were boring/stopped trying/had nothing to offer/insert offensive ageist thought here when I was younger

I'm probably the most content I've ever been.
I've embraced white hair and convinced myself I look like Helen Mirren (I don't)
I'm doing well career wise, with more focus on my goals now family need me less
I'm happy - despite this year. I've realised I need very little and I appreciate the small things.
I don't care about what other people think of me as much as I did - I have become comfortable with who I am and in my own skin.
I am much better at saying No. I am comfortable with adding because I simply don't want to if people persist or demand reasons.
It is my best decade (so far).

I love it,

the freedom, the mortgage is paid,

no employer holding me over a barrel, I could leave if I felt like it.

I'm healthy, I'm fit,

I don't have dependents any more, they have grown up! My money is my own.

I have time and space for myself.

I am so happy not to have to deal with or plan for periods ever again.

I am looking forward to retirement,

I am going to get a covid vaccine.

I have lifetime of knowledge and experience. I have actually acquired wisdom!

I have seen and experienced a lot, so am particularly unruffleable.

I have many happy memories to enjoy.

I have many long term friends I have known for decades, 30, even 40 or more years. I know them very well, they know me very well, no keeping up appearances, we can just be ourselves with each other.

I know what I like, I know what travel/food/tv/ music/ sport I enjoy, but still have plenty of new things to try.

physical, emotional social and financial stability, active, fun life, comfortable with what I have - I am never going to be rich! But I long ago stopped caring about that.

Hoping for grandchildren one day!

Thank you for this thread. I’m only 44 but worrying what’s next. I know it’s daft but I had my kids young and while I love my (precovid) life it’s hard to see what the next bit looks life.

Is anyone pushing their career in their 50s?

No periods.

Life started at fifty, I started living it on my terms with what was best point for me and my teenagers. It's been the best decade yet. We've travelled, had new experiences, done things I never thought we'd do and overcome some difficult things.

I'm not pushing my career, but somewhat to my surprise have found myself in a middle management role, higher than I ever thought I wanted to be. And I absolutely love it.

I'm in a graduate profession but pottered about, taking years out to be a SAHM and then doing part time and bank work. It's something of a shock to realise I'm suddenly reasonably senior at work, run quite a large department and am good at what I do.

I've got one teen left at home and DH is retired and picks up the slack when needed so I can focus on work without half my attention being on what is happening at home.

I don’t really care what people think of me anymore, and it’s very liberating. I feel that I wasted a lot of energy on it when younger.

I’m loving having adult children - they are so interesting and fun to be with.

DH and I can finally holiday when we want rather than dependant on school terms,

We still have a mortgage but we could move and downsize, and we both have interesting jobs that are fulfilling but we’re not looking to keep climbing the promotion ladder.

We have a close knit group of friends stretching back over many years. And they are true friends who’ve shared the bumps along the way with us so there’s no need for any pretence.

Life is good with more to look forward to but also an appreciation of what we’ve achieved.

Not me, but my MIL is in her late fifties - she only works part time now and (pre covid) had an amazing social life. She says the best thing about being older is that she doesn’t get wrapped up in drama at work or with friends, everything is about her just relaxing and having fun.

My children are grown up and independent.

I have time to myself, time to spend with dh, and to pursue hobbies.

We can travel outside school holidays (in normal times at least!).

Grandchildren (the joy of this decade, without a doubt).

No more periods.

No more mortgage.

I no longer much care what people think of how I look or dress. I have the confidence to say what I think. I have thought through my values and beliefs and so decision-making is much easier.

I'm 51 and don't give a fuck about being on trend (doesn't mean I don't like clothes). I don't feel like there are any arbitrary standards of anything that I have to live up to. My generation got really bloody angry about a lot of things but I'm blissfully free of wokeness.

And loving the lack of periods.

Still in the early part, but I haven't paid off my mortgage or seen the dc leave home (one still in primary) so I would say everyone will have a different experience of their 50s (obviously) but I was hopeful for it being an interesting decade with lots of travel and being a bit less bothered about work - not that I'm not working hard, but that I don't feel out to impress anyone anymore. I don't like feeling that younger people think I'm not interesting! I can horrify them with stories of life "before the internet" which is quite amusing.

And yeah, my kids are teens and we took out a new mortgage just few years ago but it's not huge

DS was going to go to university this year, I wanted to rent the house and go travelling. Covid put an end to it so it is now a waiting game.

I will hit my mid 50s next week (shit, how did that happen?). I am younger than that in my mind though!

No periods, no mortgage, long marriage, ds 25.

I am really enjoying not giving a fuck any more; there aren't that many people about whose opinion I really care.

I begin a new job in about 10 days time after being a trailing spouse abroad for 13 years, so that will be interesting, and get my brain moving again. I no longer have the tolerance for office politics, or game playing, so will go in, do the work and then leave it all at the door in the evening.

Thank you @NovemberR I’ve got middle manager, I want to be CEO of a lovcsl authority in 15 years but i don’t know if I’m unrealistic and missed the chances!

Thank you, glad to hear all your positive experiences!

Lovely to hear those saying it's their best decade yet - that's what I'm aiming at!

The no periods thing is a bit passe for me as I passed that hurdle a few years ago... I won't be mortgage free quite yet, but am aiming for that by mid 50s. My dcs are lovely young people.

Still looking to kick ass in my 50s, and, like NovemberR, finding myself inadvertently in middle management after years on a career slow track while fitting work round dcs. Now planning to earn as much as I can so I can pay off the mortgage and do whatever I really want.

Here's to all the amazing women in our fifties!

Still married.
The dog I have always wanted.
Decent car.
Daughter at university
Relatively well off.
Looking to retire to Spain in 4 years.
Turning 57 in may

Time to make friends a priority (obviously difficult in these COVID times).